Page 28 of Make Me Whole

Her words punched me in the gut. I didn’t even blame her because I deserved it, but I hated it. Despite the many valid reasons I had to stay away, the truth was that I had feelings that were becoming harder and harder to ignore. The idea of her hating me, or even being angry at me, killed me.

Still with my hands held up, I took a step closer to her. “You have every right to be mad at me,” I admitted softly. When she didn’t take a step back or flinch, I took another. “Even if you hate me, I understand. I was an idiot for not calling yesterday and a prick for yelling today, but can’t you see why?”

“Not really,” she whispered.

My brows tugged together. I was fucking sure she was lying. How could she not know after the way I had kissed her?

But then she added, “Yesterday, you said you were sorry we kissed, and today, you called me a child. If those two things are not obvious rejections, then you’re a really confusing man, Max.”

I couldn’t help but chuckle. From my viewpoint, she was also a really confusing woman.

“I never said I was sorry we kissed,” I admitted and took another step closer. “I just said that I was wrong for you, which I am. And that I was sorry I lost control, which I was. Damn, Sky, I was a moan away from fucking you in that damn chair, and you deserve better.”

I ran a hand through my hair and filled my burning lungs. “As for today, I was worried sick and didn’t handle it well. I can’t stand the thought of losing someone I . . .” I swallowed the words that almost escaped and sighed before continuing, “Someone I care about.”

We stared at each other in silence for a while. The atmosphere was heavy with the mixed emotions of the morning, but it wasn’t uncomfortable. Sky was never uncomfortable for me.

After a few seconds, she took half a step in my direction. She stopped to my left, a little in front of me, and with our gazes locked, she touched the back of her hand to mine and our fingers tangled. We were holding hands without actually holding hands. It was different and intimate and a moment that I knew I wouldn’t ever regret.

Sky exhaled a tired breath, then said, “Both Ella and I had terrible dreams. She dreamed everybody had abandoned her and that she was back at Eli’s house. She woke up screaming. It was awful.”

I squeezed her fingers between mine. “And what did you dream about?”

She closed her eyes in a painful expression. My stomach sank in fear that the dream was about my reaction to the kiss, but I held my emotions steady and gave her time. No matter what, I wouldn’t cause her any more pain.

“You don’t have to say it. It’s okay.”

Those beautiful, sweet lips curled into a ghost of a smile. She opened her eyes again to look at me. “I dreamed about the worst time Eli abused me.”

My jaw clenched with anger as my brain refused to process the true meaning of her words. “Abused? As in—”

“He was creative. He abused me in various ways. This time was a mix of all types of abuse—verbal, physical, and...” she trailed off as if admitting to suffering sexual abuse was too much for her.

Al had told me about his suspicions, but to know for sure made me murderous. Everything in me screamed to kill that prick with my bare hands, damn the consequences. But as I looked at Sky, I saw that vengeance wasn’t what she needed. She needed comfort.

I wrapped her in my arms and kissed her temples. “I’m so sorry you went through so much pain. No woman should ever endure such a thing, you least of all. Whatever you need, I am here for you. I’ll listen. I’ll kill him. I’ll hold you. I’ll do whatever until you realize you don’t have to be afraid anymore.”

The moment I said those words, she dropped her head onto my shoulder and cried.

12

SKY

Ibelieved him. For the first time in so many years, I believed a man who wasn’t my father, and the notion was more terrifying to me than being alone with Eli. I knew the pain my monster of an ex could bring, but the potential for damage that came with Max was unforeseen.

Still, the way he held and comforted me while I cried soothed parts of my soul I didn’t even know needed fixing. It also gave me the courage to do the one thing I had never done before. Tell someone my story.

“It started with verbal abuse,” I said to his shoulder, my voice breaking.

His fingers tightened behind my back. I turned my face so that my cheek rested on his shoulder and sniffled.

“At first, it was only when I burned the food or dropped something. He’d say I was stupid, but it was no more than that. I didn’t think it was abuse because I was in love and knew I had made a mistake. In my mind, he was admonishing me for it and I deserved it.

“But then it became more frequent and more aggressive. He went from calling me dumb, to calling me trash, to calling me a bitch. I cried whenever he said those things, but crying only made it worse. He hated to hear me cry. That was why he started hitting me.”

My eyes filled with a fresh wave of tears as I remembered the first time he struck me. A shiver ran down my back, and I think Max felt it because his body tensed.

“He hit you because you were crying after being called a bitch?” Max’s whisper was loaded with anger. Though normally, the emotion would make me flinch, I didn’t. I knew that his anger was for me, not at me.

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