Page 8 of Big, Bad, Mountain Man
My heart tightens and my throat goes dry. This is too good to be true.He’stoointo me. Maybe that’s a red flag.
Bella is my red flag expert. She says there are three red flags you should never miss. Violent displays of any kind toward people or animals…it shows the person hasn’t learned the tools to manage their emotions.Lack of emotional intimacy…because who wants that?And finally, bread-crumbing…someone who gives you morsels of love to keep you interested, but never enough to sustain you.I don’t think Wilder fits any of these, but I don’t know him well enough to know for sure.
“I don’t understand you,” I finally say.
“You didn’t enjoy yourself?”
“No, I did.” I sigh. “I really enjoyed myself. I just… I don’t know. I’m a mess.”
His thumb rolls over my lip. “You’re not a mess. You’re human. Let me make you feel good.”
Somehow, my heart and clit all throb at once and the urge to climb on top of Wilder and ride him like a stallion is almost unbearable.Almost.
I’m satisfied enough that the awareness of reality is clear in my head.
I roll onto my back and stare up at the stars, hoping to find the answers to all my problems. Or at the very least, a sign from the universe that this man wouldn’t leave like all the others. But… there’s nothing there. Only silvery lights and a nearly blue moon.
“Have you ever been in love?” I look back toward him, watching his face as it stays steady on mine.
“I think love assumes that you care for that person even when they’re out of your life, right? You love them, but for whatever reason you couldn’t make things work anymore. Is that love?”
Okay, it should be a red flag that he doesn’t know what love is. I make a mental note to tell Bella later, then shrug my shoulders. “If it is, I’ve never been in love. I couldn’t care less what Tucker is doing right now.”
Wilder rolls onto his back and tucks me under his arm. His heart beats against my ear. “No, I guess I’ve never been in love either. I’ve had a few relationships, but nothing stuck. Pretty shitty for an old guy like me.”
That’s the sign from the universe. The one I needed. He’s non-committal. That’s why a big, good-looking guy like him is alone. He’s had women but none of them have been good enough. I’d simply be another notch in his belt. Another casualty to the blaze that burns around him.
I close my eyes and soak in the last few seconds of warmth and whatever it is I’m feeling. Then, with all my strength, I turn away.
“Where are you going? I want to know more of you.”
There he goes again, saying all the right things.
I glance toward Wilder. “Look, I appreciate what tonight was, but I know how this works. You fuck me, you say nice things, we pretend like we’re going to make this work, and then you ghost me. Let’s save each other the drama.” I hold out my hand to shake his as though we’ve completed a business deal.
He only smiles. “I appreciate that you think you know everything, but that wasn’t just sex for me. I have feelings for you, Bree.”
I know I shouldn’t laugh, but still, laughter bubbles up. “Okay. Now I know you’re crazy. No man catches feelings for a womanaftera blow job. That’s not a thing.”
His brows narrow and his hands land on either side of my shoulder. “You’re talking to the wrong men.”
“Nice. You’re good at this. I’ll give you that.” I strip off his flannel and set it over his shoulder before walking back down the path, his big boots still squeaking. I should return those as well, but I’m afraid of what might be on the ground and my heels are still in his truck. “I’ll walk home from here. Thanks again for the night.”
His giant body pulses behind me and his hand lands on my shoulder, stopping me in my tracks. “You’re not walking yourself home. And this whole pushing me away thing, is going to stop right now. You know you’re feeling this too. So, feel it.”
I roll my eyes and cross my arms over my chest like an obstinate teenager who’s been told to turn down her music. I’m not sure why, but I like his bossiness. “You do seem to know everything, don’t you?”
He nods and grins. “Not really. I’m an idiot about most things, but this, whatever it is, I know you feel it. I reckon that kind of feeling, for me anyway, doesn’t happen a whole lot if ever.So… maybe we slow down and see where it goes.”
I stare at him as though he’s an alien from another planet. “I can tell you where it goes.Ifyou don’t ghost me, you’ll continue to say all the right things, and I’ll obsess over you. I’ll believe I’m falling in love. I’ll introduce you to my kids, then you’ll get scared, run, and I’ll end up depressed all over again. Except this time, I have to explain to my kids why their mom is the problem and the reason they don’t have a dad.” I pause and suck in a deep breath. “Look… this is all my fault. I wasn’t ready for dating and–”
He leans in and kisses the top of my head. “No one is ever ready for anything, and I know well enough what I’m getting myself into. What time is the wedding tomorrow?”
I take a step back and narrow my brows. I’m surprised he’s still thinking about that. “What?No.You’re not going to the wedding.”
He nods and drapes the flannel over my shoulders. “You can push me away, but I’m going to keep showing up. And deep down, I know you want me here.” He glances toward me, his stare soft but intense. “Am I wrong?Tell me I’m wrong and I’ll go away. Otherwise, I’ll be right here waiting for you to come to your senses.”
“And what if that takes forever?”
