Page 27 of Shiver
But I swear I hear her voice.
Shoving the door open, I pause at what I’m seeing. Sure enough, it’s Temca. Her arms wrapped around Rake’s waist from behind. Before I can say anything, I hear him speak.
“No, thanks,” His voice is hard. As I stare numbly, trying to fight the betrayal I see at him with her, I see the tension in his shoulders. How still he’s standing. His hand on the key in his door.
Opening it for them? I’m going to be sick. I thought he—
“I promise, I know what I’m doing,” Temca purrs in a voice that I know too well. The one she uses when she wants to ride my dick. Bile rises in my throat. A pit in my stomach. This isn’t happening. How could he—could she—
“Doubtful,” Rakesh says, pushing her hands off him roughly and turning to face her. I don’t know if he sees me, but he’s now facing in my direction. And I can see the disgust on his face. The hard set to his jaw.
It’s not themtogether.It’s something else. At first I feel relief that he isn’t sleeping with my girlfriend behind my back. But that relief is quickly washed away when I put together what’s actually happening.
“What guy doesn’t want a blow job? What are you, gay?” Her tone is no longer suggestive and flirty. She’s angry now. Angry that he’s rejecting her. Fuck. “Come on. Surely a stressed grad student like you needs a little relief.”
Temca places a hand on Rake’s stomach, her fingers quickly curling into the waistband of his pants. I’m nearly jumping forward but freeze again when he grabs her wrist so tightly, she gasps as he yanks her touch away.
“Don’t touch me,” he growls. Repulsion dripping from his voice. Dark eyes cold and glaring.
“We can work something out,” she says, more business like now. Seduction forgotten. Anger gone. Just determination now. “Just let me suck you off in payment for not telling my boyfriend what you saw. What straight guy wouldn’t go for that? You’re just his tutor. He’s not even paying you. I will pay you for the both of us.”
“Being gay has nothing to do with my disinterest in going anywhere near your mouth,” Rakesh deadpans.
“You’re a jerk,” she snaps. “He won’t believe you. Just like he doesn’t believe everyone else who claims they’ve seen me with someone.” She pushes her hair back and fixes her shirt as she turns on her heels and freezes. Her eyes meeting mine.
Shock. Dismay. A whole fucking lot of emotions flood her eyes before she gives me a shy smile. “Hi, Egon. I came to—”
“Don’t,” I say, my voice hard. Swallowing the hurt and betrayal placed where it rightfully belongs now, it’s easy to cover it with anger. “You can go.”
Her eyes widen before they flutter in a way that I used to melt at. She used to be beautiful to me. That’s not what I see anymore. I see the manipulation for what it is. “I just came to see you. You’ve been working so hard and—”
I let the stairwell door slam shut behind me, watching her flinch as I storm over. Grabbing her arm, I shove her back toward the elevator. “Bye.”
“But—”
“You have no business here. Leave.”
She stumbles forward a few steps before catching her balance and turning to look at me with a pout. “You misunderstood what you saw, Egon. I was just—”
“You were just what? Trying to blow my tutor to pay off my debt? I should thank you?” My voice is rising now. I take some sick enjoyment at watching her shrink away. I’m a big guy, made bigger by my anger. “Or should we talk about the debt you implied you had about what Rake witnessed? Or maybe that you were forcing yourself on him when he clearly said he wasn’t interested, to which you accused him of being gay because god fucking forbid that someone tell you no!”
I take an angry step forward, not knowing what I intend to do when all I’m seeing is red, driven by the hurt inside me, when Rake’s arm circles my waist and pulls me backward, my back hitting his chest. “Don’t,” he murmurs in my ear. “Just let her go.”
“Leave,” I bellow at Temca, making her jump and move back several steps. For a minute, she stands there looking at me, but then she turns and moves toward the elevator, glancing at me over her shoulder several times.
Swallowing thickly, I lean back against Rakesh, trying to catch my breath. Shaking, we remain there, watching Temca disappear inside the elevator, while looking at me with big pleading eyes. My chest is heaving as I try to ignore the stinging in my eyes.
Why does it hurt? It shouldn’t. It fucking shouldn’t. Not now that I see her for what she is. And know what she did to me.
Fucking played me! And tried using one of my friends to do it. Tried to bribe him to keep her secret. With sex!
Rake pulls me backwards into his room. He doesn’t let me go, which is good because I think if he did, I’d completely fall apart. I’m trembling. So angry. Furious. The tightness in my chest making me sick. I’m not going to cry. I won’t. She’s so fucking not worth it.
His hands move on me, but I can’t make myself turn. My bag is taken from my shoulders, but I feel like a weight has settled on me. Then he’s pulling my shirt over my head. I let him. It drops to the floor. He nudges my foot and I kick my shoes off as I try to suck in a breath. When did it get so hard to breathe?
I only look down when his arms circle my waist to undo my jeans. I watch, my breath catching, vision blurry. The button pops and then his fingers find my zipper and push it down. I take a breath, picking my head up to look forward again, but not seeing anything at all. Still hearing her words as she propositioned Rake.
My pants fall and Rake’s hands land on my hips. “Come on,” he murmurs, his voice quiet and gentle. I let him nudge me along, guiding me further into the room. I don’t ask. Don’t even care. He pushes me into his bed as there’s a knock on the door.
