Page 36 of Just Our Secret

I scrubbed a hand over my face before pulling it away when I reached my cheek, which, based on the blood covering my palm, had definitely split open.

Turning away from the driveway, I prayed to anyone who would listen to fix this. To let him understand. To let him cool off and realize that he knew me, and he knew I wouldn’t hurt his sister.

God, if he had any idea how much I loved her and for how long, he wouldn’t worry.

Andi met me in the yard. Part of me was surprised she hadn’t been at my back during the attempt to talk to Connor, but maybe she’d thought it’d be better just the two of us. At least she hadn’t heard me say I loved her for the first time when I was practically yelling it at her brother to make a point.

“You okay?” I asked, seeing her red-rimmed eyes and splotchy cheeks. Damn it, I hated that it’d gone down like this.

“I don’t know. But we need to get you some ice.” She touched the side of my face, somewhere next to where Connor had hit me.

I folded her into my arms, and she wrapped hers around me, resting her head on my shoulder like it might give me more comfort. I did the same, ducking my head and nuzzling into her hair. Breathing in the scent of her shampoo, the full weight of what’d happened bore down on me. My shoulders slumped, and she pulled me closer.

“He’ll come around,” she said quietly into my shoulder, and if I was hearing her right, with the barest measure of hope in her voice.

“Yeah,” I said, knowing that after everything he’d just said, I had absolutely no hope in mine.

NINETEEN

ANDI

The doorbell rang right on time, and Liam jumped off the couch to answer it after I nodded it was okay. I followed him to the door just as he swung it open to reveal Wade’s smiling face. It was a full, real smile that he gave my son as he held up a hand for a monster of a high five. But when his eyes met mine, they were weary. The last week had been hard on us both.

“Uncle Wade!” Liam yelled, throwing his arms around him as he stepped over the threshold. Then he looked behind Wade, frowning. “Where’s Uncle Connor?”

“He’s not coming over today, baby,” I said, smoothing his hair.

“Why not?” Liam asked.

“He’s just busy.” I looked up at Wade with a sad smile.

Neither of us had heard from Connor since Thanksgiving. He hadn’t been staying at the apartment he and Wade shared, but Wade wasn’t sure which friend he was crashing with. He figured any one of them wouldn’t mind lying for Connor if he asked them to. Especially if they’d only heard his side of the story.

“How come you keep coming over by yourself, Uncle Wade? You always come with Uncle Connor.” Liam looked between us with a curious expression.

Wade stooped down so he was eye level with Liam. “What’s the matter? You don’t like hanging out with me?”

“I do. I was just wondering I guess.”

I cleared my throat and steered him into the living room. “Liam, Mama likes spending time with Uncle Wade by himself. We’re good friends, remember? So it’ll probably be just the three of us pretty often from now on. Okay?”

Liam shrugged. “Okay.”

Wade’s eyes were soft when I looked up at him, and I felt a tug of relief that my words had at least managed to ease some of his pain. I hoped he liked the sound of it being just the three of us because that was what I wanted. I was still incredibly hurt and sad about what happened with my brother, but at the end of the day, this thing with Wade was for real. I loved him, and I thought maybe he might love me, too. He hadn’t told me as much, but on our nights together when he’d share my bed and then leave before Liam woke up, I couldfeelit.

We settled onto the couch and dug into the popcorn I’d made while Liam cued up the kid flick he’d picked out for us to watch. It was one of his favorites, and he’d laughed and giggled through most of it.

After the movie, I looked down to find Liam fast asleep with his head in my lap. Wade’s long arm was stretched out across the back of the couch, his hand at the base of my neck, playing with the strands of hair there. It all felt so domestic and sweet. I could see our whole life unfolding this way. I saw us together, happily watching Liam grow, and maybe one day with Connor sitting in the armchair on the side, no longer mad at us. We just needed to get through this hard part first.

“We should get him to bed,” I said, petting Liam’s head.

“Yeah. I wish I could stay with you tonight.”

My lips pulled into a thin line. “Me too.”

Wade had recently started doing overnight duty at the station even when we had class the next day. He said picking up extra shifts was important to keep padding his savings because he eventually wanted to use it for a down payment on a house. It wasn’t like he’d told me he wanted it to be our house or anything, but at this point, in my mind, I thought of it that way to make me feel better about spending less time with him now. It felt like we were working toward a future together, one step at a time.

Wade stood and picked up Liam, cradling him in his arms, and carried him to his room. I busied myself with putting the popcorn bowls in the sink, pausing to feel guilty for not waking him up to brush his teeth. Should I do that? I probably should. No doubt he had kernels stuck between his little teeth after all that popcorn. Deciding to do it after I said good night to Wade, I carried the bowls to the sink.

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