Page 59 of Loving You

“Yes. It is an order. We need to date like normal people. We went from hating each other to living together to—” He put his salad aside and turned back to me, then lowered his voice to barely audible. “To making all my fantasies come true about fucking you on every piece of furniture in my house.”

I swallowed, my blood feeling as thick as mud while my body reacted to his words and the images they conjured up. It’d been a damn good two weeks of damn good lovin’, and now we were sitting on a bed… alone in this attic.

Maybe lunch-break sex wasn’t such a bad idea after all.

“April?”

I shook my head. “Sorry. Yeah?”

“Date. Me.”

“But why? Do you not like how it’s been going between us?”

He let his head fall back and sighed. “Likeisn’t a strong enough word.”

“Then why do we need to go on dates? Or date ‘like normal people’ or whatever you said? If ain’t broke, don’t fix it.”

With a rumbling growl that came from somewhere deep in his chest, he lowered his gaze again. He didn’t speak, but I heard the silent command for me to give in.

But I couldn’t always play by his rules or I wouldn’t be me, now would I?

“Tell me why,” I challenged, lifting my chin and spotting the flash of heat in his eyes. Eric might like taking that bossy tone with me, but he sure as hell enjoyed it when I tossed it right back, too. “If you tell me why, thenmaybeI’ll consider it.”

“Because,” he said through clenched teeth, leaning even closer, “I love you.”

My mouth dropped open, and I was pretty sure the surprise I felt was reflected back at me as if I were looking in a mirror. He definitely hadn’t planned on saying that out loud—based on the look of utter shock in his eyes—but that didn’t mean he didn’t mean it, which might’ve been the most shocking thing of all.

“You—”

As if committed now that he’d gone there, he reached up and cupped my cheek. “Yes. I love you, April Carrigan. This doesn’t mean we’ve made it—far from it. I’m sure we’ll have our share of fights because I can’t imagine loving you would come without some measure of risk in that regard, but I don’t need more time to pass for me to admit what I’ve known for weeks now.”

“Weeks?” I squeaked.

“Weeks. Two weeks to the day, if you want to get specific.” He dropped my face and checked his watch. “Two weeks on the dot in about six hours, in fact.”

Meaning—oh, well, yeah. Right aboutcomeo’clock on our first night together. That sex had been borderline life-altering for me, and I hoped I hadn’t imagined the vibe between us that said he felt the same way. But it’d caused him to realize he loved me?

“I don’t want you to say it back,” he said, taking my hand and giving it a squeeze.

“You don’t?”

He shook his head. “I didn’t mean to drop this in your lap, and I’m not about to rush you into anything you’re not ready for. But now that you know, I also need you to know that…fuck, April. You’re it for me. I think—no, Iknow—that even with all our differences, we can be great together.”

I felt my lips start to curve into a smile, and when he quirked an eyebrow, I pinched them together to stop it. Butcome on.The idea of him mentioning our “differences” while telling me we’d be great together was a damn good reason to smile.

“However long you need to get through the current situation and tell me how you feel, that’s how long I’ll wait,” he promised. “In the meantime, as far as I’m concerned, I’m yours and you’re mine. Do you understand?”

I nodded, not having the clarity to form words.

Well, that wasn’t exactly true. I had clarity. Heaps of it. But he didn’t want me to say it back, and somehow, I knew that even if I felt clear about returning his feelings—because hello? How could I not?—this was a good time to shut up and obey the guy.

He had a reason for not wanting me to say it back, and it was tied to us getting beyond the turmoil that had us sharing the same roof. Once we did that, once we were both free to feel however we felt regardless of whatever was hanging over our heads, if I said it back, he’d know I meant it. He’d know I meant it as much as I knew he meant it just now, mistake or not.

“So, since I’m not saying it back, and I’m acknowledging that you mean it, I guess there’s only one thing left for me to say.”

His eyes warmed as a smile tugged his lips up. “What’s that?”

“No, wait. Two things. First, okay,fine. You can take me out on dates if it’ll make all of this feel morenormalfor you.”

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