Page 133 of Gin and Lava

“We were together for a year,” he says calmly, taking another long drag of his beer. “It’s obvious when you’re acting out.”

“And what if I am?” I ask, haughtily. “It’s not like it’s any of your business.”

“You’re not happy!” Sam says, swiveling quickly to face me—a slap of concern in his gaze. He lays on the puppy-dog eyes, the ones he’s perfected to show he cares. But it feels so damn practiced. “And this guy, that’s you lashing out.”

“Maybe you don’t know anything about me anymore.”

Sam reaches out and pushes a lock of my blonde hair behind my ear. It completely robs me of my anger. He did that when we were together. It was a silentI love youwhen we were in a crowd, or at one of his charity events. It’s a comfortable and intimate gesture, making me flinch at its sweetness.

“You know that’s not true,” he says softly, his fingers lingering at my ear, reminding me of all the days and nights we’ve spent together. I look toward the ocean, his hand still lingering at my temple. It would be so easy to turn my face into that palm and ask him about all the things Shauri was saying. Ask him what he regrets. Ask him what he truly wants.

But a pang of emptiness echoes through my chest.

Samdoesknow me—or at least, a version of me, but even that version he wasn’t satisfied with. And I always wanted more of him: more of his time, more of his attention, more of his affection, more of his heart. I was greedy, and he told me I was too much, that I shouldn’t want that from the man I loved.

“I’m still heartbroken,” I say, daring to look back at him and admit the hole he left in his wake.

“I know.” He nods, moving those fingers to my jaw. “Let me make it up to you, Naomi. I miss you. We had something good.”

“We had something …” I whisper, trying to ignore the warmth his fingers spread through my face. “But you threw it away.”

I step backwards, away from him. I can’t be this close to Sam. He’s too comfortable for me to be around. There are patterns and rhythms that we built together, and my body remembers them. There’s history between us, and my body wants to rekindle old habits.

“This beach house,” Sam says, nodding behind me to the building, “your parent’s house,thisis where you belong.”

I cringe when he says that. If only he knew the truth.

“You don’t have to stay in your tiny apartment in Honolulu,” Sam continues, stepping toward me. “I can give you this. A life like this. You and me, we make sense. The doctor and the beauty, that’s whatyouused to say.” He laughs, remembering how cheesy it was. But then his features soften, those memories making sense to him.

Ididused to say that—The Doctor and the Beauty—as if we were a fairytale written in the stars. I used to say all sorts of cheesy things about how compatible he and I were … because he needed convincing. But it didn’t work. He still chose his career.

“You’re just jealous,” I say, lifting my chin to meet his gaze. “I’m with someone else now, and you’re all alone. You never really believed in us.”

“Yes, I did,” Sam insists, reaching for my wrists, but I step away again. “I got scared. I’m human, Naomi. And my job—it’s intense. It’s not an excuse, I know that, but I was overwhelmed.”

“It’s the nostalgia of Shauri’s wedding.” I inch toward the beach house. “It’s got you feeling sentimental. That’s it. And I have a fiancé, so …”

“But you don’t love him.”

“Right,” I say sarcastically, remembering our previous conversation. “Because I don’t look at him the way I used to look at you.”

A thumb of emotion presses up my throat. He knew I was crazy about him. He knew my devotion. And he still threw me away.

Maybe I’llneverlook at another man like that again.

Maybe Sam was the one time my heart was willing to go all in.

“Well, it’s not how I look at you anymore either,” I brave, my insides tossed like kelp in the ocean. “Good night, Sam.”

I turn on my heels and march toward the blur of tiki torches and the beach house. Shauri told me that Sam wanted me back, and now he’s confirmed as much, but I don’t trust it.

I don’t trust him.

I stare at my feet pounding in the sand, my head swarming with confusion—when SMACK! I run straight into the person in front of me.

Hands wrap around my shoulders and I look up, finding Mason standing in the center of the path. My stomach drops. I glance back at Sam who’s not that far away, definitely within earshot.

“Did you hear all that?” I ask sheepishly, lifting my chin and stepping back from Mason’s arms to give us space.

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