Page 41 of Accepting Love

I’m confident that was one of the oddest conversations I’ve ever had. This time yesterday it would have embarrassed me to the point of wanting to fall through a crack in the floor and never come back out.

Today is a new day though. Today I can ask my Daddy if I can watch him masturbate. Today he just told me I will get that opportunity eventually. Pleased, I turn around and skip toward the door.

Part of me can’t help but picture him in my bathroom, stripping naked, climbing in my shower. I imagine him flattening a palm to the wall while he grips his erection with his other hand and slides it up and down until he comes so hard it hits the tile.

I really do want to watch that. I also want to get into the shower with him, hold his shaft myself, and feel the power. I shudder as I hit the stairs. I need to stop dreaming about Daddy’s penis before I enter the kitchen and face Audrey. I might not be too embarrassed to talk to Daddy about it, but I’d be mortified if Audrey were aware of my conversation and thoughts on the subject.

When I enter the kitchen, Audrey is at the island cutting melon into bite-sized pieces. She lifts her gaze and smiles. For a long moment, she says nothing.

I stand in the entrance, letting her adjust to my new look. I have on no makeup. My hair is in pigtails. I’m dressed younger than usual. Can she tell I’m not wearing a bra?

I wring my fingers together, waiting for her to say something. I’m not worried she’ll judge me. She knows I’m Little. She’s known it much longer than I have. But I need her approval more than any other human’s. She’s my rock. My mother figure. I love her to pieces.

Finally she speaks. “You look so happy, Caro.”

Do I? That isn’t what I expected her to say first thing.

“Like life was breathed into you. Like you’re in your skin for the first time.”

I flush. Is it that obvious?

“I noticed his fancy car in the driveway and assumed he was still here.” She glances up at the ceiling. “I guess he’s in the shower?”

We can hear the water running. It’s not hard to figure out he’s bathing.

“Yes, Ma’am.” I flinch and swallow hard as those words leave my mouth. “I…” I don’t know what to say. I don’t call Audrey Ma’am. I call her Audrey.

She comes around to my side of the island and runs a hand down one of my pigtails. “These are cute. Did Kingston do this?”

I nod.

“It’s okay, Caro. Everything is going to be okay. If it feels more natural to call me Ma’am, that’s okay too.”

“It’s weird,” I murmur.

“You’re in a headspace. It’s normal. It would be harder to speak to both of us differently than to incorporate me into your space.”

I nod. She gets it. I don’t know how she gets it, but she does. “Okay.”

“I’ve always mothered you, Caro. You know that. You crave that sort of thing. I know it will be different now, but don’t you worry. Kingston and I will work out the details. You don’t need to fret over that part.”

I lick my lips. “What details?”

“Which aspects of your care he wants to take over and which aspects he wants me to continue to do. I won’t step on his toes, Caro. I’m like a mother-in-law to him. I will turn your care over to him and let him decide what role he wants me to play.”

I don’t know how to respond. All I can think to do is launch myself into her arms and hug her tight.

She hugs me back, holding me fiercely close. “I love you, Carolina. I’ve always loved you. And I’m so damn happy for you.”

When I finally release her to lean back, I meet her gaze. “What if it doesn’t work out? We hardly know each other. It’s happening so fast. I’m scared out of my mind.”

She strokes my cheek. “I know you are, but you’ll figure it out. You know him. You’ve known him a long time. It’s more like you finally admitted to each other you belong together. It’s a friends to lovers story.” She smiles.

I giggle. “You’ve been reading too many romance novels.”

She shrugs. “Maybe, but the trope fits. You were both in denial, ignoring the obvious. It hit you in the face. You jumped. Leaped off the cliff. Now you’re falling together, but you’re holding hands. I believe you will land on your feet next to each other.”

“That’s so poetic.” I grin.

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