Page 15 of One and Only

My stomach tightened, and I wasn’t sure why. I turned my attention back to Olive, kissing her temple.

Olive’s arms tightened around my neck.

Josie joined us by the side of her car, and she held out her arms for a hug.

Olive motioned to get down, and once her feet were on the ground, she ran to her mom to say goodbye.

Josie closed her eyes as she hugged our daughter, and I looked away.

It was hard, knowing that my excitement of having primary custody of Olive for an entire year was because Josie was making a choice of her own. And it was one I understood. Saying goodbye to the tiny person who owned our hearts was the hardest thing I knew how to do.

We’d both had to do it in different ways. Splitting the time never really got easier, even if the routine was well-established. We did it, though, because there was comfort in knowing that she was loved in both places, and she was the priority in all our choices.

Josie’s eyes were glossy with tears when I glanced back down, but she blinked them away when she pulled her face from Olive’s. “Barry is still in the back seat,” she told Olive. “Why don’t you find him a safe spot in Daddy’s car before you go in.”

Olive nodded, clambering into Josie’s car and pulling her fluffy white stuffed animal from the back seat floor.

Josie stood with a sigh.

“You okay?” I asked her.

She swallowed, watching our daughter as she walked over to my SUV and started buckling the stuffed animal into the back seat. “No.”

“She’ll be all right.” I glanced sideways, and Josie had rolled her lips together, clearly trying to keep her emotions in check. “Your first visit will come quickly.”

Her hand was shaking as she swiped underneath her eye. “I don’t know if I can do this,” she whispered. “What if she needs me? Or you get sick? Or she gets scared? Or you have to work a long day?”

My stomach tightened uncomfortably. “If any of those things happen, we will handle it, okay? She’s gotten scared before at my place, and it’s been fine. I’ve had to work, and we figure that out too. All your reasons for going with Micah are still there.”

At the mention of her soon-to-be husband, she visibly relaxed. “I know. I just … I didn’t expect it to keep getting harder the closer we get to leaving.” She pressed a hand to her stomach. “And I don’t know, maybe I stay back and we keep the custody the same, or … maybe Olive would do okay if she was with us there half the time.”

My head snapped up. “What?”

Josie gave me an apologetic look, opening her mouth to say something, when Olive slammed my car door shut, Bear safely tucked away in the seat next to hers.

My heart thundered uncomfortably in my chest.

“Josie,” I said under my breath, “we talked about this. Leaving her school, her friends, going across the world, it’s exactly what her pediatrician said we should avoid if we want to help her come out of her shell.Consistencyis what she needs.”

Josie gave a quick look at Olive, who was skipping over the parking lot lines next to my car, completely oblivious to what we were discussing.

The two of us argued so rarely, but if one thing would trigger a fight of epic proportions, it would be this.

We’d picked apart this topic for the last year—and not just me but her and Micah too. Olive’s pediatrician. The child therapist that our daughter had been seeing for months leading up to this change. We’d covered every angle. Again and again and again.

And as a group, we decided this was best. It’s why I bought my big, boringly decorated house less than ten minutes from Josie’s … because it was in Olive’s school district.

“I know,” Josie said on an exhale. “I’m sorry to do this now. To have second thoughts at this point. Micah is frustrated too, if that helps.”

I gave her an incredulous look. “No, it doesn’t help. I don’t want that for you.”

Olive skipped over to us, gripped my hand in hers, and tugged impatiently. Unwittingly, I smiled.

“I know, sweet pea, we’re going.”

Josie blew out a hard breath. “I think having Micah living in the house with us for the past year has made me realize how much harder it was when I was doing it by myself.”

Somehow, I managed a nod.

---