Page 13 of Take Me Home

“Caleb and Becca won’t be here for another half hour, so you can relax if you want. You sleep okay?”

“Like a baby. That bed was really comfortable,” he said. Guilt bubbled in my gut. Should I just let him sleep there every night? What would be the harm?

Him being even closer than he already was all the time, that’s what. A constant temptation down the hall instead of a temptation down the path and over the creek. And I couldn’t be like the creep who had taken advantage of me so many years before. I wouldn’t.

I responded with a vague smile and turned my attention to the clipboard detailing June’s tasks. If Uncle Bill was trusting me to run things, I’d better have a grip on it before everybody got there.

There was a month yet before the peaches would need to be picked, right around the 4th of July. The blackberries would be right around then, too. Most of what had to be done was mowing and clearing paths, a never-ending cycle of cutting grass, only for it to rain and come back two-fold.

It was a familiar, albeit tenuous rhythm. I’d spent some of my college summers out here, helping with mowing. At that time, I saw it as an opportunity to build muscle while getting paid. After years of being a desk jockey and semi-faithful gym rat, it probably would be good for me again.

I’d just about worked out the week’s assignments when I heard boots crunch-crunching on the gravel.

“You know, you never answered any of my questions about you last night.” Jake had his arms folded across his chest, leaning against the barn door. His forearms, muscled and veiny, threatened to distract me from his statement.

“Hey, wait a minute. I didn’t ‘never answer.’ You never got to asking,” I shot back. He pinned me with a skeptical look. “Fine. Fire away.”

“You know Eli because you’re his cousin, right?”

“Correct. Dad’s sister’s son.”

He tilted his head back, making finger motions in the air to draw the family tree connecting me to Eli. Satisfied, he went on.

“Do you usually live around here, when you’re not mistress of a farmhouse?”

“Trick question,” I started, hearing the bittersweet relief of a car pulling into the drive. “I grew up here but just moved back from Raleigh.”

I wasn’t sure how much of my life I was willing to share just yet. It wasn’t the best time to drop that I’d just been laid off and ended an engagement. But who knew how much Eli had told Jake prior to him starting?

A car pulled into the drive. I stood up from the bench to announce that the conversation was over, ready to welcome whoever had just pulled up.

* * *

The workingdays were long and strenuous, but the week itself flew by. Each night, I was dog tired, maybe playing a little guitar, vegging out with Netflix, or reading until my book hit me in the face heralding time for lights out. That usually occurred not long after sunset.

Through the team’s lunches together, we got to know each other a bit better. Becca’s boyfriend worked at the local American Legion hall as a bartender, and her family was from Hamlin. She hoped to use this summer’s experience to get some permanent work in agriculture somewhere local or get her own plot of land. She was ready for a change from the tractor-trailer she’d been driving since she was 18.

Caleb’s family was big and loud, much like mine. He was saving up to go to technical school to become a plumber. I had hot plans to have him get his feet wet with some work on the orchard’s irrigation system, which functioned on a very basic level but desperately needed updating. Jake would be done with his school the following December, with two classes to teach in the fall and his master’s thesis to complete.

Everyone was getting along, and I had no complaints. I proposed the idea of a group dinner on Sunday night. Jake would stay on the farm full-time, Becca would come and go, and Caleb would go home over the weekends. I remained on the fence about whether I should just let Caleb and Jake stay in the house. Distance and privacy felt more natural, but I’d also really enjoyed having roommates in college. It would be nice to have a little sense of community again, even if that community was just two dudes, one of whom made my stomach do weird things.

Whatever I did, I never wanted it to seem like I wanted more time alone with Jake. There was something so icky about grooming the summer help as a lover. I didn’t know how much Eli would hate me for dating his friend, or how much Uncle Bill would look down on me for dating one of the workers.

Still, our interest in each other was undeniable. I’d catch him watching me load up the four-wheeler for a day of work, or shooting a glance over at me while we worked close together. One day, he even drew attention to it, waving dramatically over the fence while I was weed-eating in an adjacent field. I’d had something of an unfortunate morning, with a host of technical and menstrual problems plaguing me. In short, I was in a shit mood. So in response to his emphatic waving, I’d cut the gas to my weedeater to see what he needed, only to find that he just wanted to say ‘hi.’ I rolled my eyes in annoyance, but couldn’t help laughing.

“There she is,” he’d said, giving me a sympathetic look. “I’m not used to grumpy, frowny Darcy. I had to make sure you were still in there.”

“You’re the worst,” I harrumphed, shaking my head as I wandered back to what I was doing.

“You love it!” he called after me.

“Yeah, yeah,” I yelled back, waving him off. But yeah, I did love it.

Still, there was much I didn’t know about him, but really wanted to ask. It just didn’t feel appropriate to say, “Do you have a secret girlfriend?” or, “How old, exactly, are you?”

Nonetheless, it was Jake who haunted my thoughts. The night we’d spent under the same roof, the way he read my moods, the way he did little favors to make my life easier like gassing up all the mowers. Whoever was lucky enough to be with Jake was well-kept. Plus, add that mischievous glow in his eyes, the strong V shape of his torso, and the tender strength of his inner arm and it was clear. He was a catch. All of it had me tied up in knots, second-guessing my every move around him.

* * *