Page 59 of Wild Hearts

“Me,” I mutter.

Ivy gives me a look that tells me this conversation isn’t over. The fight goes out of me as I realise, it’s not. I can’t keep hiding secrets from my friends. It’s eating me up inside.

She finally turns away, grabbing her bag as she walks out of the kitchen and through the shop to the front door. Lachy raises his eyebrows in confusion, but I simply shake my head as we take off behind her.

Ivy is silent as we walk along the beach toward Glasson Point, ignoring the bottle of tequila Harley and Lachy are passing back and forth. I chew on the inside of my lip, wondering if I should just come clean to Ivy and tell her what happened. She’s right: sheismy friend, and I can trust her.

As I smile at the guys horsing around, I realise I can trust all of them. I may have only seen them over summer for the last six years, but in that time, we developed a strong bond. These guys already knowmostof my secrets. They’re my ride or die. Isn’t that why I moved here? Because it was a safe space for me? These guys are family. I just need to swear them to secrecy. I can handle them knowing the truth. What I can’t handle is Brady finding out. He’ll never look at me the same way again.

When we reach the top car park at Glassons Point, Harley scrambles over the broken wooden fence that leads out to the rocky cliff face, holding his hand out to steady me as I follow suit. Lachy does the same with Ivy before climbing over himself. We navigate the rocks to reach our spot. Ivy’s still not looking at me as she settles herself between Lachy’s legs, leaning her back against his body. The night is still and warm, the waves crash against the rocks below us.

I haven’t had a drink since that night, but I’m going to need some liquid courage. I reach over and take the bottle from Harley who is sitting on a boulder next to me. The alcohol burns its way down my throat, simultaneously warming my body as I wince from the bitter taste. My stomach churns but I close my eyes and take some deep breaths, managing to keep it down.

When I open my eyes, they’re locked onto Ivy as I try to convey the message that I’m ready to talk, consequences be damned. I recall all the times we sat up here over summer’s past, playing truth or dare when we were younger before graduating to drinking games when one of the guys managed to sneak some liquor from their parents.

The memory of the drinking games gives me an idea.

“Never have I ever had my drink spiked at a party.” My heart thuds in my chest as I swallow another mouthful of the liquor.

The smiles slip from Harley and Lachy’s faces as their eyes drift between Ivy and me. Ivy’s face pales. I take another fortifying breath as I prepare to drop the next bombshell... the one that will change everything between us.

“Never have I ever been sexually assaulted by my year twelve formal date.” I take another mouthful of tequila and flinch as Harley lets out a loud curse from beside me. I feel a little callous with that statement, as I know that Lachy was Ivy’s date. I blink back the tears that threaten to fall. I’ve cried enough tears over Drew Pembroke and what he took from me.

“Oh shit, Wren,” Lachy’s voice is full of emotion as he frowns over at me, but I shake my head and hold my hand up for him to give me a minute while I compose myself.

“I don’t want you to feel sorry for me,” I finally manage to choke out, looking around at my friends. Lachy’s grip has tightened on Ivy, who is frozen in front of him, staring into space. Harley’s jaw is clenched, and he shakes his head. “I just want you to be here and not judge me.”

Harley damn near explodes. “Judge you? Are you for real, Wren? We would never judge you for what some asshole did to you.” His voice lowers to a growl, “Who was it? Tell me his name, because I swear to God, we’ll–”

“What? Hunt him down? Cut his dick off?” My laugh is humourless. “While I agree that he deserves nothing less, it’s not going to change what happened.”

Lachy murmurs something in Ivy’s ear. She shakes her head as a tear slips down her cheek.

“Was he arrested? Do you have to go to trial? We’ll be there with you, every step of the way.” Harley reaches over and pulls me into a bear hug. “We’ve got your back, Wren. You’re one of us, and no one hurts one of our own.”

My eyes don’t leave Ivy and Lachy as a knot forms in the bottom of my stomach. Why hasn’t she said anything?

“There’s no trial,” I say quietly, and Harley’s arms tense. “He was never arrested. There were no witnesses.” My stomach twists as I remember my nightmare–the door to the room opening, the voices, the door closing again. “There was no evidence because I waited too long to tell anyone. By the time my mum took me to the hospital, there was no trace of drugs in my system. It would have been his word against mine that I didn’t sleep with him willingly. He was careful.”

Harley curses again, squeezing me so tightly I can barely breathe. “I’m so sorry this happened to you.”

I reach up and brush away an escaped tear. I’m almost knocked off my rock as a blonde blur flies at me and Ivy wraps her arms around my shoulders, burying her head in my hair. Choking on a sob she asks, “Why didn’t you tell me?”

I shrug. “I was... I don’t know, ashamed, I guess. I didn’t want anyone to look at me differently. I didn’t want anyone judging me for getting myself into that situation.”

Harley spits out another curse.

“We would never do that.” Lachy runs a hand through his dark curls. “God, Wren. I can’t believe you went through that.”

I squeeze my eyes shut, trying to block out the onslaught of emotion and the memories of that night flowing through me. I shudder and Ivy leans back on her knees and looks up at me with her tear-streaked face.

“Are you okay?”

I press my lips together and give a clipped nod before shrugging again. My confessions aren’t over yet. I take her hand in mine and give it a squeeze. I’m not sure which confession is harder for me to admit to her: what happened with Drew, or what happened her brother. I know she knew about my crush... it would have been hard not to notice the way I used to watch him with puppy dog eyes or get flustered and tongue-tied every time he was in the room. But having a secret relationship with him behind her back? I don’t know how she’s going to react to that.

I swallow hard before saying, “I need you guys to promise me that you won’t say anything to Brady.”

Confusion crosses Ivy’s features, but I don’t miss the look between Harley and Lachy. They’re not surprised at all.

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