Page 57 of Wild Hearts

There’s only one I can fix right now. I take a deep breath. “I’m going to Theo’s Baptism.”

Ivy glances between me and Mum but remains silent.

“I’m not going to be his godfather.” I trace an imaginary picture on the dining table. “I’m not ready for that. Not yet. But I’ll go.”

“Really?” Ivy whispers.

I nod and Mum leans over and kisses my forehead before beginning to clear the table.

My sister wipes a tear from her cheek. “Thank you, Brady.”

I lean forward, resting my head in my hands. “I’m doing this for you, Ives. Not for him. I can’t forgive Dad for what he did. At least, not yet. I’m not ready.” I glance over my shoulder at Mum. “I know this isn’t easy on either of you, and I’m sorry for being so selfish. I don’t want to upset you, Mum, and I don’t want you to feel guilty, Ives.” I clear my throat. “I’ll go to the Baptism, and I’ll be civil for their sake, but it’s going to take me a bit longer to accept them. I don’t feel good about it, but that’s all I’ve got right now.”

Ivy sniffs. “I get it. I do. But–”

I shake my head. “It’s where I’m at, Ives. I need you to respect that.” I get to my feet. “I’m going for a walk. I need to clear my head.” I grab my crutches and make my way to the back door.

I cross the yard to the path that leads to the beach. The summer weather has spilled into March, but the breeze coming in off the shore is cool against my warm skin. When I reach the sand, I kick off my shoes and bend down to peel off my socks.

Ever since I was a kid, whenever things got too much for me, I would slip away to the beach to sort through my thoughts. It’s only accessible from this single path, so it’s pretty much the best kept secret in Blue Haven. I love it because it feels like I’m in my own little paradise.

As I hobble down to the water’s edge, the sand is rough against my feet. Calm waves gently lap at the sand, and I stand close enough for my feet to get wet, but not too far in. The last thing I want is to be knocked on my ass.

I look down at my knee brace in disgust. It’s the reason I couldn’t help Harley Saturday night, and now I can’t even help out my best mates when they’re dealing with the scariest thing imaginable. Maribel is like a second mum to me. When Mum found out about Dad’s cheating... let’s just say, things got a bit tense at home. Maribel and Alfonso welcomed me and Ivy into their home whenever we needed. No judgement and no questions. Just lots of home cooked Italian food and plenty of support.

Maribel was diagnosed with stage three breast cancer four years ago, when Jordan and I were in year eleven. She found a lump in her breast, went to the doctor for a check-up, and was in hospital the following month for a double mastectomy. Unfortunately, the cancer had already spread to the lymph nodes near her collarbone and underarms. She started chemotherapy, which made her quite sick. That was when Jordan decided he wanted to go into medicine.

A realisation hits me. That was also when he started partying more.Shit. Has my best friend been screaming for help all this time?

After six months of intense treatments and strength that I’ve never witnessed before, Maribel was given the news that she was in remission. She is the nicest human being I’ve ever met. She’s the first person to do anything for anyone, regardless of who they are. I can’t believe she’s going through this again. It’s not fair.

I sigh as I pull my phone out of my pocket. I need to stop feeling sorry for myself and be there for my mate. The phone rings four times before Jordan’s voicemail sounds in my ear. “It’s Jordan. You know what to do.”

I hesitate before hanging up the phone. This isn’t the type of conversation you have over a voicemail. I check the time: it’s a quarter to nine. Lachy will be closing up the shop soon, so I dial his number.

“Hey man,” I say when he answers, going straight into what I need to say. “Ivy told me about your mum. I’m really sorry.”

“Thanks,” he replies with a deep sigh.

“I heard Jords is out on a date. Feel like some company tonight? Guy’s night.”

“That’d be great. I wasn’t looking forward to going home to an empty house.” I wince at the relief that coats his voice. I should’ve known what was going on. I should’ve been there for both of them. “I’ll pick you up in twenty.”

“See you then.”

As I hobble back up to the path, I think about what a selfish bastard I’ve been. I’ve been so caught up in everything that happened with Dad and Tashia that I ruined the best thing I had with the girl I’m in love with. I’ve ignored what was going on with my best mates, and I guilt tripped my little sister into feeling like she couldn’t have a relationship with our dad. I’ve made an effort for Ives and now I need to make it up to my mates. I need to be there for them.

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