Page 38 of Worth the Risk

“I wanted to kiss you, so I did. I’m sorry… I didn’t mean it to come out sounding like I only wanted to do it as payback. Yes, it was a knee-jerk reaction, but I did it more for me. I wanted to meet you as soon as I saw you in the kitchen. I’m usually much more reserved, but when I say my attraction to you was strong, I mean it, Leo. I don’t go around kissing random guys.”

He remains quiet while taking in my words, and I hope he understands where I’m coming from.

“That’s why I felt the way I did when I woke up on Sunday morning, and you were gone. I didn’t know how to navigate what I was thinking and feeling for you. I’ve only ever been with one man. I told you I’m not that type of girl, but there I was, going into your room and initiating sex with you. When I’m with you, I lose all sense of reason of who I am. So, when I think about that morning, maybe subconsciously, I was leaving to protect my heart and what I fear you could do to it if I allow myself to feel for you. I don’t want to go through heartbreak with you.”

I lay all my cards out on the table for him to see, and I’m curious what he might be thinking.

“This attraction you speak about, I get it. I feel it, and it confuses me too. You gave me your honesty, and I’ll give you mine. I’ve never been in a relationship, and I’ve never wanted one. Since the night I met you, you’re all I can think about. Sometimes, my thoughts of you consume me, and I don’t know how to feel about it. I want you, Kylie, but I can’t make you any promises. I’ve lived my life one way, with boundaries, and you’re making those lines blur. I don’t intend to ever hurt you intentionally, though.”

Can I risk my heart with him if he can’t make any promises?

He must see me debating this because he asks, “Are you willing to see where this goes and what we have between us?”

I recall his sister telling me that if he allows himself to care, he’s risking his heart, and I acknowledge that this is a risk for both of us.

I make up my mind. If he’s prepared to take the risk, I am too.

“Yes, I want to see where this goes. But I have one rule.” I stick up my pointer finger—this one is not debatable.

“I’m listening,” he says, amused.

“No other women. That is a hard limit for me. I just ask if the attraction diminishes for you that you tell me. It will hurt, but I’d rather you tell me first and be up-front.”

He nods. “Deal. May I ask the same of you?”

“Absolutely. There will be no other women for me either.” I giggle.

He laughs and says, “No othermen, Kylie.” He thinks for a moment, then adds, “Wait, are you trying to tell me you like women too?”

Snickering, I say, “No, I’m not. I was just trying to lighten the mood.”

“Okay, so no threesomes. Got it,” he jokes.

Has he had threesomes with women before?

Who am I kidding? I’m sure he’s way more experienced than me.The thought is unsettling.Will I keep him satisfied?Beth said that’s why James hooked up with her.Am I really lousy in bed?

Leo seemed to enjoy it. At least, I’m hoping he did.

“Have you done that before? Threesomes?”

He shrugs. “I have, but it’s not like it’s something I need. The opportunity was there, so I took it. I’ve not been a monk, but I’m telling you now, I made a promise to you, and I intend to keep it.”

A woman takes her turn at the piano, breaking into a soulful rendition of a song called “Un-break My Heart,” but I’m unsure of the artist. Leo puts his hand on the table, palm up. “Dance?”

Putting my palm in his hand, I allow him to lead me to the dance floor. He pulls me into his arms, and we sway to the music. I’m having a great time, but I can’t shake what Beth said, especially now that it’s in my head, and I know Leo is more experienced than me. I want to be with someone who will choose me over anyone else.Will he do that?

Sighing, I lay my head against his toned chest. I can only hope I’ll be enough and pray he doesn’t break my heart.

ChapterFourteen

Leo

Kylie has been quiet on the ride back to my place. Her mood seemed to shift as we danced.Has she changed her mind?I was hopeful when she said she’d try, but then she became distant.

Is she already planning to leave again?I glance at our linked hands on the console.Why would she hold my hand if this will be over before it started?These are unchartered waters for me. I never cared enough to worry about what a girl might be thinking about us.

After pulling into my driveway, I let out a quick exhale and go to open her door, take her hand, and help her out. I can’t stop touching her. I was never a hand-holding guy, but with Kylie, it’s instinctual.

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