Page 23 of Begin Again, Part 1

Nowhere fast, Liam thought as he stared at his hands. He still didn't know where Eden was. He'd searched everywhere for her and asked everyone he could think of. If her librarian dress and her pink lacy panties weren't buried deep in his closet, Liam would have thought he'd dreamed her up. But in his moments of hopelessness, when all he could do was drink himself to a stupor, Dave would assure him she was real. She was at his house. He didn't make her up.

"So?" Linda prodded.

Liam shook his head like he'd done in the past every time Eden came up. "Even if I find her, what good will it do?"

"Your trauma is linked to your experience with her," Linda reminded him. "Finding her is the key to helping you move past your trauma."

Liam sighed and checked his Rolex, an hour of his life gone. He stood up and buttoned up his blazer, wondering how many hours he'd wasted with Linda. Or how much more money she still planned to steal from him, only to dish out the same advice every time they met.

She left the room to check that the coast was clear. Nobody knew he was seeing a therapist. Not his friends, acquaintances, and certainly not his parents. Linda's reception area had to be empty for his arrival and departure. Nothing was more vulnerable than a CEO with perceived mental health issues. If the board found out and word got out, the media would have a field day. At Anderson Logistics, there was no such thing as any publicity being good publicity. Bad publicity was terrible for business and share prices.

Linda returned moments later and held the door open for him. "It's clear."

Liam walked past her without a word, annoyed he was still no closer to getting any real help. His security detail whisked him off in the service elevator to the black SUV waiting at the entrance.

"Mr Anderson, we should look at the CVs today," Mrs Gibson, or Gibby, as he called her, said as soon as he jumped in beside her. She was his father's assistant, but when he retired, Liam inherited her along with his big shoes. He pinched his nose in a futile attempt to drive off the start of a headache. "Do we have to?"

He didn't want another assistant, but Gibby had stayed six months past her retirement date. She couldn't postpone her move to the coast any longer.

"Yes, we do, darling." She patted his arm and handed him the stack of files.

He looked through the first ten, his hope diminishing fast the further down the pile he went.

He sat up at candidate #21, his palms sweating buckets and his heart racing in his chest. After two years of searching for her, who would have known she'd make her way back to him on her own? Liam stared at Eden McBride's photo on her CV. She looked as spirited as she was two years ago at Crush when she told him not to be a dick and wait in line like everyone else. No wonder he couldn't find her in any of the libraries he'd searched. She wasn't a librarian, even though she looked like one, with her thick black frame glasses, mousy brown hair, and questionable dress sense.

According to her CV, she was a children's book illustrator. Same difference. Both professions had a thing for books.

"I want her." Liam's eyes were dark with determination as he tapped her photo.

Gibby frowned. "Are you sure? She's a children's book illustrator with only three months experience as a junior assistant."

"But she worked for Van Holt Industries," Liam pointed out. They were a giant in the hospitality industry. And not that it mattered, but one of his closest friends, Levi, was the heir to the hotel chain.

"She was a temp!" Gibby insisted.

"So?" Liam glared at her. Was she questioning his judgement right now? He would have Eden, come hell or high waters.

"She doesn't have any experience!" His assistant hit her forehead with her palm, releasing an uneven breath.

"Doesn't matter," Liam retorted. "I want her."

Eden might not have the experience, but she'd learn. He'd teach her, starting with a few lessons on gratitude and never biting the hand that fed her. He was pretty sure he was using the idiom in the wrong context. But it didn't matter. What mattered was that she had used him and left him without so much as a goodbye. She broke him when she treated him like an unworthy one-night stand. Because of her, he hadn't had sex with any woman in two years. Because of her, out of fear of not being good enough, he panicked every time he had to perform.

"Are you questioning me right now?" Liam demanded as he pushed the stack of papers back at her.

"How will she manage your life when she's hardly set up a diary reminder?"

He stared at his assistant as if he was seeing her for the first time. Was that all she did? Set up diary reminders for him? If that was all her job entailed, her insane salary was not warranted. He made a mental note to review the salaries of all two thousand employees at headquarters.

"How hard can it be to set up a diary reminder?" He mused, tapping his cheek with his finger. If Eden drew mommy and daddy rabbits for toddlers, working the Microsoft suite should be easy.

Gibby ran a hand impatiently through her short afro. "That's not all she has to do! She must manage your daily schedule. Then there's the reporting, the minutes taking, the prepping of your presentations. I haven't even touched your personal life. She'll have to remember all the important dates. Birthdays, anniversaries, etc., run your errands and escort you to all kinds of events. That's just the tip of the iceberg, and she has to do it all on five hours of sleep, sometimes less."

Liam fell silent for a long time, mulling over her words. Finally, he asked, "Am I so helpless?"

"That's not what I meant," Gibby backtracked, shaking her head.

"It sounds like I need a full-time babysitter," Liam said. He never thought about how dependent he was on his assistants before. But now that she'd brought it up, he felt strangely uncomfortable.