Page 76 of Just For Her

“If I could take it all back with Tove…”

“What do you mean?”

Kayla shrugged. “I don’t know.” There were too many trains of thought for that statement.If I could take back-breaking her heart, I would in an instant.Tove didn’t deserve however she felt right now.Betrayed, insulted…But if Kayla could take back ever meeting Tove? If she could take back getting involved with the Fredrikssons on her first fateful day in Bend?It’s true, what Chrissy says.Kayla couldn’t step out into a rainy street without bumping into a Fredriksson. Or their car, in her instance.

She would. She would take it all back if it meant absolving Tove of her shame and heartbreak.

At the same time, Kayla had to take care of herself. Hurting Tove burned a ton of bridges in Bend, and she might be pressured to quit her job because of Nils’s co-ownership or because it was a popular hangout spot for the younger members of the family. Kayla might have a scarlet G on her back. Maybe it wouldn’t mean much to the new money crowd that flew in and out of Bend every week, but there was no denying that many people of means would not touch her now. Not even for a one-night stand that got her, at most, a free dinner at Giuseppe’s.

In that case, how would she financially protect her ass?

A hundred grand would go a long way.

“If I go the Aunt Kiersten route,” Kayla said after finally sipping her coffee. “I’ll need your help. That woman is scary as shit.”

She hated asking even more of her friend, yet Kayla swore this was the last time. There was life to conquer, but she needed money to do it.

Kayla was not surprised to find a box of her things waiting on Huey and Chrissy’s doorstep. Over the next few days, more things showed up in the early hours of the morning. There were no notes left. Not even a curt request to come to get the rest if anything was missing. Kayla understood the hint well. Even if Tove were home, she would not answer the door.

Still, didn’t feel good, did it?

“She folded your clothes so neatly.” Chrissy peered into one of the boxes while Kayla went through another, putting some things away in a drawer and tossing others into a pile. “If it were me, I’d dump everything in there, not giving a flying fig about how it looked.”

“That’s Tove for you.” Saying that made Kayla hold back a tiny wave of tears. She had promised not to cry any more than she had the day everything ended. It was the same brave face she put on after her mother died, and after she entered her first sugar baby relationship out of pure necessity. Sometimes, things had a purpose beyond her desires. “Considerate even in a breakup. Honestly, probably couldn’t help herself.”

Kayla tentatively returned to work after not hearing anything from her boss. Likewise, she said nothing about her sudden breakup as she clocked in that Thursday and got to work taking orders, filling beers, and collecting tips from locals and business travelers alike. Ski season had given way to hiking and rafting, and every other table was full of tourists carrying bags from the local souvenir shops. EveryTRUDY’S GIFTSlogo reminded Kayla of Tove, who had confessed her childhood obsession with making tourists happy with kitschy gifts and tchotchkes that may or may not get used back home.

Of course, there were other reminders of Tove everywhere. Simply knowing that the “F” in the corner of the brewery’s POS system stood for (Nils) Fredriksson tore Kayla up enough to take more breaks than was allowed. The newspapers left behind on some tables were open to the wedding announcement of Elias and Isabella, a “lovely” couple who looked too much like Tove for Kayla to bear. She always snatched those papers off their tables and vigorously scrubbed the laminate beneath if the busboy was off duty.

She was angry. At herself. At the situation. At everything she should have done instead of pretending everything was right.

Yet the biggest reminder of Tove came in the faces of her cousins. The young and spoiled brats still arrived every other week to loudly declare who they were sleeping with and where they were traveling (while leaving almost no tips.) Solemn uncles and aunts who deigned to eat there solely because Nils partially owned it always wanted to sit on the patio overlooking the river. Kayla had to navigate large dogs and entangled leashes to get to the Fredrikssons who reserved tables in the far corners of the patios.

None of them recognized her. Not even Nils, who came by one slow Sunday afternoon.

That one surprised her the most, although she supposed his aloof demeanor should have clued her in that she was inconsequential to a man like him.We’ve formally met, though…At the family reunion, when his damn Gustav-descended son was usurped by Uncle Thomas’s pregnancy announcement.

The way he looked at her as if she were not there, though, was more infuriating than anything else Kayla experienced those past two weeks.

More and more she was convinced that she needed to get away from Bend.Hood River is sounding nice.At the same time, Grady had mentioned snagging a single-family house to rent in Sherwood. One with three bedrooms.“The boys are still young enough to share a room for now, you know…”He had insinuated. If this was his way of apologizing for telling Tove everything, well… it was working. Every day, Kayla thought more about peacing out at the end of September if not before. But without a good job like this one lined up in southern Portland, she needed something to get by. Besides, she damn well deserved a vacation all to herself at some point.Maybe I’ll go to Seattle and check out the sugar daddy scene there…She merely joked about that, because nothing sounded worse right now.

Because the more she contemplated “moving on” to the next relationship, the more she wanted to throw up.

She had yet to contact Aunt Kiersten, and she knew time was running short. Eventually, word would reach the matriarch that Kayla and Tove had split without any intervention on her behalf.Can’t let her cheap out like that.Yet every time she prepared to ring the woman or show up at her house in Fredrik, she got cold feet. It was so… final. So dirty.

Her break over, she collected her bearings and returned to work with her customer service face and voice completely on lock. She saw a man sitting at one of her tables and thought nothing about approaching him with a glass of water.

“Hey! I’m Kayla. I’ll be your…”

Oskar looked up from the menu he brusquely perused. “Hi, Kayla. I’m Dr. Oskar.”

She placed the water on the table and kept a respectful distance. “Hello, Oskar. Don’t see you around here often.”

“I’m not a big fan of the brew here. I’m a mead guy. You might have heard.” He winked.

“Uh-huh. What can I do you for?”

“To be honest? I was hoping to chat with you. Privately. Maybe when your shift is over?”

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