Page 84 of Just For Her

Kayla backed down. “Oh. Forgive me for thinking otherwise.”

“Sheesh. You only see things in terms of money, huh? What made you decide to go after me, anyway? Did you think I’d be so easy?”

“You want the truth?”

“The truth would be nicefor once.”

Kayla lowered her arms. Her downcast look only brought more attention to her cheekbones and the subtle outline of her lips. Tove forced herself to look away.

“I came to Bend to look for a partner who could take care of me. This is true. What my brother left out iswhy.Look, Tove, I don’t have a lot going for me. Nothing but my looks and some guts. I grew up at a disadvantage and was left to fend for myself, although my brother did his best. I fell into sugar babying because it paid the bills that waitressing couldn’t. But I’m getting older! My mom… she died from complications of MS. What if I get MS? Who’s gonna take care of me if I’m wheelchair-bound by forty like my mom?”

“I’mfifty,” Tove reminded her.

“Yeah, and my mom didn’t make it that far! I’m one of the first people to know that anything can happenanytime. I don’t want to be a burden to my brother anymore. He’s got enough to worry about with two kids. So, I told my friend that if I could move in with her for less than a year, I’d be married. Sure, I was excited to learn about your family and have my first day start with your cousin and me. I had every intention of going after him. I even thought about it after you and I slept together. Except his wife was back in town and… now I know that was Kiersten’s work. She had heard about me and bribed Polly to come back because she was a ‘known quantity,’ unlike me. By that time, I already had you mildly hooked, so why not?” Kayla sighed at the end of her spiel. “Of course, I never meant to hurt you. In a perfect world, you would never have known any of this. When we decided to elope, I was genuinely happy. I had finally found someone who liked me for more than how young I was or how I looked. You made me feel like a whole person, Tove. Hurting you was the last thing I wanted. I would have been a great wife to you.” She wetted her lips for a few seconds, taking the time to half turn away from Tove. “Even if you still dumped me, I at least wish you would have let me explain myself.”

Tove did not filter the words coming out of her mouth. “You lied to me. Do you know how used I felt? How stupid? There I was, on my wedding day, and your brother, whom I’dnevermet before had to tell me who you were. That’s how worried he was about the situation.”

“What the hell did Grady know! He’d never seen me with a woman before!”

“Yeah, about that. You lied about being bi, didn’t you?”

“I… I don’t know…” Kayla shrugged. “It’s true that I never thought about dating women. Our first night together… well, that was my first time with another woman.”

Unbelievable.Tove had half a mind to die on the spot.I don’t think I’ve ever been another woman’s first lesbian love affair before.Every partner before Kayla, to Tove’s knowledge, had been with another.

“What else did you lie about?” she demanded. “Are you even a vegetarian?”

Kayla was pale.

“I don’t believe it.Whywould you lie about that?”

“Because I wanted you to like me! I wanted you to think I was perfect for you!” Kayla tossed her hands into the air, almost knocking over the display of Bjorn Fredriksson’s wildflower treatise. “You make this sound way more sinister than it was. For me, it was survival, but along the way… I really did care for you. I still do. Why do you think I’ve gone through all this trouble? It’s been two months, and I still think about you. That’s never happened to me after a breakup. I’ve usually moved on by now, assuming I liked the guy. From you? Something tethers me to this God-forsaken town because it sure isn’t the rest of your family. Between your aunt’s weirdly bigoted bullshit and your cousin’s wandering hands…they’rethe ones who have made me feel like a piece of meat. Believe it or not, as much as I’d like ‘the good life,’ I also want an honest life. If I must run this store by myself come the start of the new year, so be it! I’ll even ignore you down the street if that’s what you want! I’ll be cordial in public, but that’s it.”

“Do you know what this is doing to me right now?” Tove hadn’t realized until then that she was yanking on the collar of her dressy tank top.No wonder I can barely breathe.The front of her throat had space, but the back of her neck strained beneath the weight of her silky threads. “I was having a nice morning! Minding my own damn business and moving on! Then all of a sudden…this?” She gestured to the store around her… and the woman before her. “It’s like a bomb has gone off in my head!”

Kayla bent down to pick up one of the books that had fallen to the floor. “I’m sorry. I knew you’d be shocked, but I didn’t mean to upset you. I don’t expect an answer right now. I’m still trying to figure a few things out myself, especially since I’m working as a waitress until… I don’t know. I’m in no hurry, Tove. You tell me what you want when you’re ready, and I’ll be around. Your family can’t scare me off. They never could, and they tried.”

“What’s that mean?”

“Your aunt. When we went to Hood River, she took me aside and offered me the hundred thousand if I broke up with you and left town forever. That’s why I knew if I went to her before she found out about our actual breakup, she’d give me the money. The only problem is… well, part of the deal was leaving within thirty days. That time is long gone. I’ve kept a low profile, but I don’t know how much longer I have before she sends the dogs after me.”

On one hand, Tove didn’t think that was her concern. On the other? “I can’t deal with this right now. I’ve got appointments this afternoon. I’m…” She turned to the door. Trudy had backed away but still lurked on the sidewalk.I can’t talk to you either.She was surrounded by people with ulterior motives.

The door clanged shut behind her. Trudy turned to her with a grin, but that smile quickly fell as Tove hustled down the sidewalk. It wasn’t until both Kayla and Trudy called after her that she realized she had left her purse on the shop floor.

She was inclined to leave it all behind.

The microwave dinged the inglorious arrival of Tove’s cooked dinner. The Marie Callender’s pot pie had already bubbled through the slit carved into the crust. Tove stayed on her couch, slowly munching the potato chips that had already hit her in the salt spot.

Nemo sat before the kitchen counter, staring at the microwave, his favorite thing to do shortly after the buzz and dings faded into the background sounds of the TV playing Doogie Howser reruns.

Life was so much simpler in the ‘90s.Tove plopped the bag on the couch and forced herself up. Crumbs fell from her pullover. Chance got up from the back of the couch and stretched, his yawn the size of the hole in Tove’s brain. There was absolutely nothing going on upstairs. It would have been bliss had it happened under different circumstances.

Eventually, Tove dragged herself to the microwave and stared at the simmering gravy that had splattered onto the microwave plate. She licked her dry lips, but not because she was hungry. The only reason Tove had made it this far at eight in the evening was because she knew she had to eat something besides potato chips.

She plopped the tray onto a small plate and fished for a fork. Both of her cats lost interest in what she did – until she accidentally burned herself on the scalding hot gravy, sending her straight to the sink where she ran cold water under her finger.

This is going great.The one thing Tove couldn’t stop thinking about was that she had woken up in a relatively good mood that morning!

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