Page 6 of Sugar Rush

"I thought he was dead."

Arkan winced, and I could have punched myself in the face. He knew he was dead; he'd been his guard when the man was killed. I kissed his jaw in silent apology, mentally calling myself all the names under the sun.

"Koa's sister," he clarified quietly, his throat bobbing. "We've been monitoring the site around the black armoury, but so far Eidolon hasn't gone anywhere near it. The second he does, he'll have an army of wraiths around him."

At the memory of why Arkan left us in the throne room, my stomach swooped. "Ark, I—"

"Don't," he interrupted, something cold and brutal in his soul. Like the complete absence of light. "You were right. I swore to myself I'd never again be cowardly like the night of Koa's death, but I left you."

"To get help," I argued, but all the fire had left my voice. And my arms, I noticed. I couldn't have even said when my magic and anger bled away. "You gothelp,and your wraiths scared Eidolon off. Who knows what he'd have done if you hadn't brought backup."

Arkan caught a strand of my blue-purple hair, winding it around his fingers. "If I'd stayed, X would never have been taken."

I reached up, framing his pale face between my hands, wincing at the blood under my fingernails. "You got Joseph out. Yousavedhim. I was just—being a fucking bitch when I said that. I didn't mean it, Arkan. Not one bit. I was scared and broken and lashing out. I don't blameyou,and I shouldn't have taken my panic out on you."

I caressed his sharp cheekbones with the pads of my thumbs, wishing I could time travel and undo the last ten minutes. I was hurt but I shouldn’t have made that hurt into a weapon. Not against Arkan, never him.

"Who else can you take it out on?" he asked, a bitter laugh colouring his voice and sending a new crack through my heart. Shit, his mask was cracking. "Everyone's gone thanks to me."

"Thanks toEidolon,"I corrected. Arkan’s pale eyes flickered, his shadows rippling through the garden. "If you weren't here now, if he'd taken you, too…" I gave him the world's saddest attempt at a wry smile. "All this glowing sanity you see in me would be gone. That version of me would makethisAvie look like the poster child for mental health."

When he didn't speak, I breathed,"Iwas in the room, too. I was there when he weakened Dev and gutted Taj. Can we at least share the blame?"

Arkan glanced up at the red sky above the garden and nodded stiffly.

"Can you forgive me?" I whispered, my heart racing so fast I went dizzy. What if he said no?

His stare snapped down to me, and he blinked rapidly. "You're scared, princess. You're already forgiven."

My bottom lip wobbled. For once I didn't try to hide my emotions.

He folded me back into his arms without comment, expelling a rough breath. I hugged him so hard it couldn’t have been comfortable, but he didn’t complain.

I was forgiven, but the scars I'd given him wouldn't quickly fade. Oreverfade.

"I love you," I whispered. Fuck, it was hard to say those words, to carve open a piece of myself and hand it over to him. But it was true; my love was so violent and fierce and unending, it refused to be contained.

"And I love you," he replied without hesitation.

I wanted to be a better mate to him, but was that even possible with my world one second away frompermanentlycrashing down around me?

Taj clung to life by his claws—what happened when those claws slipped?

3

Aknife bit deep into my thigh, and the teeth I'd gritted for two hours were ripped apart by a scream. Pain exploded as bright as fire through my body, shredding all my nerves until I was some fucked up combination of numb and excruciated. I bucked, trying to escape the pain, but cold leather straps held me down for my torturer's blade as he curved and angled the tip, carving deep, precise lines.

Another wave of pain forced a scream up my throat—

But all at once, the sound cut out. All pain fled. Everything was quiet. As still as death.

This time when my body arched, I flew up—and into a pair of arms.

"Avie, my Aveline, wake up. Wake up, princess."

I choked on my next breath, my head reeling as I processed Arkan squeezing me into a rough hug, the hospital still and silent around us. There was no torturer with a knife, and my thigh wasn't weeping blood, shutting down all my senses with pain.

"Ark, oh god—! Ark, I think—"