Page 141 of Run Away Home: Tempered

I pull the sweatshirt on over my tee, and I walk past Danny’s room. His door is closed. I know he’s in there. He just doesn’t want to see me.

When do I tell Peter? Is he going to believe that it’s his? It has to be. Tristian and I use condoms. How is he going to take it?

I take my time going to the kitchen, picking at the cuticles of my hands. Peter’s sitting at the small table, looking over some papers. Maybe something with Danny’s school?

I walk by and open the fridge. I haven’t said much to him since I’ve been home. He’s said nothing to me. I don’t know how to tell him the news. He hasn’t been in a good mood lately. I’m starting to think he won’t be very happy about it at all. I grab a string cheese from the fridge door. Maybe I should start the conversation lightly...

“Did you have a good day at work?”

“Excuse me?” He sounds very impatient.

“Uh...work, this morning. Was it—”

“I didn’t go to work.”

“Oh. Where were you?”

“Try court.”

“Court? Why?”

He picks up the papers in front of him. “I guess, according to New York State—and, I’m sure, every other fucking state in this country—it’s not considered ‘safe’ to have a minor in a home where there’s the presence of drug abuse. Makes a lot of sense, huh?”

Yeah, I know. I heard all that at the hospital after they told me... Yikes. Double yikes. I didn’t even think about Danny.

“Oh.” I try to walk out of the kitchen. This is not a good time.

“You realize I’m going to lose custody of Danny.”

I stop walking. “Sorry. I hope not—”

He stands. “Do you think ‘sorry’ is a magic fucking word? That ‘sorry’ takes away all of the bad you’ve caused in the world? I wish! I wish ‘sorry’ could change a lot of fucking things, but that’s not how it works.”

“I guess Danny—”

“Don’t talk about Danny. He’s not going anywhere. It’s been settled.”

“The court ruled in our favor?”

What a relief. Maybe this won’t be so bad. We can work on it together before the baby’s born.

He laughs. “‘Our?’ The court said either you go, or he goes. Guess who’s going?”

I stare blankly, feeling myself start to sweat.

“When I’m at work, he’s staying at Matt’s. That’s happening until you’re gone. You have seven days.” He stands and approaches me. “Get gone,” he whispers in my ear.

“Peter... I have nowhere to go!”

“That sucks.” He walks past me. “Go to DSS. They’ll put you somewhere.”

“You can’t make me leave!” Tears rush to my eyes.

I’m getting kicked out again, but this time there’s no Melissa. There’s no back-up plan, and...I’m pregnant. I look at him. I really, really look at him. I can’t read his face. He loves me, doesn’t he? He wouldn’t abandon me, would he?

“You’re right,” he says. “Come here.”

He opens his arms. I run into him and sob against his shoulder.

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