Page 45 of A Million Pieces

She only stayed a week, needing to get back home to her family, but promised she’d be back after the baby was born.

Tracey and Austin pleaded no contest and now we don’t have to face them in trial, thank God. I knew I could do it, but I didn’t want Tripp to have to face her. Neither of them will be out any time soon. Hopefully when they get out, they’ll leave and never come back.

Focusing back on Tripp, I cheer as he kicks the ball toward the goal. Hank grabs me, pulling me to his side. “He’s so good,” I tell him.

“Yeah babe, he is. How are you feeling? That chair isn’t very comfortable.” He rubs his large hand over my belly and the baby kicks.

“It’s worth it. He looks so happy out there.” I tell him honestly. He wraps his arms around my waist, and we watch our boy chase after the ball. Tripp will be so ready for a nap by the time we get home, which is great because I’m in desperate need for a nap myself.

After the game, which was a tie one to one, and orange slices, we head back to the house. I get Tripp changed and he pats his bed once he lies down. “Lay with me.” There is nothing I wouldn’t do for this sweet little boy.

My belly presses into his, making us laugh, especially since the baby moves. He is always fascinated by my belly. It does look like there is an alien in there moving around.

“Does it hurt?” he asks.

I shake my head. “No baby, it doesn’t at all.”

He nods and then grabs my hand, and we fall asleep.

***

“Today’s my last day, but I want you all to have a great rest of the year and I’ll bring the baby to come see you before school is out.” The substitute comes to stand next to me. “Mrs. Johnson is excited to teach you all.”

“Guys, I’m so excited to be here with you for the rest of the year while Miss Burns has her baby.”

The kids hug me one by one and the janitor comes in to help me carry my things out to the car. I’ll admit I get a little teary-eyed thinking about missing the rest of my kids’ school year. After getting the car loaded, I climb inside and make my way across town.

I feel a little twinge in my belly. That’s not unusual this close to the end. Making my way across town, I pull into the driveway. I grab my bag and head toward the front door. Letting myself inside, I drop my bag by the door.

It’s so quiet without Tripp here, he’s with Judy and Mick today. In the kitchen, I grab a banana and take a seat at the breakfast bar. I’ve been thinking about telling Hank I want to adopt Tripp. I love that boy to pieces and would move mountains for him if he needed it.

I’m not naïve to think that Tracey abandoning him won’t have lasting effects on him, but I will love him and do my best with him. Of course, that’s if he even wants me to be his mom. The baby gives a little wiggle, little because I’m sure they’re out of the room, or at least it feels like they are.

Swallowing the last bite of my banana, I head into the bedroom and lay down and wrap myself around the body pillow Hank bought me. My jaw cracks as I yawn and I sink into dreamland.

Cooing pulls me from my sleep. I climb out of bed and stretch my arms above my head, groaning because of my sore body. On soft feet, I make my way into the hall and the cooing gets louder. What is that? I look down and see I’m still pregnant.

I freeze at the door because this isn’t Hank’s, I mean our home. It’s the home Hank and I shared when we were married. Looking up and down, tears fill my eyes because it’s the door to Gage’s nursery. The cooing starts up again and butterflies take flight in my belly. Tears burn my eyes and I grab the doorknob with my shaking hand.

Pushing it open, sunlight spills in from the window. I walk toward the crib and when I reach it I can’t bring myself to look. What am I going to see? Taking a deep breath, I tip my head forward. I count to myself, “One, two, three.”

Opening my eyes, I cry out. My sweet little boy is lying in his crib, waving his arms and legs. Is he real? Is this my sweet baby boy? I reach out and touch him. He’s soft and warm. Do I dare pick him up?

An ache builds in my chest. I need to hold him in my arms. Picking him up, I begin to cry. His scent wraps around me as I rock him in my arms. He nuzzles against me and I grab his little hand, bringing it to my lips.

God, he even feels the same. Kissing it over and over, I savor every second of this. I cradle him in my arms and he looks up at me with those beautiful eyes. “H-hi baby boy. I’ve missed you so much.”

I bring him to my nose, inhaling his sweet baby scent. His little hand reaches out and grabs my nose, making me smile.

“I promise I am never, ever going to forget you. We love you, my sweet boy.”

He coos at me, waving his arms and legs. I begin to cry as he suddenly fades away.

Flying up in bed, I cry softly. I bring my hands up to my face and I swear I can smell him. The dream felt so real, he felt real. Every dream of him I’ve had, have all been nightmares. This was the first that filled me with joy.

Gage will always be in my heart. I take a deep breath and push myself up and as I walk to the bathroom, I feel a trickle running down my leg. “Oh my god.” Whispering, I waddle fast to the bathroom to clean myself up.

I make my way back to our bedroom when there is a bigger gush, followed by a contraction. Taking a slow, deep breath, I wait for the pain to pass. Changing my clothes, I head out into the living room. As I’m reaching for my phone, I start having another contraction. Shit, I went fast with Gage, and it appears it is happening again.

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