Page 29 of Darkest Heart

Thunder boomed, shaking the ground. The drizzle turned to thick drops, slathering the streets wet. I moved into the doorway, but I wanted to brave the storm alone. I hadn’t felt anything from her since that shot of terror crawled through me. The distance in our connection was far more terrifying than anything else.

Erianna patted my back, brushing the edge of my wing. “Tomorrow, Seb,” she said as I hesitated by the door. “She will be okay, but we have to do this together. Else we won’t stand a chance.” She pulled off my jacket and placed it in my hands. “Trust me.”

I exhaled shakily, following her to the spiral steps. “I do.”

TEN

Olivia

The poison lulled me into a deep sleep, weakening my every movement until lifting my head off the pillow was a chore. I fluttered my eyes open to the bright room, sensing someone with me. Flicking my gaze to the window, I noticed the drapes were open, then glanced at the chair. “Astor,” I croaked groggily.

He rocked back and forth, his knees pulled together, fingers intertwined. From the mess of his honey-locks and dirt scrapes over his arms, I assumed he’d been in some kind of scrape. Any wounds would have already healed. He stood, his small nose scrunching as he stared down at me with a hatred I’d never seen before. He stepped slowly, boards creaking under his heavy boots as he reached the side of the bed. His silence was worse than if he had screamed at me. His breath hit my nose, a potent stench of blood from his last feed building the nausea in my stomach. “You’re coming with me.”

“No. I’m waiting on?”

“Oh, I know what you’re waiting for. The decision from the council. Your little stunt cost me everything. They almost killed me. You made them think everything I told them was lies. Their trust was all I had. You could have gotten me killed.”

“You did this to yourself.”

He shook his head, his manic eyes darting from me to the window and back again. “No, I had no choice.”

“We all have a choice. You made the wrong ones. That’s not on me.”

“You know what, fuck you, Liv!” He pointed a bloody finger at me. He must have fed before coming up. “I told you everything and you still think I’m the villain. Okay, fair enough, we kidnapped you, but don’t act as if I didn’t give you another choice.” He lowered his voice, but the quiver of rage remained. “I offered to marry you. But you refused and married Sebastian instead. I would have protected you.”

I let out a sigh as I contemplated the audacity of this guy. “Look at where we are, then say that with a straight face.”

He rubbed his forehead, ironing out the wrinkles. “You’ve put me in a difficult position. I can’t believe I ever loved you.”

“Love.” I laughed. “You don’t know the meaning of the word.”

“That’s not true.” He paced over the floorboards, listening to the low chatter of mortals below. Blowing out a tense breath, he sat back on the chair. Lowering his hand to his knees, he squeezed tightly. “Everyone always thought I was useless or the bad guy.”

“I mean, with reason, Astor.”

He rubbed his knees, attempting to soothe himself. “No, not in the guild. I was an employee, just like Draven.”

His name shot a pang of grief through my chest, followed by a burning rage that would never quench until Kalon was dead. “Even then, you were manipulative! I was just too blinded to see it.”

His honey-brown eyes widened, tears glossing over them. “That’s not true. Draven, your mom, Adrian. Not one of them thought I was good enough, and all I did was try. I was never promoted by any of them, and you expect me to feel bad for selling them out? They happily sent their own into enemy territory, knowing damn well they wouldn’t come back.”

“I cannot listen to another sob story.” I pressed my fingers against my temples, reorientating myself. “Look, you got sick, and it sucked. I get it. I grieved right alongside you when it happened, but then you hurt me back when all I did was care for you. I was on your side, and you might not believe it, but the guild was, too. You sold us out.”

“I never told them who you were, just your mom.”

I gritted my teeth. “Yes, that’s so much better. I mean, it wasn’t hard for anyone to figure out who I was. If it wasn’t for Sebastian, Erianna and Zach, Kalon would have killed me the second he found me.”

“I wouldn’t have let that happen,” he whispered, and I actually think he believed his own lies. “Whispers of your whereabouts circled in the immortal dens, anyway. Your mom could have taken you to another kingdom, to start a different life. But she couldn’t help herself. She enjoyed the glory the guild gave her. She wanted to stay with her friends, and she put you all in danger. The vampires came for you, for her. Not for the rest of the guild. They died because your mom was too stubborn to leave and thought she could stop an attack before it happened. Ravena wanted me to find out more. I was going to die anyway, so why not have me killed off, in the chance I might find out some information that’ll help them?”

My heart fluttered. Normally, I wouldn’t believe a word that came out of his mouth, but there was truth in his eyes, too strong to deny. While I didn’t swallow it all, it did resonate, and honestly, sounded like something my mom would do. “If you’re telling the truth, which would be a first,” I added bitterly, “then it doesn’t matter. You still betrayed them, and you knew what you were signing yourself up for when you joined. People always die when serving their kingdom.”

“I was nineteen, Liv! Wake the fuck up.” He shook his head. “I betrayed them, but they did it to me first. They didn’t care about my family or anyone I loved. It didn’t matter what my death would do to my mom. All they cared about was protecting both of you.”

“They did care.”

“No, and Draven didn’t either. There was so much I couldn’t tell you before. Things I wish I could have said, but I didn’t. When I found Nightshade, I researched them. Instead of allowing death to take me, I came up with an offer. A deal that would save my life and wouldn’t hurt you in the process. I never gave them your name. Let me ask you something, Liv.”

“What?”

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