Page 55 of Ever After

My heart is palpitating out of my chest. My cheeks get warm. “How cute. You’re jealous.”

“How is that cute? It shows my true feelings for you.”

“It just is.” I lean over and kiss him on the lips.

The enormous mountains that surround Utah intrigue Jay. So, I rented a side-by-side to take a drive up the mountains and enjoy being on the mountain instead of only looking at them. Also wanted him to look down at the entire valley from on top. The fall leaves have changed to their vibrant colors of red, yellow, and burnt orange. I found a private renter online. It was convenient to rent from him because he lives closer to the mountain, and we could take off from his house and go right up.

Jay drives us up the mountain carefully. I told him he didn’t need to be that careful and he could enjoy the ATV. He said he was enjoying the scenery and didn’t want to miss anything. I think he was trying to be safe with me. I keep catching him smiling every so often, and I’m just happy he’s enjoying this.

We reach the top of the mountain and find a parking spot. I open the door and go around the back of the ATV and grab the blanket and pillows I brought for a picnic I planned. I wouldn’t tell Jay what I had in the bags I brought, but it was only obvious.

“Can you grab the bags?” I ask.

He shakes his head and reaches for the bags. We walked a few feet away from where we parked.

“This looks like a suitable spot. The ground is flat and there aren’t a lot of rocks,” he says.

“Okay,” I agree.

As I lay the blanket down and place the pillows behind us, I grab the bags from Jay and begin arranging everything. I pull out a charcuterie board from one bag and begin unwrapping it. Some parts of the ride got bumpy; I’m glad nothing fell out. Reaching over to the second bag, I pull out a bottle of champagne and plastic flute glasses I found at the store. I didn’t trust bringing glass ones. From the corner of my eye, I see Jay watching me.

“Do you like it?” I ask.

“It’s perfect.” He scoots closer to me and grabs the champagne bottle to open it. The loud pop echoes through the entire mountain. I hope no one thinks it was a gunshot. I didn’t think about how loud it would be and how much it would echo. He pours the champagne while I hold the flutes for him.

The quietness of the mountains is calming. It’s a great place to come and recharge. We came around the time the sun would set so we could watch the sunset together. We lay down in each other's arms, taking in the silence while the night sky falls.

I keep contemplating where we go from here or I should say where I go from here. I have someone who wants me, someone that I don’t know if I should give myself fully to.

Lia: Will you go on a double date with me tonight?

Me: With who?

Lia: Your lover boy, who else?

Me: Is that a good idea?

Lia: It’s not like this guy will know who you are. We can go somewhere no one will see us or recognize us.

Me: Why can’t you go on this date alone?

Lia: This girl at work is setting me up with her cousin. I never met him before. He’s been having a hard time dating. If you ask me, he sounds weird.

Me: Why didn’t you say no?

Lia: I tried. She suckered me into it. I started feeling bad about all the dating stories she was telling me about him. My big ass mouth said, “It’s probably the girls he’s dating. He doesn’t sound weird. I would go out on a date with him!”

Lia: (Face palm) Sooo now she set us up. She came into the office bouncing up and down, so excited to tell me he agreed to go on a date with me. I didn’t realize she took it seriously, and I felt too bad to tell her no.

The shitmy best friend gets herself into amazes me. I chuckle a little, thinking about the face she made when she found out her coworker set her up. This is Jay’s last night here. The weekend flew by in a blink of an eye. We’ve been enjoying each other’s company—even without sex. After the last weekend we spent together, I can see the walls he built for himself. I feel bad I’m part of the reason for those walls. I don’t blame him after all he’s been through.

Lia: Do not ignore me!

I stare at Lia's text, wondering what to say. The bathroom door opens up, and Jay comes out in a towel wrapped around his waist with water dripping from his hair down to his chest. Just looking at him, I don’t know how I’ve held myself back. All I can think about is throwing him on the bed and showing him how much I love his body. I’ve held myself back because I know I need to respect him. But God damn, this makes it hard. Maybe he’ll let me try. He’s probably playing hard to get.

He stands still as I walk up to him, eying his chest. He’s staring at me while I roam my hand up and down his body, seeing how far he’ll let me go. I reach his sex lines and make my way down further. The second I reach the towel, it drops to the floor. He grabs my hand, pulling me out of this sexual trance. I look up at Jay. He shakes his head at me.

“You can’t have this until I have you all to myself.” He bends down and picks up his towel and wraps himself back up. He slowly comes back up and kisses me on the forehead and walks away to this suitcase. I stand, shocked. He is playing hard to get. Another ping comes through my phone, and I look over at the bed and see my phone light up. I turn around and face Jay, staring at my phone. “It’s just Lia.”

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