Page 35 of Ever After

Jay: I know our situation isn’t normal. What’s normal nowadays, though? I’m happy with you, and I hope you felt the same with me. This is the first time I’ve ever felt this way with someone. I can talk to you about anything. I don’t have to worry about being judged. You accept me for who I am, and I accept you for who you are. Married or not.

Jay: Okay, I know the marriage part sounds bad. It’s not ideal to meet someone while you’re still married. Given what your douchebag ex did to you, I don’t think you should worry about how you look. You are selfless, caring, and loveable. I’m glad you took my chair at the bar. I never thought I would meet someone that would make me feel the way you made me feel. Your presence alone comforted me in ways I never would have imagined existed. I was scared as hell to meet someone new because I didn’t want to get hurt again. But I met you and here I am. I want you.

My eyes tear up. This is the second time I tear up for Jay. Losing him feels so different than losing Aiden. I don’t know if I should write Jay back or not. He has comforted me a lot this past week. Something I would have never expected a guy to do. I don’t even know what to say to him.

Me: Hi Jay! I made it home safe. We started this out not knowing where it was going to go. I never expected for it to go in this direction. You deserve someone who is not in the mess I’m in. I wish I wasn’t in this situation, and I know ours isn’t ideal. You don't deserve to be caught up in my life. I need to figure it out. I will always remember the time we had. You came into my life when I least expected it. Thank you for being the comfort I needed.

I press send and right away I see the three little dots.

Jay: I’m not giving up on us.

A dull pain shoots through my chest after reading his messages. I never expected us to feel this way about each other in such a short amount of time. As nervous as I am, I don’t want to spill my feelings to Jay too much since I don’t know what will happen and I don’t want to complicate things.

I scroll down and open the messages from Aiden but stop myself from reading them. Not feeling up to reading his right now. I’ll text him tomorrow so we can meet up and talk about everything.

I have beenawake for a few hours now and haven’t gotten out of bed. It’s already the afternoon. I wish my life would fix itself, so I don’t have to deal with it. I grab my phone and text Aiden.

Me: I’m home. Let me know when you can come over and talk?

Aiden: I’m glad you texted me. Where have you been? I’ve stopped by the house every day and you weren’t home. You weren’t at your moms. None of your friends knew where you were.

I roll my eyes and ignore what he’s asking.

Me: When can you come over and talk?

Aiden: I can be there in a few hours. Are you going to ignore my question?

Me: You lost the right to know where and who I’ve been with. I’ll see you in a few.

He doesn’t reply.

A few hours later, I hear a knock on the door. Is it Aiden? Why didn’t he just walk in? I open the door and it’s Aiden with a bouquet of flowers. “What are these?” I ask.

“They’re for you,” he says, handing them to me.

“I don’t want them.”

“Lilah, I’m trying.”

Ignoring the flowers, I turn my back to him and sit on the couch. He walks to the kitchen and starts putting the flowers into a vase.

“Where have you been?” Aiden asks as he sits on the other end of the couch.

“It is none of your business. I asked you to talk so we could start the divorce process.” Aiden’s eyes go wide.

“What? I’m not signing anything. We can still work this out.”

“I don’t want to work it out with you. I’m tired and done. There is nothing left in me to work this out.”

“Then let me do all the work.”

I laugh. “Let you do all the work? You don’t even know what the work comprises. There is nothing more left for us. We tried our best. We need to move forward with our lives.”

I get a ding on my phone. Aiden looks at my phone and me. I reach over and grab it. It’s a message from Jay.

Jay: I hope you slept well. Can’t say I did. My bed was half empty. I was thinking about you and wanted to say good morning.

I smile at my phone, wondering what Jay is doing right now. He’s probably sitting at his desk with his laptop open, working away. He was always up before me. I would come down from the room and walk straight to his office to see if he was in there. Nine times out of ten, he was. He would work while I enjoyed my morning coffee outside in the sun. It became a morning routine. I thought about how nice this would be to do every morning. Except I would have to work too. Aiden interrupts my thoughts. “Who is that?”