Page 63 of One Unexpected Kiss

Shit.I ducked my head. It wasn’t my style to make fun of my patrons.Asshole status, level up.I guessed their drinks would be on the house that evening.

I quickly finished preparing the flights and poured a glass of soda. I placed two of the flights in front of Claire and Stephanie. Before I could take the other one and the soda over to the table the Wellness Retreat group was sitting at, the door opened, and in strolled a man who had more hair on his body than his head. That wasn’t knowledge I would normally be privy to, but he was buck naked.Fuck my life.

He put his hands on his bony hips. “What’s taking so long?”

“Hold your horses, Hank!” one of the others called. I didn’t know which one because I was looking at the ceiling so as not to assault my eyes with the geriatric twig and berries on display. “We told you we were getting drinks.”

“But you know I’m waiting in the car.”

“And you know I told you to put some damn clothes on so you could come in with us.”

“I’m just following instructions. I’m certain my past self was a nudist.”

Past and apparently present.We weren’t one of those establishments with a “No shirt, no shoes, no service” sign on the door, but until that moment, we hadn’t needed one. I wasn’t exactly sure how to handle this situation.

Grandpa Charlie appeared as gobsmacked as I was.

“Hank, get your scrawny ass back to the car,” the woman at the Wellness Retreat table called. “If you want to come in, you’ll have to put on the extra toga.”

I swallowed. “Yeah, what she said.”

We didn’t have a bouncer on staff, because this wasn’t a night club, and even if we did, we wouldn’t keep them for the off-season. I had a nightmarish vision of having to forcefully escort this naked man out the door, and I suddenly felt guilty for laughing at Wes about the skinny-dipping incident.

I finally dared to look at the man again, and his expression was crestfallen. “All bodies are beautiful, and—”

“It’s a health-code violation, Hank!” the toga lady who had invited me to join them yelled. “Go back to the car.”

“Can I at least get a drink first?” His voice had taken on a defeated whining tone, and my shoulders slumped in relief.

“I’ll be happy to bring one to you in the car,” I said quickly. “Nonalcoholic since you’ll be in a vehicle. On the house.”

He sniffed. “Dr. Pepper?”

“Coming right up.”

He turned on his heel and stormed out. I was too slow in averting my gaze and was treated to the full saggy ass white moon.

“Make sure you sit on your towel this time!” the lady called after him. “I don’t want your nads on my seats!”

Jesus Christ. For the first time since starting this job, I wondered if I was in the wrong line of work.

***

“HE WAS ADORABLE,”Stephanie insisted.

“Adorably misguided,” Claire corrected. “He’s lucky Wes wasn’t here, or he might have been arrested.”

Wes tipped his glass to his lips. “Thank God for that. I got my fill of naked Wellness Retreat folks last year.”

Carmen elbowed Claire. “What was Bennett’s reaction again?”

Claire cleared her throat, opened her eyes wide, and held her mouth agape, doing a pretty spot-on impression of a deer in headlights.

“I did not look like that,” I protested. “I’m pretty sure I looked manly and authoritative.”

“Oh, wait, sorry,” Claire said. “It was more like this.” Instead of looking forward, she rolled her eyes up toward the ceiling. “He didn’t know where to look. To tell you the truth, I didn’t, either.”

Carmen laughed so hard tears started streaming down her face, and she would have slid off her stool if Wes hadn’t grabbed her arm.