Page 35 of A Shot of Pretty Poison

I jump over the back of the couch. “Move.”

Cam slides out of the way as I fall to my knees in front of Laiken. She looks at me with a level of fear in her eyes that I’ve never seen. I grab her and pull her against me, pressing her head against my chest so she can hear my heartbeat.

“Focus on my breathing,” I tell her. “You’re going to pass out if you don’t get enough oxygen in, and you don’t want to do that. Ignore everything else and just focus on me.”

The smell of her shampoo wafts into my nose and I hate the effect it still has on me. There’s the biggest urge to kiss the top of her head the way I know she loves, but I stop myself from doing it. That would be too much for me.

Way too much, far too soon.

It takes a minute but she her breathing starts to calm.

“That’s it,” I murmur. “You’ve got it.”

If the universe wanted to torture me, it certainly succeeded. Lying in my bed all night and destroying myself with thoughts of her would have been better than this. The feeling of her in my arms, needing me as much as I’ve always needed her, it’s a lot like walking on a tightrope—with a thousand-foot drop and a hundred starving tigers beneath me.

When she finally gets through the worst panic attack I’ve ever seen her experience, I feel her start to back away from me, and I have to force myself to let her go. She runs her fingers through her hair, reminding me of the way I pulled it earlier.

Fucking stop it.

Cam and Mali both look relieved as we all go over to sit on the couch. Laiken leans against Mali like she’s the only thing in the world holding her in one piece, and I hate the fact that it’s no longer me she relies on. But then again, I haven’t given her any reason to believe she still can.

“Okay, without breaking out into another one of whatever the fuck that was, tell me what happened,” Cam says.

Well, at least when he knocks my ass out, I’ll get a few moments of peace. Then again, thoughts of Laiken have a tendency of haunting my dreams, too. All I can do is hope he doesn’t go for the ribs. There’s only so much more they can take right now.

Laiken’s eyes meet mine before she forces them away, and I know I’m fucked. “I don’t even know where to start.”

“The beginning would be nice.”

Mali narrows her eyes at him for the smartass comment.

“Fuck, okay,” Laiken sighs. “There’s someone threatening me. They have been since before I left.”

Cam’s jaw drops. “What the fuck?” He turns to me. “Did you know about this?”

I can’t tell if I’m relieved this isn’t about me, or worried what else could have sent her into that kind of a tailspin. “I didn’t until tonight. She kept that little secret to herself, as if we didn’t have a right to know.”

“Don’t be an asshole,” Mali sneers. “I love you. You’re like my brother. But I’m not going to sit here and listen to you be mean to her.”

Fucking of course not. Does she not realize that Laiken walked out on her, too? That not even being best friends for the majority of their lives mattered enough to her? It’s like the moment Laiken came back, Mali went blind to it all and they were right back to how they’ve always been.

But that won’t be me.

I won’t give her the power to break me like that again.

Instead of apologizing, I flip Mali the bird.

“You want that shoved up your ass? Because that can be arranged,” she threatens.

“All right,” Cam intervenes. “We don’t need you two going at each other right now. Laiken, what do you mean someone has been threatening you?”

Her breathing goes uneven, the aftermath of hyperventilating. “They know about what happened with Monty. It’s why I left. They threatened to make sure Hayes was charged with murder if I didn’t.” She starts to cry again. “I couldn’t let that happen. There are too many people that would be devastated by that.”

My eyes roll as I force myself to look away. It’s not that I don’t somewhat appreciate what she did for me. There’s a part of me that does, but it’s overpowered by a much larger part that just wants to scream in her face that she should’ve told me.

“Lai, your breathing,” Cam reminds her, and she starts the long, slow breaths again to calm down. “That makes a lot more sense to me than you just randomly taking off, but why wouldn’t you come to us? We could’ve helped you.”

“Because I wasn’t allowed,” she explains. “There was an envelope left in my car with a picture in it from that night. Clear proof that Monty was dead and Hayes was involved. And on the back of it were three rules I had to follow if I wanted to keep him out of prison.”

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