“No, not that. Something else.” He turned back to me. “Pretend you didn’t hear any of that. Speaking of art…I hear that the two of you had quite the artistic evening. Nigel framed a print of your pose, Brooklyn. I got to see it before he took it to his fourth home. Or is it his fifth? I can’t keep track anymore. But the portrait is exquisite.”
“Wait, Nigel did what?” Matt asked.
“Nigel wanted a copy for himself. Something about not getting the one he wanted or something. But I can see why. I might have him make me one too. I really need something in my billiards room.”
“You don’t have a billiards room.”
“Yes I do. It’s the twelfth door on the left. Right past the pool. My rooms are mostly alphabetical for organization, but Nigel was being basic and thought it was called a pool room instead of a billiards room. I’ll have him change it eventually, but he’s been quite busy. He’s very fond of my grandson and Brooklyn and asked for more time off to help them acclimate.”
I laughed. Is that what he called sitting naked on my counter? Acclimating?
But Matt glared at him. “You can’t have a nude portrait of Brooklyn above your pool table.”
“Why? Nigel’s putting his in his bathroom.”
“Is he really?” I asked.
“No, he’s not,” Matt said.
I laughed. “I’m honestly a little flattered.”
“He knew you would be. Speaking of Nigel…I also need to apologize about the security cameras. It was my idea to install them for safety purposes. But I forgot to warn you that he can be a bit of a voyeur. I’ve spoken to him about it before, but let me know if you want me to speak to him again.”
Matt groaned. “Whenever you talk to him on my behalf it just makes it worse.”
“Nonsense, he always listens to me.”
“I don’t think he ever listens to you,” Matt said.
Tanner laughed. “He has to. He doesn’t have a choice. But it’s an iffy thing when it comes to you since he’s not technically your houseboy. It’s a whole gray area and Nigel loves pushing boundaries. I’ve said it time and time again: if he’s bothering you let him blend into the wall.”
“It’s a little hard when he put a door in the middle of my wall to his adjacent home I had no idea he was buying.”
Tanner shrugged. “Well, it does make it easier if he has his own entrance.”
“How? He could use the front door.”
“Having many doors is important, you wouldn’t understand.”
“It’s also hard to ignore him when he’s ass naked on my kitchen counter.”
Tanner laughed. “Why on earth was he naked on your counter? Did you tell him to do that?”
“Of course not.”
I couldn’t help it, I started laughing so hard. “He’s a little competitive with Jacob. Something about being the most adorable boy in the room?”
“Ah, yes. I’ve heard him say that. He’s on the search for his own grandson and that should fix it I think.”
Matt sighed. “You can’t kidnap a kid. We’ve been over this. And Jacob isn’t your grandson. If anything he should probably call you Uncle Tanner.”
“Nonsense. I’m his grandfather. Watch.” He turned to Jacob. “Jacob, who am I?”
“My abuelo,” Jacob said.
“See?”
I nodded.