I walk her over to Taylor and Jesse and a very pissed off Jackie.
“Are you guys ready to go, or can you find a ride home?” I ask, Madison still protesting from over my shoulder.
“Ya know what man, this party blows. Let’s get out of here,” Jesse says.
“Oh shit. Henry, we cannot take Madison back to the dorms like that. Our RA is such a bitch,” Taylor adds, looking a little tipsy herself.
“It’s fine,” I tell her. “We can all go back to my house. You guys can crash in the basement.”
Jesse stands and wraps his arm around Taylor.
“Sweet babe, we can watch the game highlights on his massive tv then fuck on the couch.”
“The fuck you will,” I say, already walking away.
“Fine. No watching the highlight reel, but we can still fuck, right?” Jesse pleads, as if he’s a five-year-old asking to stay up on a school night.
I don’t answer him and keep walking as they follow behind me, cackling. We go around the side of the house instead of through it and out to my truck. Madison stopped protesting and is laying limp across my back, her hands gripping me to keep herself steady. Her hands are holding on tight to my sides and I’m trying so hard to keep my thoughts in check. Trying not to think about the fact that I would barely have to move my hand holding her dress down to slip my fingers under her panties.
I pull open the driver's side door and gently set her down on the bench seat. Her head dips toward me as I buckle the seatbelt around her. Her hair is inches from my nose and I inhale. She smells as intoxicating as she did in the library; like warm vanilla and a scent that’s uniquely Mads.
“I don’t even like Caleb, ya know. He’s kinda a douche,” she whispers, placing her palm against my chest.
“I know Mads. I know.” I say, sliding in next to her.
Taylor and Jesse climb in, Taylor sitting on Jesse’s lap, so we all fit. I normally wouldn’t over fill my truck like this, but I haven’t been drinking and I make Taylor and Jesse still put the seatbelt on around both of them. The drive home is quick since there’s no one on the roads. Madison is leaning into my side, gently snoring. I wrap my arm around her to keep her from falling over. I gently run my thumb back and forth on her bare arm and she cuddles closer to me and lets out a small whimper. God, I wish we were the only ones in this truck, and I wish she wasn’t drunk.
I wonder if something more than her being jealous of Jackie is going on because the Mads I know wouldn’t get drunk like this. She was never a partier, and she hated what drinking would do to her mom. Then again, I’m starting to wonder how well I actually knew her. No, I know her. I know her better than anyone, just like she knows me better than anyone. Well, she knows Ender. She knows the person I want to be.
The living room lights are still on when I pull into the driveway. Mom must still be awake. I gently cradle Madison in my arms and carry her up to the house. She cuddles into my chest, still asleep.
“Henderson, is that you?” Mom calls from the other room.
“Yeah Mom, it’s me. Jesse and Taylor are here too,” I respond as I head toward the stairs.
“Hey guys, go say hi to my mom. I’m gonna go put her down and I’ll meet you in the basement,” I tell Taylor and Jesse before making my way up to my room.
I take Madison up the stairs and gently kick open my bedroom door, grateful I was bored this morning and cleaned up. My room never gets embarrassingly messy, but if she woke up and found a pile of my dirty underwear, I wouldn’t want that being her first impression of how I live. I lay Madison on top of the bed as gently as I can, hoping she stays asleep. She stirs a little, but turns onto her side, tucking her hands up under her face and gently sighs. Her hair is splayed out over my pillow and I want nothing more than to climb into the bed with her, but I know I can’t. Not when she’s been drinking like this. After I pull off her shoes and cover her with a blanket, I head down stairs to explain to Mom why there’s a girl she doesn’t know sleeping in my bed tonight.
Mom’s always been cool about girls. And because she’s not an idiot, and she’s a nurse, she buys me condoms and makes me get tested regularly. Even if I’m not having sex. We don’t actually talk about my sex life, or lack of one, but she’s made it clear that she’s not naive enough to think I’m not having sex. When my dad left, she made a point to tell me once–anything I’d ever learned or heard from my dad about sex or how to treat a partner was bullshit and to forget it all. She made this statement out of the blue one day while we were driving in the car somewhere. There was no lead into it or follow up statements from her. She just blurted it out. I didn’t ask questions or ask her to elaborate. I let her seething comment hang in the air.
That’s happened a few times–her randomly getting reminded of something my dad did or said that we all let slide. She acknowledges it, but we rarely talk about it. We let whatever short burst of anger or resentment she has be released into the air and go about our day. I think it’s healing for her to talk about it so freely whenever she wants, without any judgment. This is part of why I know I can tell her the bare minimum of what she needs to know about Madison, and she’ll trust me to tell her the rest when I’m ready. We’ve gotten better at being honest but also letting each other take time with our honesty.
Chapter nineteen
Madison
Myheadfeelslikethere are elephants wrestling inside of it and my mouth feels like I’ve swallowed cotton. I’m awake but fighting the urge to open my eyes because I already know it will be too bright. Cracking open one eye, just a little, I find I’m definitely not in my dorm room. With both eyes open now, my head is screaming and pushing my hand to my forehead isn’t any relief. Okay, let’s try to get our bearings.
I’m in a queen sized bed with gray sheets and a patchwork quilt on top of me. I can see a desk across from me with a few books and a laptop. There’s a shelf above the desk with trophies. They look like they’re maybe football trophies. Hats hang on the wall next to the shelf. Now, I’m almost certain I’m in a guy’s room. Whose, I’m not completely sure yet. Am I still at Caleb’s house? Is this his room? I look behind me on the bed. I’m alone, good sign. I’m still wearing my dress, and my bra and underwear are still on. More good signs.
There’s a glass of water on the nightstand and a bottle of ibuprofen. I sit up slowly but drink the water greedily and down three of the pills. A note is sitting next to the glass.
Come downstairs whenever you’re ready. Taylor and Jesse are here too.
Henry
Well, that solves the puzzle.