Page 46 of I Hear You

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry,” more laughter, “but, that is the most bad reality television, 2000s soap opera, bullshit I have ever heard. You are totally fucked.”

“Seriously Emmett. You suck,” I groan, dramatically falling back and laying across the couch. I kick him with my foot.

“Okay, I’ll be serious. Look, you’ve clearly got two choices. Tell her who you are and risk her hating you. Or don’t tell her, and she eventually figures it out. But then for sure hates you if you wait too long. But you already know that. And I think you already know what you need to do. Tell her the truth, Henry, just… tell her the truth.”

Emmett has such a look of sincerity on his face, but I can also see a hint of sadness.

I’ve known Emmett almost my whole life and I have never once seen him actually sad. He didn’t even cry when we were kids. If he got hurt while we were playing football, he’d get angry, not sad. Something is definitely going on with him, but he’s like a cat. If I approach too quickly, he’ll make a break for it.

“Yeah, you’re right. I need to figure out the how and when of telling her the truth.”

“While you figure that out, let’s play,” he says, handing me a controller.

We've been playing for close to an hour when I casually ask him where the heck he disappeared to last night at the party.

“I had something to take care of. You know how it is.”

“Something or someone?”

He looks at me and winks, and doesn't answer my question. Well, that went well. I learned nothing. I’m not giving up, though. I will find out why he’s been acting so strange.

Emmett has always been a bit of a lone wolf. He’s never had a real relationship. Just a seemingly endless string of flings and one-night stands for the past few years. We all give him shit about it, but Emmett is a solid friend. He was the one who picked me up from the police station after I was arrested. His parents had paid my bail. He was also at every court hearing, even the stupid ones which only lasted five minutes. He even wrote a three-page letter to the judge in case I needed character witnesses. The guy who spends more time flirting with girls so they’ll do his homework, than actual time doing his own homework–wrote a three-page letter. Thankfully, it never got that far. I’ve never properly thanked him for how much he was there for me through all the bullshit. I hope he knows though how much I appreciate him.

A few hours later, Mom comes down to the basement and asks if we want to go get something to eat at the diner. Emmett fires off a yes before I can even consider it and is up turning off the game console and bounding up the stairs. Taylor had told me Madison has today off, so I know she won’t be there working. I follow them out to the car.

The diner is busy when we get there, but Joy gets us sat in a booth and brings everyone water. We order our food, Emmett orders half the menu. When our food gets here, we all dig in. I have no appetite so I only ordered eggs and toast. Emmett is halfway through his feast before I’m even done with one of my eggs.

“Emmett hun, slow down. I know you haven’t had an appetite, but you’ll make yourself sick.”

Emmett looks at my mom wide eyed, but sets down his fork and drinks some water. Why does my mom know he hasn’t had an appetite? Before I can ask, I notice someone walking through the door to the diner. It’s Madison.

Chapter twenty-one

Madison

Ispentthewholecar ride from Henry’s house to campus trying to convince myself I’m being delusional. That there is absolutely no way Henry and Ender are the same person. It’s impossible. It would be way too much of a coincidence and way too bizarre. When I get into my dorm room, I close the door behind me and lean up against it, rolling my head back until it lightly taps the door. Looking up to the ceiling, trying to keep the tears that are beginning to well in my eyes from falling. This can not be happening.

Think, be rational. If I just think all the coincidences through, I’m sure there are rational explanations for all of them. The more I think about them, the more confused I am. Even from the first day we met, when he pulled his hand away so quickly, it was right after I said my name. When he shared the book of poetry with me in the library, he knew I would love it. The donut. He called me Mads. He called me Mads! That’s why he pulled away when we kissed. He knows it’s me. How the fuck does he know it’s me and I’m just now figuring out he’s Ender?

I pace back and forth in my small dorm room, trying not to rip out my hair. My hangover is all but gone and is being replaced by anxiety and anger. I’m seething. He definitely knows it’s me and he didn’t tell me! Was he planning on ever telling me? I drop to the floor, sitting in the middle of the room. I’m full on crying now, big fat tears dropping onto my legs. After a few minutes of wallowing, I decide I have to make sure I’m right. I pull my laptop off my desk into my lap and bring up google.

I type in “Henderson Easton Maryland” a few articles come up that talk about him and his high school football days. Ender and Henry both play football. The signs I should have seen just keep stacking up. I click a link at random and there he is. It’s an article that includes what looks like his senior high school photo. Henderson Adler, quarterback, the caption reads. Well, at least now I have a last name too. I skim through a few more articles. Wow, he is apparently a good quarterback, like seriously good. There are articles talking about him being scouted by multiple colleges and I even find one that says he was practically committed to Virginia Tech. If that’s true, then what the hell is he still doing in Easton?

I go back to google and search his full name. An article from almost a year ago catches my eye and I gasp. “Local College Football Hopeful Arraigned on Attempted Murder Charges”. This can’t be right. My hand trembling, I click to open the article. And there, staring me in the face, is Henry. It’s a mugshot. I scan the article faster than my brain can process the words. My already cracked and beat up heart bursting wide open. I let myself feel all the pain he must have felt.

Local Easton high school student, Henderson Adler, was arraigned today on attempted murder charges. Adler, who was arrested on August 8th for allegedly beating his father, Christian Adler, so severely with a trophy Adler, C. was in intensive care for four weeks following surgery for a ruptured spleen, pleaded not guilty.

Adler, H. who will not be charged as an adult as he is still only 17, is currently awaiting his trial from home under house arrest. The teenager, who will be a senior in high school next year, is a local football star quarterback and is said to have recently made commitments to play for Virginia Tech College.

Adler, H.’s attorney provided this comment on the steps outside the courthouse today. “My client has pleaded not guilty today because he acted in self-defense of another. You will see in trial that what this young man did was heroic.”

Reliable sources tell us, allegedly, on the night of August 8th, Adler, H. arrived home to find his father, Adler, C. abusing the defendant's mother. The trial is set to begin on September 28th.

I slam my laptop shut and cover my mouth with my hands, trying to understand what I just read. Is this for real? I remember Taylor telling me last night about something happening with him. She said it wasn’t her story to tell. Is this what she was talking about? I open the computer again and start searching for more articles. I’m assuming he wasn’t found guilty because he’s not sitting in prison right now, but I can’t help myself from wanting to know more of the details. There are a few more articles that explain he ended up taking a plea deal before the trial even finished. Because he was a minor, the Judge agreed to seal part of the record.

When I scan back through the original article again, the date catches my eye–August 8th. He was arrested on August 8th. The same day he sent me the email telling me he loved me. The same day he pleaded for me and I pushed his feelings aside because I was terrified.

When I read his email, I was overwhelmed. Overwhelmed with emotion and the choice, the choice of accepting his love and meeting him in real life or the choice of lying to him, telling him I didn’t feel the same way and everything about our relationship changing. In a panic and in total cowardice, I chose neither option. I chose to ignore it, forever. Or so I thought.

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