Page 69 of Master of Lies

I grabbed BBBag and scattered the contents out onto the counter, pawing through them, discarding this one, that one. I stopped on the pack of tampons, tucked in a pink flowered satin “modesty bag.” I tore open the fluffy absorbent cotton shell of one of the tampons, prying out the tiny spray bottle I had stitched inside.

This design was my friend Rose’s brainchild, my fellow badass bitch. Poor Rose was a much better human being than me, however, and she would be horrified to learn that I had actually brought this theoretical thing into being. During our tequila-fueled brainstorming sessions, Rose had told me many fascinating things about mind-bending designer drugs she was researching. Tamloxid 343 had shown promise as a treatment for chronic depression that did not respond to serotonin boosting anti-depressants, but the researchers had realized that at very high doses, involuntary truth-telling was an unexpected side effect. A possible interrogation enhancer. Big, fat can of ethical worms, torn wide open.

I’d paid a ton of money to have some Tamloxid 343 concocted for me. Super illegal. Just the thing for a badass bitch to have up her sleeve if lives were at stake.

That bastard was going to tell me the whole truth tonight. Even truths he might be hiding from himself. Chances were, I wasn’t going to like it. My romantic fantasies were much more fun than the most likely truth; that he didn’t give a shit about me.

And the worst possibility of all—that he’d betrayed Shane.

Seduction was the only half-assed plan my stressed out brain would suggest for getting this done. Mostly because it didn’t require a great deal of thought, nor was it ever met with much resistance. But I did not feel seductive. I felt gutted.

Too fucking bad.

The tiny cylinder had a spray nozzle to push. According to my careful research, one quick pump should deliver more than enough for a full dose.

I took a swift look at myself in the mirror, and placed the slender bottle between my index and middle finger, practicing the swift, decisive flip-and-twist necessary to get the nozzle under my finger.Zap.Right in his face.

Then I slid it back and pushed open the bathroom door.

Jed stood there, standing at the window and staring out into the darkness. He turned to look at me, his eyes full of misery. It almost softened my resolve. Almost.

“I’m so sorry, Freya,” he said. “I’ll say it until my throat cracks.”

“Your throat, not mine,” I said.

“You won’t forgive me?”

“Piss off,” I said. “I’ve had a really horrible… how long was it? Four hours?”

“Three hours and twenty-three minutes,” he said. “Never again. I swear.”

I harrumphed. “What a lovely sentiment. Gee, thanks.”

“Hey. Babe. Don’t be that way.”

“Actions have consequences, Jed.”

“I was just trying to protect you,” he said.

“By taking away all my agency and making me helpless? Don’t do me any more favors, Jed. I don’t think I’d survive another one.” I sat down heavily down on the bed.

“It was the only solution I could think of to protect you from danger,” he said.

“Bullshit,” I said. “You were protecting yourself. Not me.”

“Maybe you’re right. But if you give me another chance, I’ll do better.”

I couldn’t let myself look him in the eyes, or I wouldn’t be able to go through with this. I’d have another sobbing, crying meltdown. All my nightmare memories would fly out into his face like a flock of vampire bats. And it would serve him right.

Jed sat next to me on the bed, and rested his arm on my shoulders.

There were two separate, distinct Freyas in that moment. One of them wanted to cuddle into his warmth. Wallow in his tenderness. Lean on his immense strength. A bulwark against all the bad, scary, hateful things running around out there. And there were a fuck-ton of them.

And there was the other Freya. Raging, vengeful, hurt. The pressure building up, up, up inside her, like steam, just about to reach the breaking point.

I flipped up the spray bottle, twisted—

But Jed’s reflexes were lightning fast. His hands clamped down on mine, trapping the nozzle in the down position so it kept on hissing. Spraying everywhere.

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