Page 48 of Secretly Loving my Cowboy Best Friend

Of course she’d read his thoughts.

“What was wrong with him then?” Austin asked, ready to be on the lookout for these qualities in the future. If a guy had any of them, Austin wouldn’t implement the two-week plan. He wouldn’t go through the agony of missing Sofi unless he knew for sure the next guy was the guy. Or at least had potential to be the guy.

Sofi swallowed, her golden skin paling oddly.

Was she okay? Bashhadhurt her. Austin was going to kill him. His fists began to clench.

Sofi dropped her gaze and whispered something Austin couldn’t quite pick up over the roaring in his ears.

“Sorry, what was that?” he asked, shifting forward so that he was right next to Sofi, her knees pressed against his thigh.

“He wasn’t you,” Sofi repeated, slowly lifting her eyes to meet his.

Austin felt his body go stiff as her words penetrated his mind. He shook off the feeling of fear, pushed back the shock. He could have misheard. And if he hadn’t . . . he had to be here for Sofi. Be in his right mind to explain things in a way that she would understand and forgive him for. So they could go back to what they had been.

“Thankfully no one else is.” Austin tried for a joke that fell flat when neither of them laughed.

Okay, no more joking. He should have known from the start, but he’d hoped to lighten the mood. But now he focused on what he had to say. On what he had to prove to Sofi.

“What do you mean by that, Sof?” Austin asked, needing her to be completely clear before he could let her down as easily as a man had ever let down a woman. He hated that he was letting Sofi down. All he ever wanted to do was lift her up, but this was a necessary evil. One that he hoped she would appreciate one day soon.

Sofi’s body lifted and suddenly her lips were on his. His blood roared with pleasure, responding before Austin’s mind could realize what was happening. And with that roar, his mind shut off, his body took over, and boy was it happy to do so.

Austin’s hands cradled the back of Sofi’s head before he deepened the kiss and lost all control. His hands twined through her hair as her arms slipped around his shoulders, tugging him closer. He needed more of her.

He pulled her onto his lap, desperately seeking a better angle, every part of his body craving her touch. It wasn’t enough that her hands were caressing his back, her arms clinging to his shoulders. It wasn’t enough that her legs were wrapped around him. He needed more.

But the only way to get more . . .

It was that thought that connected Austin’s body with his mind. His mind that was yelling at him to slam on those brakes.

Austin, his entire body rebelling as he did so, pulled his head back, breaking the all-encompassing connection he’d shared with . . . his best friend. He’d kissed Sofi.

And he couldn’t deny it was like nothing he’d ever experienced. Something he wanted to live over and over again. But if he had any hope of keeping this incredible woman in his life, he could never repeat that experience.

He released Sofi, leaning back as he ran his hands through his hair and tried to catch his breath.

He recognized the look of disappointment on her face.

This was why best friends shouldn’t kiss.

“I shouldn’t have—” he began but stopped when he saw her vehemently shake her head.

“Don’t regret me,” she stated in a tone so firm it caught him off guard.

She climbed off of his lap and Austin had to sit on his hands to keep from reaching out to her once more.

“I could never,” he managed through the fog that their kiss had caused. It would be a fog of bliss if it wasn’t so wrong. Now shame and guilt tinged what should have been beautiful.

“I know you enjoyed that,” Sofi said.

Austin had to nod. He wouldn’t lie to her. Especially now.

To be completely honest, he had more than enjoyed it, but he wasn’t going to add that. He figured there was a line between lying and omitting unnecessary information.

“I know you love me.”

Austin nodded again. He doubted she could comprehend his love for her.

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