Page 34 of Double Devotion

“Yeah! I agree. I never was serious.” He again surprises me with his directness and honesty. He’s so self-aware. “It’s hard for me to bond with people, especially women. I never had anyone serious, relationships and things like that. I mean, there are a whole bunch of women I spend time with. I also have some friendships that are a little more important but, as a whole, I avoid unnecessary closeness. At least I did until today. I always preferred to block my emotions, I was afraid to get too attached and then risk losing the person. I wanted to avoid ever feeling that emptiness again, and that pain you feel after your loved ones have gone.” He speaks to me so frankly, playing on my heartstrings. “But lately I don’t find superficial dating that interesting. I think I’ve reached the end of my quota of women. Now I’m looking for depth. Companionship. Something else. I’m tired of dulling my loneliness with more meaningless sex. I never had an urge to conquer women. It’s just that the older I got, the more powerful I felt. Later it became amusement, an addiction to the adrenaline and the thrill. I wasn’t able to emotionally commit to anyone. Maybe it’s because of my unresolved issues with my mother. Regardless, these days it’s become a tool to numb some pain, filling voids and blowing off steam. But I hate waking up next to a stranger in the morning. That’s why I never stay. I try not to bring them home either, because I keep them as far from my environment as possible. I never make promises and I try never to belittle them. They understand it’s a momentary urge. When the act’s done, good as it might be, our relationship is over. Until today, I never wanted anyone to sabotage the utopian world I’d created for myself. But here I am, my soul so sick and tired that I want to scream, to weep and be held. But I’m not comfortable doing that with the people around me.”

“Have you considered going to therapy?” I softly caress the back of his hand.

“Honey, more therapy?” he laughs. “I’ve been in therapy from the day I was born. I suffer from some sort of communication issues. It’s hard for me to read other people’s feelings correctly and fit into their worlds. Usually people come into my life, drawn by the mystery, and surround me until they grow weary, understanding that there’ll be no further progress from here, and then they go on their way. There are some very special people in my life, like Michael, Tony, my brother Dean, and the guys from my unit. I’m myself and vulnerable and feel loved by them, but with others it’s a totally different story. Except for you.” He looks right into my eyes. “You’re something else. The energies you brought with you from Jerusalem are additive.”

“Additive?” I try to understand.

“Added value,” he clarifies. “You’ve got something that no one else has, you know what it is?”

“No,” I respond, dead serious.

“Authenticity!”

“Avi, that’s not the best pick-up line I’ve ever heard,” I smile.

“Forget pick-up lines and all that shit.” He takes me by the hand. “I’ve completely run out of patience for those things!” He pulls my hand to him impatiently. “Let’s go home already, I’m want to continue this and get to know you better.”

The drive back was quiet, we barely spoke. Our thoughts wandered, each to their own.

“We’re here,” the cab driver informs us as he stops by the mansion’s broad front gate.

“Thanks so much.” He holds out a large bill for the driver. “Keep the change,” he clarifies, and we both head out towards the house. He opens the front gate using his digital fingerprint, and we stride towards the front door, gazing at each other.

“Well,” he clarifies, “it’s your turn now. Do me a favor, go get us something to drink.”

“Hot or cold?” I ask.

“Spicy.” He continues walking towards his room.

I immerse myself in preparing the drinks, wondering what will happen next. I return to him and hold out a half-filled glass of whiskey with ice chips, just like he’d prepared for me the night before. He immediately notices that I’m trying to please him.

“Come here.” He pulls me onto his knees, and my legs – exposed up to the knee – rub against his stunning denim jeans.

“Cheers.” We clink our glasses and drink, looking into each other’s eyes. We get closer. Wrapped in an eruption of passion, we taste the remnants of the whiskey on each other’s lips. And in an instant, like in a romantic movie, he picks me up and hurls me onto his bed, knocking aside my shoes, unbuttoning my pants and ripping any remnant of the light blue collared shirt off me, all with skill and insane speed. My head’s spinning.

Now I’m in white cotton panties and a tight strapless undershirt, exposed before him. He scrutinizes my body, thanking God Almighty for the gift he’s been given, looking at me with a naughty half-smile.

“What’s with this perfection?” He expects no answer.

Avi’s bedcover is a kind of delicate grey fur. I’m sprawled on it as he kisses my body starting from the soles of my feet, slowly making his way to my inner thigh. There he pauses with small bites, accompanied by kisses and delicate sucking on the skin. He gently and attentively takes off my panties, sitting me up in front of him, removing my small undershirt while ceaselessly kissing and caressing my back, which is covered in a cruel chill. I hear the sounds of my passion fill the room, and he’s completely immersed in me as though deaf, desecrating my body, doing what he wills. He slides his thumb over my nipple, and uses his tongue to envelope, pull and bite at it with small, piercing bites while it reacts to him, as though stirring back to life. Even I wasn’t aware of the way it could get so shamelessly erect. My body is practically collapsing beneath him. I let him do whatever he wants to me and enjoy every second of it. He moves his head towards my ear, creating friction and an insane chill that spreads from the tips of my scalp down to my pinky toes.

“I’ve never felt this way,” he blurts out, continuing to explore me and letting loose with ceaseless compliments about my body, its scent and the fact that I’m so smooth and tanned. I’m completely ready for him, waiting for him to seal my fate and take me apart. When I’m in his arms I don’t care about anything. I let loose the tremendous sounds of my orgasm into the space of the room while he sucks my clit and slides his tongue over it again and again, slowly and stubbornly.

“Now it’s your turn!” I clarify, and immediately bend down before him, starting to gently kiss his chest, scattering gentle bites towards his ribs. I slide my mouth down towards the fine hairs around his navel, and the thin stripe descending towards his balls. I gently caress them, one by one, placing my tongue between them, massaging them with my lips, a kiss, friction, and I slowly rise towards the vein decorating his amazingly beautiful manhood. I make an effort there too and lick it, pulling and gently setting my teeth on it, slowly advancing until I reach his head. This time I don’t lick delicately but put all of him into my mouth all at once, halfway down my throat, pulling it in and out with shameful gluttony. I keep going, quickly and thoroughly, enjoying every moment, while he lets out groans of true pleasure.

“You’re driving me crazy, what is that?” he grunts. “Are you for real?”

And I carry on proudly, soaking up every compliment I’m receiving, until I feel him lose control into my mouth. Satisfied, I’m filled with pride, smiling a small, surprised smile of victory, still wrapped in passion that’s bursting forth, my finger sensually wiping away the remnants of his fluid passions.

“Now it’s your turn again!” He flips me over at once and starts placing small, delicate kisses from my tailbone to the line of my butt. Slowly, methodically, he goes in. His tongue gradually reaches for my sphincter, while his fingers massage my clit. His tongue is focused on my ass now and he clings to it like a vacuum, allowing me no movement, it’s devoured inside and out, being licked while his mouth stays stable and motionless. I moan with extasy.

Now he grips my cheeks with his hands, kneading them and, for the first time in my life I experience powerful anal pleasure with him only using his tongue. Powerful grunts echo throughout the space of the room.

I climax again – so strongly and just from my anus, I honestly don’t know what self-respect I’ll have left in this house, with this man.

“Wow!” he pants heavily. “I see you’re enjoying this, too.” He smiles in satisfaction. As if the wetness around me is somehow lends any doubt. I choke down a great moan and give in to the pain mixed with pleasure that his palms have left on my exposed skin. “Very much!” I smile, my face radiant with delight.

He lies at my side, resting my head on his chest, caressing my hair.

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