Page 54 of My Billionaire Neighbor's Secret

“Why don’t we meet up for lunch later?” Leigh blurted out as we went out the front door.

“Uh, I’m sorry, but I have a lunch meeting,” I fibbed. Honestly, I just wanted to hole up in my office and eat there in front of my computer. I needed a break from her too. I wanted to miss her, but she’s been so… present.

“Oh, yes, of course,” she said, looking a bit disappointed. “Anyway, perhaps I’ll see you later when we get home from work.”

“Probably,” was all I said before walking toward my car. She began to stride toward hers too. I didn’t even kiss her before getting into my sedan. I wanted to get to work fast and bury all this behind me in the meantime.

After work, I went to the orphanage to play basketball with some kids and just to unwind. It was also my chance to speak with Jillian and do some catching-up again.

“You’re unusually quiet,” Jillian commented as we were having tea at sunset. “What’s wrong?”

“You know me so well,” I said without smiling. “So I won’t say it’s nothing.”

“Is it something at work?” she asked.

I shook my head.

“Then it must be a woman,” she quipped, her lips turning into a grin.

My head snapped toward her. I put down the cup of tea I was drinking. “Are you some kind of mind reader?”

She chuckled. “I’m almost like your mother, Carter. I can tell when something’s bothering you. And if it’s not work, then it must be a woman. And I think I know who it is.”

“Really?” I said in amazement. “How would you know when we haven’t seen each other for a while?”

“Because the last time you were here, I had never seen you that happy and glowing,” she explained. “That company CEO was certainly beautiful and she made you sparkle in a different way.”

I snorted and almost laughed.

“You two would make such a lovely couple,” she told me. “Or are you not one already?”

I shook my head. “You know me…”

“Oh, so that’s the problem,” she said with realization. “Your fear of commitment is taking over, isn’t it? So you’re just going to let this amazing woman go because you’re afraid?”

It seemed like such a bad thing to do when she put it that way. But I had no control over my feelings.

“This is me,” I said matter-of-factly. “I can’t control how I am. Perhaps I’m better off alone forever.”

“Don’t say that,” she said. “You have to talk to her and make her understand so that the two of you can work it out and progress slowly. Work together. I’m sure she’ll be willing.”

“But---”

She raised her hand to stop me. “Don’t you like her a lot?”

“Yes, but---”

She interrupted me again. “No buts. You ought to give it a chance. Give yourself a chance to let go of the fear and just learn to love. Not everyone will leave you and hurt you, Carter. You know that.”

Somewhere at the back of my brain, I was aware of that.

“Please don’t waste this opportunity,” she urged. “It’s not every day that you’ll find a beautiful, smart, and loving woman who’s willing to take care of you and to love you for who you are.”

“But we don’t know that for sure,” I protested. “She doesn’t even know me that well yet. And I don’t know if we’re at that level already. Love is such a big word.”

“Then let the relationship flow and grow,” Jillian said with a smile. “You never get to that level because you always shy away from women who want commitment.”

She definitely got me thinking. And as we said our goodbyes, I thought of Leigh. I pictured her brilliant smile, the way her eyes lit up when she saw me and talked of her passions, the way she made me feel when she kissed me. Deep down, I knew I was starting to care for her--- so much that it scared the hell out of me.

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