Page 40 of Sweet Addiction

I open my mouth to speak only to jump when Knox slams his fist down on the table, rattling all the dishes. My eyes dart to his, and I implore him to not say anything, to keep his cool. His jaw clenches as he takes a breath. “Maybe you should all stop talking about the poor girl as if she is not here and let her make her own choices.” He pins Mom with a look of scorn.

Killian laughs. “Calm down bro; I was only messing.”

“Knox is just being protective. I couldn’t ask for a better father for Madison,” Mom coos, reaching down and lacing their fingers together.

Knox tenses, as he looks down his nose at their connection. I think he is going to pull away, but he doesn’t. I know it’s only for show but still. THEY. ARE. HOLDING. HANDS. I feel sick as my eyes remain on where they are connected.

“I think it’s brilliant and just what my boy needs. Responsibility. To settle down,” Monica adds but I barely hear it through the blood rushing in my ears. “I hope you are planning to have your own children. I can’t wait to be a grandmother.” My head snaps to Knox’s mom and I have reached my limit. I can’t sit here, listening to this.

“Oh, we have talked about it. In fact, we have been getting in plenty of practice for when we start trying.” Mom laughs like she is talking about the weather and not sex. Bile fills my mouth. I need to leave.

“Enough,” Knox growls but I don’t look at him.

“Oh Knox. We are adults. Engaged and living together. I think your parents know we have sex,” she adds. Without even thinking I fly up and out of my chair.

All eyes land on me. I force a smile and swallow the lump in my throat. “I just remembered that I told Talan I would visit him tonight. He wants to give me my gift.”

“Go have fun honey. I’m sure you are bored with the adults.” She waves me off.

My eyes bounce between our guests before landing on Knox. He looks like he wants to strangle me. Fuck him, though. I’ve just had to watch him with my mother and then hear about their apparent sex life. “It’s been lovely. Enjoy the rest of dinner,” I lie, before rushing out of the dining room and up to my bedroom. I’m not really going to Talan’s, but they don’t need to know that. And anyway, I want Knox to think that I am. It might be immature of me, but I want the asshole to hurt.

Changing into some yoga pants and a hoodie, I grab my camera. Racing back down the stairs, I pull open the front door and stride outside to my car.

* * *

I drove up to the park to take pictures. Being that it’s Christmas eve, there is no one else around, which is perfect. It’s peaceful up here, just what I need. As I’m snapping away, my thoughts go to tonight and the soul-crushing hurt I felt hearing and seeing what I did. I know I only have myself to blame for the predicament I’m in. I knew when I started this with Knox that he and Mom have a role to play. For the most part, I accepted that. But things are different now. For Christ’s sake, we have exchanged the L word. It should mean something to him. Tears prick my eyes, making me angrier at the situation. I now wish more than anything that I had taken my father and Vanessa up on their offer to spend the holidays with them in the Maldives. I may have been bored but anything would have been better than being here.

“I knew you were lying about Talan. I also knew you would come here.” The deep familiar rasp has me startling, then squeezing my eyes shut.

“Seriously, why can’t you just leave me alone?” I mutter as he climbs on the bench and drops down beside me.

“I will never leave you alone,” he says simply, with conviction.

I stare off at the setting sun. “How did you know I would be here?”

He shrugs. “Photography is your stress relief. Your happy place. It’s a way for you to forget all the shit and just be you. The real you.”

My breath hitches as I stare at his side profile. I want to be angry with him for what happened earlier and I am. But now that he is next to me, the hurt and pain are easing some. “Why haven’t you told your parents or brother the truth about you and Mom?” I blurt.

He turns to face me. His brow furrows as he blows out a breath. “I don’t know. I will tell them before the holidays are over. I guess I just didn’t want to ruin Christmas. Mom seems so happy that I have ‘settled down,’” he uses air quotes. “I don’t want to disappoint her. I talked to her a couple weeks ago and I didn’t realize the toll my behavior was taking on her health. She hated all the women, the fighting and for the first time, I felt shame in who I was. I’m not that man anymore. Because of you. For now, they think it’s Scarlett. But if you wanted me to go and tell them everything right now. Tell them that it’s you that I love. You that makes me a better man. Then I will. Just say the words Dove and I will. I will tell the whole damn world about us if it makes you happy. I don’t give a fuck about the consequences.” I hear the truth in his voice, see it on his face. If I gave him the green light, he would.

I sigh. “Sometimes, I want to tell Mom everything. Especially when she talks about your apparent sex life and babies.”

He shakes his head. “Nothing has ever happened between us. I promise you that.”

“I know. I trust you,” I say honestly because I do. He has given me no reason not to. “I just hate lying to her. Sometimes I think it would just be better to rip the band-aid off, admit to what we have been doing. But then I imagine her response and it stops me. I know she would be let down, hurt and maybe even disgusted by me.” I take a breath. “Despite all that, I know that I want to be with you. Therefore, at some point we will need to sit her down and tell her about our relationship.”

Knox grins. Wrapping his arm around my waist, he pulls me close, dropping a kiss on my temple. “I want to be with you too. And I promise as soon as you want to tell her, I will be right there by your side.”

“Thank you,” I whisper.

“No need to thank me baby. I would do anything for you.”

I smirk wanting to lighten the mood. “So, what did you think about to the whole me dating your brother?”

Knox growls. “I was seconds away from killing the bastard. What I did to Talan would look like child’s play compared to what I was going to do to Killian.”

I chuckle, snuggling further into his side. “He is harmless and was clearly joking.”

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