Page 85 of His Property

He shakes his head. “No, Emily took it. She wasn't going to keep it or anything, she just takes shit. It’s a weird impulse for her or something.” He waves his hand dismissively. “Long story.”

He picks up his glass and brings it to his lips.

I blink a few times but decide to let it go. I take my own glass and bring it to my nose. My eyes close as I inhale the wine’s scent. I’m by no means an enthusiast, but I know my wine enough to deduce that this is expensive shit. I take a sip, and my taste buds light up.

“Tell me a secret.”

I open my eyes and set my glass on the table. “What?”

Victor lazily leans back in his chair, the glass propped on his knee. “You know all of mine. Tell me one of yours.”

I consider it for a moment. “I don’t have any—”

“Bullshit.”

My mouth is open, and I’m intent on protesting, but after a moment, I exhale. I fall back and rest my hands on the arms of the chair. I file through my past and all my sources of shame and search for one juicy enough to satisfy him. I lied. I have loads of secrets.

“I keyed my last boyfriend’s car.”

Victor raises an eyebrow. “Really?”

The memory of running my key across the red Mercedes, mascara streaking my face, fills my mind, and while normally I would drown in shame, I laugh and nod.

“Why?”

I look up at the sky and think about it. At the time it seemed obvious, but now I’m not so sure.

“I don’t know,” I admit, still searching the sky for answers. “I mean, he cheated on me. I saw him at a bar with another woman.”

“You sound like a Carrie Underwood song.”

I laugh but it sizzles, and my smile falls.

“What is it?” Victor asks.

I tip my head to look at him and see the curiosity on his face. I don’t see a trace of judgment, but I didn’t tell him the pathetic part yet. I’ve never told anyone my real reason.

“I had known he was cheating on me for four months before we broke up.”

Victor’s head tilts, but he doesn’t say anything.

I pick at my fingernails, and it hurts all over again as I play back the memory. I don’t know what hurts worse. My heart or my pride.

“I never confronted him about it. He broke up with me for her and never admitted they were seeing each other. They’re married now. And they have a daughter.”

“Why didn’t you confront him about cheating on you?” Victor asks, his voice holding neither judgment nor pity. He only sounds interested.

I sigh. “Because I was afraid he’d leave me.”

I look at Victor and ooze shame. “I didn’t even love him. It wasn’t about that. I just have a very deep fear of abandonment. My mom, she…” I take a breath, and Victor puts his hand on my thigh.

“You don’t have to tell me,” he says, squeezing my knee. “I was only half serious when I asked you to tell me a secret. It’s okay.”

I pause for a moment, then shake my head. “I want to.”

He sits back, his hand sliding off my knee as he does.

I take a deep breath. “My mom left my dad when I was young, and she moved around a lot. She’s, you know, flaky. I guess it just fucked with me.”

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