Page 35 of Brake's Intent

“Faye, it means he can’t have children because of what they did to him,” Lawson answers.

A gasp slips out, and I cover my mouth with both hands as tears fill my eyes. The thought of what he endured overwhelms me, and to know that he can no longer have children hurts my heart all the more.

“Jax,” I whisper and move to him.

“Don’t pity me, Tink,” he growls, his gaze sharpening. “I don’t need that shit. Not from you or anyone.”

I straighten and narrow my gaze. “No, you don’t need that shit. What you need to do is drop the damn walls and let us in. Me and Lawson.”

“I have,” he states, nostrils flaring. “I’ve let you two in. Even after you left, you were in, and I couldn’t get you out. It’s why I can’t let you go. Either of you. I fought it, but there’s no pushing either of you out. You’re under my skin. Not that I would want that anyway.”

Out of the corner of my eye, I notice Lawson moving in close. “You wanna know what I meant earlier?” he asks, his gaze on Brake. “You say we’re under your skin and let us in. But you haven’t, not fully. If you did, you’d have asked about my family. Why I don’t talk about them.”

I twist to him as it’s my turn to stare at him because he speaks the truth. Neither Brake nor I have ever asked about his family. I just figured he didn’t want to talk about them.

“It’s not like you were offering that information,” Brake rasps. “You’ve been just as closed off as me.”

“True, but I looked into your past. I wanted to understand you,” Lawson says sharply.

“Yeah, and we will get to that in a minute.” Brake narrows his gaze and plants his hands on his waist. “Tell us about your family.”

Lawson turns away from us and lets out a harsh breath. “I had a brother and sister. A mother and father. And on one unfortunate day, I lost them all.”

“Oh god.” The words slip past my lips before I can stop them. “What happened?”

Lawson slowly looks back to us and the mask I now know he’s always kept in place is gone. Standing in front of me is the man who was once a boy and lost his world.

“It was my mother’s birthday. I had a baseball game that afternoon and had ridden with a friend. The game was about to start when my friend’s dad got a call. He was a cop, and he’s the one who told me. My entire family died in a car accident on impact. I was twelve and suddenly all alone. I ended up in foster care because both my parents were only children, and my grandparents were too old to take me in.”

“Law,” Brake utters and steps forward.

Lawson shakes his head before meeting both of our gazes. “This is why I didn’t think about it being your birthday. If it wasn’t for me, my parents wouldn’t have been on the road. They wouldn’t have been coming to watch my game. They would still be here.”

“You can’t blame yourself for the accident. I’m sure they wouldn’t,” I say, tears streaming down my face. This must be what Ela meant. The shadows that lurk within Lawson are horrifying. To lose your entire family has to be heart wrenching. I don’t know if I could handle the pain of losing Rory. Or Finn, for that matter, and he’s my cousin.

“Think about it . . . my mom shouldn’t have died on her birthday. She should have been celebrating, not heading to her kid’s baseball game,” Lawson mutters.

“Did your mom love you?” Brake asks, stepping closer. “Was she proud and supportive?”

“Yeah, she was. Took me to all my games. My sister to dance classes. Everything. Even fuckin’ made cookies and was a part of the PTA.” The anguish in Lawson’s voice is nearly more than I can bear.

“Then she wouldn’t have blamed you. She was heading to where she wanted to be,” Brake declares and steps even closer to Lawson. I move with him wanting to touch both my men. Once close enough, Brake grasps the back of Lawson’s neck. “You can trust me on that. I know what I’m talking about. You know I had a shit mom. Don’t blame yourself for something you can’t control.”

Silence fills the room as we all hold each other close. This day has been the worse, and yet, right now, I can’t believe how lucky I am to have both of these strong, stubborn men in my life. They’re mine. All mine, and I wouldn’t trade a moment of it.

Finally, I glance at Brake and whisper, “You need to lie down.”

“I need a shower first,” he grunts and looks to Lawson. “You gonna help me?” He cocks a brow, and I can’t help but giggle.

“I’ll go grab fresh bandages. Take it easy please.” I start to back away, but neither of them let me.

“You’re gonna help too,” Lawson informs me.

I feel my cheeks blush and my lips part. Well then, I guess I’ll ensure myself that Brake takes it easy and doesn’t hurt himself further.

CHAPTERTWENTY-ONE

LAWSON

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