Page 148 of Love Thy Brother
Pained empathy flooded Nash’s gaze. He leaned over the console and hugged me. “For what it’s worth, I’ve got your back whatever happens, and Cam will too. We live like the club is in our DNA, but it isn’t. We’re a family, Rubes. Before anything else. Never forget that.”
I believed him. But nothing about me and River had ever been that simple. That I wanted it to be didn’t make it so.
Unless it did, and I was fretting myself into a stroke when all I needed was a conversation that didn’t involve anything or anyone that wasn’t him and me.
It wasn’t something we could do over the phone, but as Nash hopped out of the rig, I reached for my blower anyway.
Streaming Spotify non-stop was killing the battery. I dug the charging bank from the glovebox, and damnit, that fucker was already dead.
With a world-weary sigh, I stuck the keys back in the HGV’s ignition, bracing myself for the abrasive rumble of the massive engine. PSA: Unlike hogs, lorries didn’t purr. They shouted at you every moment of the journey until your motherfucking teeth vibrated, and I was done with that shit for one day. Only the primal need to contact River made me want to face it down.
I turned the key, gritting my teeth.
Nothing happened.
Frowning, I tried again, but instead of a battle roar, the engine gave a weak click, and I knew without doubt that our six-hour appointment with dreamland was about to turn into a waking nightmare.
* * *
River
My message thread with Rubi was life. But in the last few hours, it had turned into a clusterfuck that made my chest ache and my skin itch.
Rubi:Rig’s bust
River:how bust?
Rubi:Dead as doornail bust. Nash thinks it’s the battery
River:he’s probably right then
Rubi:That’s what he said
River:you think it’s something else?
Rubi:Nah, I’m just over here fuming cos I want to come home
Fuck, I wanted that too. So much. It was hard to believe I’d spent weeks at a time, sometimes months, without seeing Rubi’s face. Hearing his voice. Touching his warm skin and kissing his soft lips. I was used to jonesing for something, but this shit was out of control.
It was a physical ache. One that had me scratching my arms in the moments I didn’t stop myself.
Or Orla didn’t catch me. “Do you need a Dettol bath?”
“What?”
She stopped in front of me, kicking my mismatched boots just for the hell of it. “You’re acting like you’ve got fleas.”
“Leave me alone.”
Cam walked back into the chapel just in time for that beauty. He blustered a grumpy sigh our dad would’ve been proud of. “Do you have to act like five-year-olds?”
“She’s annoying.”
Orla dropped into Mateo’s chair. “He’s in his feelings and won’t admit it.”
“So?” Cam opened an A4 envelope. “Winding him up isn’t going to make that better.”
I wasn’t expecting him to defend me, but despite the heavy sensation that he had a million things he wanted to say, he’d been everything I needed since he’d accepted my decision to donate the land in Porth Luck. He’d found a non-profit housing trust that genuinely looked after people and recruited Alexei to expedite the legal process. There wasn’t much left to do except sign the paperwork, and we weren’t far off that.
