Page 72 of Pack Rivals, Part One

"Well, I don't!" I shout.

I never shout, and the noise bounces off the walls and the ceiling. It shocks even me. The other two stare at me with concern and none of us speak.

Outside a horn toots and a dog barks. The curtains flutter against the dark window and I swear I can smell the scent of Silver Boston on my skin. Is that why I'm losing my mind?

"It isn't so bad. It simply requires some adjustment, Bea. Once your cycle calms down, once you find a pattern and a routine, once you become used to all these new …" my aunt pauses, watching the way I'm stroking at my darn cheek – the place that alpha kissed me, "you'll be just fine."

"I don't know …" I whisper, my eyes swimming with water. "I don't know."

Courtney trots to my side and wraps her arms around me, resting her head against mine. "Aunt Julia is right, it'll all be fine, sweetie. You're away from shitty McShithead now. You have a new job. You'll find your way."

I sniff, the tears spilling down my cheeks.

"I'll tell you what," my aunt says. "Why don't you come with me to one of the omega social events?"

"Omega social events?" I say, thinking that sounds like one of the circles of hell.

"Yes, talking with other omegas, finding out about their lives, might really help you. You've only met me and Doctor Hannah so far and I'm old and she's …" She shrugs.

"Maybe that would help," I say, leaning into Courtney's comforting embrace.

"Great." Aunt Julia picks up her phone and the screen lights up. "Let me see …There's one over at the Divinity Hotel tomorrow night. I'll take you."

"After my run," I say.

"After your run with Silver," my aunt says sternly.

Courtney squeezes me. "It'll be okay, Bea. I mean, jeez," she sniffs, "you know you still smell delicious even after your run. Lucky bitch."

I manage a watery smile, hoping she's right.

* * *

Despite my firsthorrific driving experience in the city, I decide I've been neglecting Missy long enough, and will grit my teeth and drive my aunt and me to the omega social event. My aunt seems to consider my city driving skills about as poorly as I do. She hisses and squeals her way through the journey, closing her eyes at every opportunity.

Halfway there, she casually drops into the conversation that the social event is a class on flower arranging. I consider swinging Missy right around and heading straight back home.

"That sounds so stereotypically omega," I moan, wondering how I can turn the car around without causing a stack-up. "Like all an omega wants is skills to make their home pretty for their alpha."

I know I'm being hypocritical. Two weeks ago, I would have leaped at such a class, wanting to make our little house the perfect place for me and Karl (hmm, maybe there were omega signs there after all). Now, anything like that has me recoiling in revulsion.

"It's just an excuse for wine and gossip. I doubt there'll be much actual arranging."

I'm not sure if that will be worse. Since I've arrived in the city, I've managed to avoid telling the story of my life. Now I bet I'll be asked.

I grip the steering wheel more tightly and try to come up with an alternative story. One where I don't come out looking like such a pathetic loser.

I peer at my aunt. In all this time we've been spending together I realize I've failed to ask her more about the story of her life.

"What happened between you and my mom?"

"Ahhh," my aunt says, wincing as I cut across lanes and another car honks at me angrily, "siblings. You don't have one so you don't know what it can be like."

"You weren't close then?"

"No, when we were younger, we were very close. I think that was half the problem." My aunt sinks further into her seat. "We grew up together with this idea of how the future would be. We'd run the Naw Creek Diner together. We'd buy houses next door to one another. We'd help raise each other's kids."

Sounds so damn similar to my dream, I wonder if it was ever really my own or had always been my mom's.

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