Page 21 of Royal Creed

But turning down Princess Esme Louisa Victoria Grace Wellingston of Belmont’s proposal is the hardest thing I’ve ever done.

And when I watch Jameson lean in and press his lips to hers, all I see is red, teeth clenched, hands fisted. The idea that he gets to touch her, kiss her, makes me wild with jealousy.

Makes me wish things were different.

As I’ve learned time and again, I can wish all I want. Nothing will change who we are to each other.

“Looks like they’re hitting it off.”

When I hear Anderson’s voice, I take a minute to school my expression and pretend I’m not planning a certain billionaire’s murder, even if it’s simply a fantasy.

“What’s that?” I glance at my best mate.

His features are similar to his sister’s, albeit much more masculine. His hair is the same shade of blond, transitioning into various hues of copper and brown toward the ends. He has the same charming smile. Same tanned complexion. Same tall stature. But where Esme’s sleek and slender, Anderson’s more built. Not as muscular as me, but his dedication to working out hasn’t gone unnoticed, especially from the girls he meets at bars.

It irritates me that he’s allowed to go to bars, clubs, parties, and the royal household doesn’t bat an eye. If Esme were to do the same thing, they’d lose their minds.

The double standards must be exhausting.

Especially for her.

“Jameson Gates and Ezzy.” Anderson nods toward them as they meander through the gardens, hand-in-hand.

At least they’re no longer kissing.

“You’re okay with this?” I arch a brow.

He adjusts the duffle bag slung over his shoulder, starting in the opposite direction from where Esme and Jameson are walking. At least we won’t risk running into them. I doubt I’d be able to watch them kiss so close to me. I better wrap my head around it, though. I have a feeling I’ll have no choice but to witness that quite a bit this summer. Hell, the rest of my life.

“It could have been much worse. Jameson’s a good guy. He has many of the same interests as Esme. Have you seen all the charities he’s involved with? Compared to the two of us, he’s a bloody saint.”

“But does she want to be with him?” I ask, not sure how much he knows. Or how much I’m supposed to know. Then again, we’ve both been around this life long enough to understand how these things work.

“It doesn’t matter what she wants. Only what the royal household wants. She’s almost twenty-five. I’m twenty-six. In their minds, these are prime breeding years. We need to work on the next generation of prisoners- I mean, royals.”

In typical Anderson fashion, he flashes a sarcastic smile, making light of the situation. In reality, he’s as frustrated as Esme about their lack of choice. He just masks his contempt with sarcasm and humor where Esme… I guess Esme takes matters into her own hands. Attempts to exercise free will whenever possible.

“If I weren’t about to get shipped off for one last deployment—”

“Which you volunteered for,” I remind him.

He hushes me, glancing around to make sure no one overheard. If it were up to him, he’d probably stay in the Royal Air Force as long as possible. I’ve never seen anyone love flying as much as he does.

In another life, maybe he would have been a pilot.

But he doesn’t get to follow his dreams. Instead, he’s forced to live a life that’s been planned for him.

“Regardless, if I weren’t currently doing my four years of service, I’d be the one on the proverbial chopping block. Hell, once my deployment is up, I most likely will be. I can only hope the royal household chooses someone halfway decent for me.”

“What about someone you choose? I understand the requirement for you both to marry in order to continue the family line, but why the rush? Why not wait until you fall in love?”

“Love?” Anderson comes to an abrupt stop outside of the military operations building on the palace grounds.

“This may be a difficult concept for you to grasp, but most normal people marry for love.”

“Therein lies your problem, Creed. Esme and I aren’t normal. And don’t you know?” He stands tall, his expression stiff, making it appear as if he has a stick shoved up his ass. “There’s no place for love in a monarchy.”

I don’t have to question who he’s mocking. From the proper tone, it’s apparent it’s his grandmother, Queen Veronica. The Queen Mother.