Page 30 of With You Forever

One breath, one heartbeat at a time ...

Then Seth kisses her, kisses her with a desperation to be closer to her, to show her how much she means to him. Asking her to believe him.

“Don’t push me away,” he whispers against her lips. “Please, princess.”

Lacey whimpers and runs her hands through his hair, pulling him closer. “I won’t,” she says, and she means it.

Tries to.

It’s been a damn long day.

Seth sits in a Six String boardroom waiting to have a conference call with an overseas tour venue that Bobby arranged. So far there’ve been no signs of Luke, Jace or Bobby, which is just fine with him because his mind is anywhere but the music.

It’s on Lacey.

In front of him, spread across the glossy dark table, are proposals from architects. Pamphlets from the cancer center. The cartoon illustrations, the robotic instructions piss him off. Like it’s that easy.

Like the love of his life isn’t in pain.

Like he doesn’t hear her crying in the bathroom everything morning, lying awake beside him every night.

With a tired groan, Seth smears his face in his hands.

After the blowup at Sal and Luke’s, both of them have been doing their damnedest to keep on keepin’ on. At night, he and Lacey come together, Lacey whispering she loves him, needs him, but despite her promise, despite the love they make, he can feel her pulling away.Pushinghim away. There’s no wedding talk. She’s working every hour she can, running on coffee and the highest heels he’s ever seen. A coping mechanism he saw firsthand in LA. Working her ass off to stay sane.

And all he can do is watch her go.

He gets it. He’s doing the same thing.

Burning both ends to keep the faith. Reading these pamphlets, building a house, it’s what he can do to take charge. To not feel so goddamn helpless. So full of rage.

It’s either this or go to that same dark place he went after he got Luke hurt.

He can’t go there again. There ain’t no damn way. Not with Lacey to take care of.

His job is to stay steady for her when everything inside of him feels shook up and stomped on. Do everything he can to push their life forward. To get her healthy. To show her their future won’t stop or end, that he’s right there beside her.

Because he knows what she’s thinking. How do you go on with a normal life when it feels like the noose could drop at any time?

His eyes fall to the pamphlet about post-surgery care. Seth has read and researched and knows this shit inside and out. Hell, if Lacey has to go through it, he’s gonna know everything too. He’ll be damned if she goes through this alone.

It’s bad enough she’s at the doctor right now getting poked and prodded for her upcoming surgery. The testing’s complicated, drawing blood, scanning for autoimmune diseases to get a picture of her overall health. He should be with her, but Lacey claimed Sal’s better at the medical stuff. Another way she’s pushing him away. She doesn’t want him to worry.

She doesn’t want him around.

The thought rips him apart from the inside out.

The loud crack of the door has Seth’s head snapping up. Luke and Jace. They stop. Stare at the pamphlets and plans spread out across the table next to Seth’s fiddle case.

Luke’s eyes widen at Seth’s appearance. “You look like shit.”

“I remember this with Sal,” Seth says with a grin. Trying to keep that same swagger everyone expects. “Except it’s you chasin’ me this time.”

Luke frowns.

Jace settles beside him. “How’s Lacey doin’?”

Seth shrugs. “She’s Lacey. Runnin’ scared. She won’t talk to me. She won’t eat and she sure as hell ain’t sleepin’.”

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