Page 127 of Mr. Flirt

“Your friends explained to me that—”

My hand flew up. “Wait. What?”

“Your friends. Mike and Brendan came to my office.”

“Why? When?”

She bit her lip, which looked deliciously sexy, but didn’t answer my questions.

“They are extremely convincing, and as I was sitting with Cliff tonight, I realized a lot of things. Can I have a seat? The room is kind of swerving. Or maybe it’s me. Maybe I’m swerving.”

I laughed nervously and sat her on the couch while my mind ran wild with thoughts about Mike and Brendan.

“Your friends told me that you just needed to see me happy with someone else.” She drank more water. “And I tried to fake being happy tonight. I really did. I wanted you to see it and be able to move on and forgive your friends. There’s nothing more that I want than for you to be happy.”

“You knew I was there?” My heart hammered in my chest. There was so much I wanted to say to her, but I could see she wasn’t completely focused.

“I snuck a look at you every chance I could get,” she confessed.

“I never saw you look in my direction.”

“That’s because you were busy scoping out the table of women next to us,” she teased.

Her words burned. “No. I wasn’t. I didn’t even see any table but yours, and the more I saw you enjoying yourself with Cliff, the more I realized that I needed to get out of there.”

And this was the problem. She saw me as the womanizer, the player.

Mr. Flirt.

I wasn’t like that any longer. Not since I’d met Lucy, but I didn’t know if I could ever get her to see the real me. Tonight was showing me that, and it killed me.

“I wasn’t enjoying myself with Cliff,” she continued.

“You laughed a lot.”

She smiled and sighed. “Because I was thinking about you and how you’d react to the things we were saying and how little I had in common with the perfect man on paper known as Cliff versus how much I had in common with the silly and fun CEO who’d never want to settle down.”

“You see the Shep you want to see, Lucy. I wasn’t looking at other women. You’re the only woman who exists in my world. But you see what you want to see because of my past actions, and that worries me. I don’t think a future can work when it’s buried in the past.”

She nodded. “You’re right. Absolutely right.”

My heart caved into confusion and worry and everything in between. I loved Lucy more than I could even put into words, but she wasn’t exactly sober enough to let my hopes soar.

“I made some foolish mistakes. I’m sure you read all the texts I sent. I never thought of you as a dare. The moment my friends uttered those words, I forgot them. I didn’t even remember the added part about sleeping with you. There was a brief second where I remembered the whole thing and thought about telling you, but one thing led to another, and we spent our time doing other things. There’s no excuse, and I know what it looks like. I know how I’d feel if I were in your shoes, but from the bottom of my heart, I never meant to hurt you. I fell in love with you, Lucy.”

Her mouth parted, but no words came out. She drew a blue pillow toward her and hugged it. She looked so vulnerable and like the Lucy I knew better than anyone. The same Lucy I’d managed to singlehandedly crush. The ache spread through my body quickly. It was the same pain that had burned through me for weeks. Now, she was sitting in front of me, and I felt completely at her mercy.

“It’s true,” I repeated, pulling her hands into mine. “I apologize for everything.”

“You didn’t do anything wrong, Shep.” She shook her head. Her words slurred slightly. “Client after client comes streaming into my office telling me truly horrendous things about what their partners did to them, and somehow, I internalized all that and placed those things on you. I’m tired. I’m exhausted. I see my future, and it scares me. I don’t know what I want in life anymore. I thought I craved stability, but the thought of picking up everyone’s pieces for the next four decades worries me to death. You’re not the problem. I am. I need to figure out what it is that I truly want in life.”

“I get it, though.” I shook my head. “You saw me as a liability. If I lied about who I was when you first met me, I’d imagine that doesn’t give a lawyer a warm and fuzzy feeling.”

She smirked and nodded. “True, but then I had to remind myself of the context. I had to quit being the super serious attorney and remind myself that someone still has fun in the world.”

“When was this?”

“Tonight, when I was having dinner with Cliff. He was so dry, and I’ve missed the fun of being with you.”

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