I don’t know how to answer this. Adelaide looks so excited, so happy. She’s wriggling and clinging to me, as though afraid that I might tell her that the man she thinks is her father is not really him.
How can I even think about spoiling her happiness? How can I break her heart? I can’t do this to her. I’ve never seen her so happy before. “Can he eat dinner with us?” she asks, looking up at me with the same vivid, navy blue eyes as Demethys. The same eyes that I fell in love with all those years ago.
I stall for a moment, touching her messy hair. “You need a bath,” I say, absentmindedly stroking it. “And I need to brush your hair out.”
“Mama, please let my Dad stay and have dinner, pretty please with a spoonful of sugar on top?”
I glance up to see Demethys lurking in the background, near the door. A part of me is still so very angry that he told mydaughter all this but I know that Addie deserves to know her father, even if I’m not interested in being with him again.
“He can stay,” I tell her and she squeals and hugs me. Demethys looks pleased too but I ignore him and hug my daughter back, trying to control the sudden, rapid beating of my heart.
Demethys leaves and I take Addie upstairs to bathe her before dinner. I’m suddenly feeling self-conscious of my wardrobe for some reason. All my dresses are the simple ones that I had on the island, made for working in the sun. The only nice dress I owned was the one I wore to Layla’s mating ceremony.
I look at it now, trying to decide if I should wear it again but it feels a little too formal for dinner. I stare at my clothing for another moment before shaking my head at myself. I don’t need fancy clothes. I just need simple garments. I’m not trying to impress anyone, least of all Demethys.
Piling my hair into a quick knot on my head, I throw on a slightly nicer cotton dress with blue flowers all over it and then dress Addie in a soft yellow dress.
Layla comes in with Jasper just then and lets him down so he can play with Addie for a moment.
“Hey,” Layla says, sitting on the chair by my door. “I heard you invited Demethys to dinner with us?”
“Yeah,” I sigh. “He told Addie he’s her father. I’m not happy about it.”
“Well, Addie seems to love him,” Layla points out. “And she needs a father figure. It’s tough to grow up without a father.”
“Do you think I’m being cruel by keeping him at arm's length?” I ask.
“I can’t judge,” Layla says with a small self-deprecating chuckle. “We all have our own ways of coping with things. I left Kerym because I didn’t think he could choose me over his family.But in the end, it was my fault for not even giving him a chance. You have to decide what’s right for you.”
“You think I should give him a chance?” I ask, surprised. “Even after what he did?”
“I’m not justifying it,” Layla says gently. “But he was hurting and he apologized. He’s been extremely patient and given you the space you requested. And you said yourself that he never acted like that before. Not once.”
Her words stick with me through dinner. I watch the way his eyes light up every time Addie talks to him and how kind he is to Jasper, how patient he is with the children. He made a mistake but I can’t bring myself to punish him forever for it.
He’s back the next day and he’s there for every meal, continuing to sit a few seats away from me to give me space but I catch the longing looks in his eyes.
And he keeps coming back, every single day. He spends the entire day with us. He brings Addie flowers and teaches her how to play some of the games of his childhood.
When he comes in on the sixth day that week, Kerym exasperatedly tells him that enough is enough and that he ought to just keep staying as long as he likes and gives him a guest bedroom to use.
“I brought something for you,” Demethys says to Addie, who has her fingers in her mouth. “Look.” He unwraps a cloth covering up a book and I let out a tiny gasp when I see it.
It’s one of the tales of Cirsheco the Wild. One of the ones I never read before. “Your Mama used to read these with me and practice her elvish.” I’m touched that he remembered.
“I know him!” Addie bounces in excitement. “Mama tells me stories about him all the time!”
“This is a new one,” Demethys says. Addie takes it carefully and rushes off to look at it.
During dinner, Addie insists on sitting in her father’s lap. I can’t help the pang in my heart at the sight.
“Harper...” he says quietly, looking into my eyes when he catches me staring. “Would you please consider coming back with me? I promise I’ll never touch you like that again. I’ll never, ever let myself say such cruel things. It was a mistake.”
I stare at him. He’s never offered that to me before. “I want you to come back and let me be the best father that you could ever want or need.”
Seeing Addie beaming up at him has the last of the ice melting around my heart. “Okay,” I say softly. I can’t deny how his actions have touched my heart.
Maybe Layla is right. I can’t keep my heart closed off forever. “I’ll come back,” I say. “I want to try again.”