Page 75 of Exposed to Him

“Harder!” I shout and he smirks at me, moving faster and claiming my body like he does because the sex is this good every time.

“Fuck, you feel so good, baby. That’s right, tighten around me. Come on, beautiful, I know you can.” His veins bulge in his neck and arms, and he looks and feels so strong. His words make me come undone, and I pulsate around him in the most beautiful way. He soon follows me in my release.

“Shit! Ah, yes, fuck!” he growls, and lets go. We are both panting and out of breath from what we just experienced. The thought of never having him in my life makes me sick. I just don’t know how much longer I can go on like this.

Graduation was bittersweet. The day flew by and I can’t believe it’s been four years without my mother. I wish she was here today to see me get my degree. I hope she is looking down on me somewhere and is proud of me.

Jared takes me to a nice restaurant after the ceremony and now we are walking hand in hand to his bike. He spins mearound, planting his lips on mine as we lean on his bike. The love I feel for this man is indescribable. I want to spend the rest of my life with him. I’m just scared.

His phone rings during our heavy make out session and I groan.

“Baby, I have to take this.” He holds up a finger then kisses my cheek. I nod in understanding, but I know he can see my face and my real feelings shining through.

A couple of minutes later he walks back over to me and grabs my hand. I already know what he’s going to say.

“Really, Jared? You can’t give it a rest for one fucking night?” My voice sounds more harsh than I meant, but I’m pissed.

“Baby, you don’t understand.” I rip my hand away.

“You know what? I do understand. I understand that your crew means more to you than me!” I cry.

“Fuck this.” I spin around and start walking away from him. He gently grabs my arm and I yank back. “Don’t touch me right now. Go and do whatever it is that you do and leave me the fuck out of it.”

“Erica, please don’t do this, baby. I fucking need to do this.”

“You’re being selfish, Jared.” I point my finger at his chest as the tears stream down my face. His shoulders sag in defeat, and I walk away with my head held high and my heart in pieces.

Feeling off

I walk and I walk for what seems like ages. My legs hurt and my eyes burn from crying. It’s dark out now, and Jared has been blowing up my phone non-stop. I’m not feeling like myself. I gave him four years and he promised me he would try and get out.

My emotions have been heightened lately and I just feel off. Shannon texted me as well and I responded, letting her know I’m okay and just want to be alone. There really is nowhere else for me to go, because I have been living with Jared for the past three years.

I decide to sit on the park bench and watch the ducks swim in the lake with not a care in the world. I watch the birds fly above me as the sun is beginning to set, and I wish in that moment that I was a bird and I could fly away.

My stomach starts to growl. I’m hungry again. I have been hungry more lately, too. Now that I’m thinking of it, I haven’t had my period in a while.

I shoot up off the bench and start breathing heavily. Panic starts to grip my throat as I start to hyperventilate.

“Miss? Miss, are you okay?” I hear, and then my vision starts to blur. Moments later I feel myself falling fast down into the darkness.

My eyes feel heavy. When I open them a man is staring at me, yelling into his phone. He hangs up and helps me back to the bench. “I called the EMTs; they are on the way.” He then comes into focus and I see it’s Tony, Jared’s brother.

“Erica, what happened? Do you want me to call Jared?” he asks.

“No, please don’t. I’m fine. Really.” He doesn’t seem convinced.

“What are you doing here anyway?” I query, and he gives me one of his signature smirks. He’s sweaty and dressed in workout clothes.

“I was jogging by when I noticed you sitting there, and then I saw you start to panic.”

Tony and Jared have had a better relationship over the past three years. He comes over every now and then, and I can see the looks that he gives me. I know he cares for me, but I love Jared and I can’t get mixed up in all of that. Tony has been a good friend to me, and from the stories that Jared told me he has changed tremendously.

He gives me a look of pity, and I hate that.

“What’s wrong, Erica? You can tell me.” I open my mouth to speak, but that’s when we hear the sirens. I stop what I am about to say as tears spring to my eyes.

“Come here.” He pulls me in for a hug. He’s sweaty and sticky, but I don’t care because I feel comforted in this moment. Tony is usually there when I need him the most. This seems to be an ongoing thing with us.

---