Page 116 of The Twins

“Can he be our daddy?” I blurt out.

“Our daddy?”

“He already is, but you know what I mean. Ours.”

“I can’t force him to feel that way for me,” Remo says, and I can feel the frown on his voice. “He doesn’t seem like the type to break the binary boundaries of society.”

“We’ll have an open conversation about it,” I tell him, turning around to straddle him. “That’s all I ask for, Remo. Talk to me. To your brother. We love you. I love you more than anyone… But he idolizes you.”

“At this age?” Remo smirks.

“At this age and forever. Vegas wants to see you thrive. That’s what Andre wanted, and I’ll forever be grateful that he pushed you in that direction. Are you doing what you want right now?” I ask, narrowing my eyes at him.

He nods. “I’m with the people I love, and I’m helping those that need it.”

“Is that what you wanted? What about changing the world?” I insist. “Being an internationally known brainiac that fucks every supermodel from Rio to Barcelona and Milan? Male, female, and everything outside of that?”

His smoldering eyes expose his reaction to my accusation.

“If they gave me the world right now, I’d hand it back.” I let my hand drift over his knee. I trace the bumps of his bones, his strong muscles. “I promise you, Grey. I may not be happy all the time, but it’s all in my head. You know what it’s like to be weighed down by that voice in your head, directing your every thought and move. I’m trying. I won’t ever stop trying to get better. I don’t want to hurt you, but I also don’t want to hurt myself. At the end of the day, that’s who I should do things for.”

He inhales, and I feel his chest rise and fall. “Otherwise, it won’t work. I have to love myself.”

“I love you more than anyone else, yourself included. But I know that it’s not enough, and I’ll be here to remind you, Remo. We’ll be here,” I promise him.

The blue butterfly near the brick fire pit takes off. Mesmerized by its beauty, I watch in fascination as its wings flutter.

Soon, the butterfly vanishes.

I close my eyes, and the last thing I see is an endless blue, engulfing me in its ominous but majestic depths.

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