Page 36 of I Want You

“You’re too kind of a soul, that’s why. Let’s have it then.”

“Make a coffee first.”

“That bad?” Gen asked, but I could tell she was playing with me. She knew this was coming. I’d had certain doubts last night but that had been the bubbles going to my head, and the heat of the moment. I couldn’t live in a lust-filled state forever. Gen hit the button on her coffee maker and waited for it to brew. As the dark liquid fell into the cup, I sat down at the kitchen bench and waited. Slowly, she turned around, coffee in her hand as she sipped at it.

“You know we don’t have a future together. I mean…you’re the other woman who broke apart my marriage.”

Gen’s face soured. “You know I was probably the catalyst for you leaving him but I didn’t break it apart. He did.”

That was true. He had been the guilty party in my marriage. I didn’t know why I was projecting onto Gen. She’d just been the woman he had duped into bed.

“You knew he was married.”

“Yes, but don’t think for a second that if it weren’t for me, he would have been faithful. He was born to cheat, he wants his cake and to eat it too. But also, if it weren’t for me, you would never have had such a mind blowing experience in bed.”

I felt the heat rush to my cheeks and I looked away.

“I could say I’ve ruined you for men.”

My eyes shot back to hers, which held a glimmer of amusement. She may not be wrong about that either.

“How about this…we’re from different worlds. I haven’t got even a touch of the money you have.”

“You’re just making up reasons now.”

Maybe I was. I didn’t know what I wanted.

“Look, Mattie, if you truly don’t want to see where this goes. Then leave. Walk out the door and I won’t contact you again but what if you found something with me and you walk away and never find it again?”

My heart was beating incredibly fast, my mind racing even faster. I just didn’t know what to do. The last time I felt this nervous and excited, I had to choose a subject at school to focus on for the rest of my life.

I’d chosen poorly then, and I would choose poorly now.

Unless I took a chance.

As I took my final sip of coffee, I was about to answer when her phone started to ring. She looked to the side of the room where it was vibrating along the marble countertop.

“Sorry,” she said. “That’s my dad. Just a minute.”

I was a little put off, but I understood the relationship she had with him was strong so I sat, my mind racing about whether or not I should go with the reckless decision or not.

This could make or break me.

The decision was sitting at the pit of my stomach, making the acid in the organ sizzle and slosh about with the caffeine.

She hung up the phone, her mind not on the task at hand. “Are you okay?”

“I’m sorry,” she said, turning to me. “I have to go see my dad. You can stay as long as you want, just lock up after, okay?”

I wanted to ask her if she was okay but she ran down the hall to get dressed. Confused, I could only think to comfort her at this point.

I ran after her just as she was jumping in the shower.

“Do you want me to come with you?” I asked her. The thought of meeting her dad was a little off putting and yet exciting. She had said she wanted to introduce me to him on the island. I just hadn’t expected to ever do that.

“No,” she shouted over the sound of the steamy water. “I’m fine.”

The rejection hit harder than I thought it would. I was lucky I hadn’t chosen her and to live a reckless life like I had been on the precipice of doing. I backed out of the bathroom and headed for my clothes, laying scattered all over the lounge room floor. I quickly undid my robe and got dressed, scraping my hair into a messy bun before I grabbed my clutch and I walked out of the apartment, my head screaming at me for being such a fool.

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