Page 15 of Kiss Me Again

But Ben didn't get upset; he didn't even yell at me. He turned around again after I confessed, and when he saw my terrified gaze, he...hugged me. I started crying then, and he said it was just a 'stupid bike.'

I will never forget that day...

"So, now it's your turn, princess," he keeps whispering into my ear, and another wave of goosebumps covers my skin. "Cards on the table; I’m not looking at you."

"I can't come," I blurt out right away before I change my mind and run, so that he won’t find out my deepest secret, the one that even Di doesn't know. I am too ashamed to tell my best friend that I can’t pleasure myself.

"You can't climax?" Ben clarifies after a pause, holding me firmly in his arms from behind. I guess he, too, is afraid that I may run away if he lets me go.

"No." I shake my head, unable to say anything more.

"Have you tried to..."

"Yes. Everything," I interrupt him, feeling my cheeks flush in embarrassment. "At first, I wanted Fred, my ex, to be my first time, but when he touched me, I...I felt nothing, nothing at all."

"Have you ever...felt anything with anyone else?" he asks carefully, and I know what he means: Have I felt anything when he was kissing me?

"Yes" is the only thing I say without clarifying who it was and when exactly. He knows anyway, I'm sure.

"But...I don't understand. What's the rush of losing your virginity?"

"Because..." I start but bite my tongue. Will he understand? "Because I'm afraid I'll go to college and sleep with someone, feel nothing, and then he’ll tell everyone and I'll be ashamed."

There: I said it. The real reason why I decided to lose my virginity. Because I want to see if it was Fred who didn't arouse me or if the real problem is me, and I'll die without experiencing a real orgasm.

"And I'll have to study with those people for years with them knowing that I'm broken."

"You're not broken, princess," he chuckles into my ear and wraps his arms around me even tighter, squeezing me in a hug. "That's ridiculous. If a guy can't please a woman, he won't tell everyone that she didn't come; it would be his problem." He kisses my neck, and a new shiver runs through me. I feel both butterflies and anger because he’s laughing at me.

"I want to bite you for calling me ridiculous," I confess. No more lies. I won't run, hide, or lie about my feelings. I'll tell him everything on my mind because not speaking to him didn't do either of us any good.

This time, Ben laughs, burrowing his face into my neck. "I didn't say that, and you know it."

This. Him. It all feels so good that I don't ever want to wake up if it's a dream.

"Are you sure you tried...everything?" he asks after a long pause. His voice is different now: lower, huskier, more seductive. I think I am already aroused just from that sexy baritone.

Ben's hands unclench around my waist, and his fingers move to the buttons of my blouse. I shudder, holding my breath.

As he unbuttons it, I feel the hardness in his jeans pressing into my lower back.

He's already hard. For me.

"Give me your hand," he says and takes my fingers in his, my wrist against his palm as he brings it to the lace of my bra.

CHAPTER NINE

BEN

"Do you feel it?" I whisper a question into Mia's ear as I place her hand on one of her breasts.

My palm covers her hand as I brush her fingers over the fabric of her underwear.

My cock twitches in my jeans, but I ignore it. This night is not about me. It's about Mia.

"Do you feel your nipples becoming hard when you touch them like that?" I continue, caressing her body.

Mia's breasts turn out to be bigger than I thought, and I am pleasantly surprised. I’ve imagined touching this girl many times, but it never felt as good as it does now.

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