Page 32 of Fear and Desire

“Very nice. I might do this without tearing you—much—after all.”

“Master, please, please be careful…” she begged.

“Hands and knees,now!”

She started crying as she turned over, presenting her beautiful and well-punished bottom.

“Reach back and pull yourself apart for me!”

She looked back at him for a moment as though she didn’t quite believe he would order her to take part in her own assault. But at his glare, she placed her hands on each cheek and spread them apart, revealing the lovely pink rosette that was his to claim. There was nothing fake about the rush of power-filled lust that tore through him. He wanted to possess and conquer her, and forcing anal submission was just about the most satisfying way to accomplish that, for sadists like him.

He placed the tip of his cock at the dimple and gave a small push. It yielded slightly, evoking a small cry from Laura. He grabbed her hips—her lovely hips that were so perfectly formed to use as handles—and pushed just a little harder. He would draw this out as long as he dared, walking a fine line between being careful and giving a show to DeLeo. She protested, and her hands let go of her skin to push him back and off. He slapped her ass hard and grabbed her wrists, pinning them together with one of his hands. They made an even better handle.

He pushed in an inch more and held still. She tried to twist away, but he held her tight. He pushed again, and she raised her head up, chanting “Ow ow ow ow!” And then without warning, he gripped her wrists hard and pushed himself all the way in. She screamed. Once he was in, he held still for a moment until her cries calmed to small sobs, and her breathing slowed. He pulled out slowly, relishing her cry of protest, and then plunged back in all the way to his balls. She started fighting him, so he grabbed her hair and pulled back hard, yanking her face up and off the mat and immediately quelling her rebellion. As he pumped in and out, not slowing down at all, her cries of pain changed into sounds he would have sworn were cries of pained arousal.

It only took a few minutes before his insides reached the boiling point. He yanked his cock out and tore off the condom, and as he stroked the length, he shouted out his orgasm. His cum sprayed all over her back as every muscle in his whole body seized up, and he lost the ability to breathe.

As he forced air back into his lungs, he watched his cum trickle back down into the gaping hole from which he had just removed himself. The sight was mesmerizing. He released her hair, reluctant to let go of the silky strands.

Like yesterday, he affected an uncaring attitude as he zipped up. He was still breathing hard as he walked out of the room, leaving her on hands and knees, tears streaking her face and his cum drying on her back. He nodded to Josh, who disappeared into the room, and went back to his office and made himself a drink.

He was drinking a lot these days.

What he’d just done disgusted him—but not as much as it should have. He’d crossed a line yesterday, one that he’d sworn he’d never cross, despite the atrocities that defined this operation. And now that he’d crossed that line the first time, crossing the next line today had been easier. Was he losing himself? Experiencing the rush of power that came with fucking an unwilling woman? He wouldn’t be the first undercover agent who’d been lured into the very darkness they were trying to fight.

And yet… the sounds she’d made at the end—those were the same sounds made by submissives in BDSM clubs who were relishing the pain and humiliation they were receiving, and who were riding the slope up towards their own orgasm. To make sure he hadn’t been hearing only what he wanted to hear, he’d glanced at the cleft between her thighs as he zipped himself up. It had been dripping wet and swollen with need.

His beautiful Laura might just be submissive. Did that make what he was doing better, or worse?

Laura:

Laura leaned her head against the tile of the shower as the hot water cascaded down her back. Her ass was sore and stretched. She’d never been interested in anal sex before, and she still wasn’t sure how she felt about it now. But after the initial burning pain, when she was certain she was being torn apart, she’d felt something else. It made little sense. There wasnothingabout the act that was pleasurable for her, and yet she’d been so turned on, anyway. Even now, the thought of Dan taking what he wanted from her, without asking permission, sent an ache that echoed deep in her core. She didn’t want it to. She didn’t want to have good feelings aboutanythinghere.

Yesterday, when he’d ‘raped’ her for the first time, the whole situation had been overwhelming. His conflict had been clear, which made the situation confusing, and not at all arousing. Today, he’d been in control. There was no doubt who was in charge. He’d taken what he wanted, and clearly enjoyed it, and that stirred up excitement in her belly, even as she’d protested and cried out in pain.

Her finger slipped between her folds to stroke her clit, reigniting embers that hadn’t completely gone out yet. She replayed the scene from just minutes ago, and the touch of her other finger on the sore tissue of her back passage was enough to send her into an upward spiral. She imagined Dan forcing his cock in there again, and her legs buckled as an orgasm swept through her.

The arousal fled, and it left her confused and uncertain. She bitterly resented that this place had stirred up all these feelings. She was tired of the mixed up emotions, the pain, the pleasure, always uncertain what was real and what wasn’t. Suddenly, it was all too much, and she sank to the floor of the shower, the flood of her tears indistinguishable from the cascade of water sluicing over her head.

19

Laura:

Thelessonsinobediencecame at her daily, and for a while, she coped well enough. She was learning to offer herself for punishment or torment without protest, something that gave her a confusing thrill as she draped herself over a piece of equipment. The thrill lasted only until the first painful blow landed on her permanently tenderized butt.

One day, however, she’d had enough. Master 1 instructed her to place her fists underneath her breasts, keeping her fingers tucked away, and lift them up so he could apply the cane. She whimpered in fear as she obeyed, her eyes tightly shut.

“Laura,” he said, “lift your head up and out of the way.”

She did as he ordered, her breathing quick and irregular. She must have loosened her hands from their tight fist, for when the first blow from the slim rattan cane hit her breast, it also struck one thumb. The pain of her breast paled compared to the pain radiating through her thumb. She screamed and let go, cradling her hand between her breasts. Dan was immediately at her side, gently extracting her thumb and examining it. His furrowed brow and apparent concern directly contrasted with what he said next.

“It’s fine. That will teach you to keep it tucked away like I told you to. Now, let’s try that again.”

It was too much. She stared at him for a long moment. “No.”

The word hung heavy in the air.

“No?” His voice was incredulous.

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