Page 84 of Broken

What the fuck was I going to do? I doubted Kai wanted another child. He practically said as much when he left yesterday. 'We won't repeat the past.' That's what he said. Well, here I was fucking everything up again. Me, too fucking broken to do things right. Cursed and haunted by my past, by my trauma and baggage.

forty-nine

Kai

SomethingseemedoffwithSin when I talked to her last night. I told Mia about our strained conversation.

"Maybe she's just stressed over work stuff, Kai. I wouldn't read into it too much." Guilt ate at me for going to Mia, but since Sinclair came back into our lives, we all agreed to try to be the best friends we used to be. Plus, Mia knew Sin better than any of us.

"I guess. You do know her best." I gave in.

"Babes. You know her better than anyone, not me. Try talking to her if you're that worried." Mia sipped her coffee.

Mia looked around the little diner, the same diner we would hang out at in high school. She was probably looking for Noah.

He asked if he could tag along when he heard Mia, and I had plans. He wouldn't talk about their relationship, but he didn't hide it either. I asked Sin if Mia told her anything, and she said it was complicated.

"Mia, will you tell me what's going on between you and Noah?" I asked.

"Kai, I wish I knew. Honestly. It's complicated."

"Funny, Sinclair told me the same thing" Mia probably gave her the same answer.

"Sorry Kai." She looked down at her phone. "Hey. I gotta go. If your brother does show up, tell him hi for me."

Mia pulled a five-dollar bill out of her jean pocket and dropped it on the table before leaving.

I sat there for a while; I didn't need to be at the office for another hour. I wondered what it'd be like to just pick up and leave, move down to Palm Springs and be closer to Sin and Aine. We could be an actual family instead of this bullshit of daily phone calls, meeting up when it fits into our schedules.

Fucking hell, my mother hadn't even met her own granddaughter yet. The situation was bullshit and I needed to find a way to make it right. I loved Sinclair and would do anything to be with her.

"So, where's Mia?" He asked, getting my attention.

I was too lost in thought to notice when my brother sat down in the seat across from me.

"Oh. She had to go. Probably to open the shop. She did tell me to tell you hi. You need to figure out whatever this thing is between the two of you, soon bro."

Noah laughed. "Says the guy sitting here pining for his best friend who happens to have a kid."

Touché. My relationship was as complicated, if not more so than his and Mias. I definitely needed to fix my situation, and fast.

"What should I do, Noah? You were always there with us growing up. You witnessed the shit she went through. I'm afraid to push her too far. But I'm worried that if I sit back and let her do whatever, I'm going to lose her all over again."

Fuck. I never voiced my fear of losing Sinclair to anyone, even myself.

"Kai, did you consider the possibility that she might not want a relationship? That kid is the only person who she hasn't been hurt by in her life. That takes a toll on a person."

I never hurt Sinclair. "Noah, I never hurt her."

Noah looked at me, he didn't pass judgment or call me a liar. He just gave me a look, questioning my statement. Did I hear? Did the couple of times this month, when she thought I slept with Millie, actually count?

"Kai, do you remember the girl you dated in high school? The cheerleader." Noah asked me.

I did date a cheerleader. What was her name? Katie. I remember Sin bringing her up when she told me what happened with Adam. What

did she have to do with anything? "Yeah. So, what about her?"

"Seriously? She tormented Sinclair for four years, and when the two of you broke up, she became even worse."

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