Page 40 of Broken

Kai stood slowly, without speaking a word, and got down on his knees in front of me. "Sinclair, baby look at me." His voice was soft and comforting. There was no anger or judgment in his tone, only love.

When I did, I could see the path his tears left as they rolled down his face. Had Kai been crying? For me? "Sin, none of that was your fault. Do you understand me?"

"But"

"No, none of it. Adam was a piece of shit for forcing himself on you. If your dad didn't kill him, Noah and I would have. Your dad was not a good man either. The things he did to you, they were monstrous, and he deserved far worse than what he got in the end. Neither one of them deserve your guilt. Do you understand me?"

I nodded. A part of me wanted to believe him, he was right. He didn't say anything else; he just wrapped his arms around me, and we cried, together.

I couldn't tell how long we sat there, holding each other, but when I finally pulled away, the sun was up and the sky, the same shade of blue as Kai's eyes, as Aines eyes. I needed to talk to Kai about her, but I didn't even know where to begin, or how to begin.

"Kai." was all my voice could manage.

"My beautiful Sin." He kissed my forehead and looked at me, all the love in the world shown in his eyes right then "Have you ever talked to someone, about your childhood, about your trauma?"

I hadn't thought about seeing anyone, I never considered it something to talk about. I just thought it was my burden to bear. "No" I answered.

"Would you be willing to see someone? I think it would help you a lot." Kai didn't talk to me as Doctor Carter, no he talked to me as my best friend, as the man who loved me.

I was at a loss for words, so I nodded my response.

"I also want you to stay with me tonight. You're leaving tomorrow, so spend your last night here with me. Please."

"Okay."

We spent the morning talking. I promised to see a therapist, and Kai promised to come down and see me often. He wanted to meet my daughter. I still hadn't told him about Aine. Well, not any crucial details, like the identity of her father.

I was afraid to tell him, afraid of what he would think, I knew he would be angry, but would he be able to forgive me someday? I swore to myself I would tell him tonight no matter what.

I was going to spend my last night in town with Kai here at his cabin. I told him we still needed to talk.

"Baby, there will be time." He assured me. I agreed, putting off the hardest part until later.

Kai dropped me off at the hotel to pack my things and check out. We planned to meet at his cabin after he finished with his last patient for the day. I looked forward to spending the night with him.

Growing up, I was the worst cook. Mia and Kai would laugh because I burned rice crispy treats once. Being a single mother changed me a lot.

I learned to cook basic foods, and yeah, I could make simple desserts like rice crispy treats.

I did some grocery shopping, picked up a few things to make dinner, and grabbed a bottle of wine. Kai said he had patients back-to-back all day, so I thought it would be nice if I dropped lunch off for him at his office.

I was just about to get out of the car with the to-go bag from the diner Mia and I ate at the other day when I saw Kai walk out the door of his family practice. Perfect, I could avoid the awkward introduction with whoever sat at the reception counter inside.

Before I opened my door, a tall, beautiful redhead walked out right behind Kai. I wanted to think it was a coincidence. Why would he tell me he loved me, why would he promise to follow me if he didn't mean it? I almost believed myself, I almost believed everything Kai had said over the past few days.

Almost, because right when the confidence built up, the light Kai brought into my darkness snuffed out. Miss Ginger Hair tilted her head back and laughed at something Kai said, and all the light left me enveloped by darkness.

Everything burned, my entire world in that very moment went up in flames. Everything that happened over the weekend, every little crack in my heart, in my soul that my time with Kai had closed, they split open. I was broken.

I had to go. I wanted to be anywhere but here. So, I just drove. At first, I drove through the main part of town. Twice. I even thought about going back to his house. To his cabin, to break something, anything, and wait for Kai to come home so I could scream at him.

That would mean facing him, facing the pain and demons that came along with betrayal. I couldn't do that. I felt overwhelmed with all the emotional upheaval from the past few days.

I got on the freeway and headed south. I hated this town and everything it represented to me. I hated the pain and the memories around every corner. I hated the ghosts and the demons who hid in the dark.

I hated the people here. I hated how the people I loved expected more from me than I had to give. I hated that I came here and fell into the fucking thirst trap I called my best friend, no Kai wasn't my best friend, not anymore.

He stopped being my best friend the day I left this town, and him behind. He probably planned it all, figured he'd have a walk down memory lane with my pussy while I was in town, then go back to his regularly scheduled program when I went home. Fuck Kai Carter.

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