Page 27 of Broken

I’m such a horrible parent, I don’t even know where my daughter is going to school. I hope one day you’ll find it in you to forgive me.

You were, you are the light in my life Sinclair. I named you after my mother, the most loving person I’ve ever known. I see her in you. Did I ever tell you that? You carry her heart, her light and her love.

You are everything wonderful that I’ve ever known in this world, and I hope and pray that I didn’t let all that be destroyed because I was weak.

Love,

Mom

I couldn't breathe. This was a Layla I never knew. She wasn't the drunken mess of a woman who put a bottle before her own daughter.

My mother preferred to hit first and not bother asking later.

I found a broken woman in these letters. She was torn down by the man she loved and trusted, just like they did to their only daughter.

None of what she wrote excused or fixed the damage they caused, but I felt bad for her. No one deserved to feel as trapped as she did, as I did.

I couldn't control the sobs that came out of me. I had never been as lost and broken as I was after reading her letters.

"Hello?"

"Fuck you." I sobbed into the phone.

"Sin, what's wrong?" The sound of sleep was apparent in Kais's voice.

"You know, I get it. I do. You fucking hate me, you have every fucking right to hate me. You really do, but why the fuck did you do it?"

I knew it was late, and I probably woke him up. I didn't care.

"Sinclair, what are you talking about?"

"All of it. Why? Why did you save all the letters and the journals? I don't want them!" I screamed into the phone. "Fucking burn them all."

"Sin, calm down and take a breath." Fabric scraped together on his end, and he breathed heavily. "Find an anchor and focus, Count backward from ten, Sinclair"

"Oh, fuck you, Kai!" I spat and hung up. The condescending prick. He disguised his amusement as concern and attempted to guide me through a panic attack. Fuck him.

I stood and pulled my leg back to kick the box across the room when

I heard the door open. I looked up, he stood there barefoot and shirtless, wearing nothing but a pair of grey pants.

Of course, Kai would be sexy after running down the street barefoot and half-naked. Only Kia would taste like heaven in the middle of the night.

"Oh Sin. I'm sorry. I didn't expect you to show up here." He took the letter out of my hand and wrapped me in his arms.

I sobbed into his bare chest. The scent of fresh air filled my lungs as I kept asking him Why.

I pushed at his chest so I could see those blue eyes that haunted my dreams every night since I said goodbye. "Why couldn't you just let me go."

Kai smoothed my hair and soothed me, letting me cry all my tears refusing to let me go.

"Because I couldn't save you," Kai confessed.

I didn't understand. I never needed to be saved, not really. I mean Noah always saved me from trouble. They needed to be saved from me. I destroyed everything. I ruined people's lives. At least that's what I thought my whole life. That's how my parents treated me. Toxic darkness spread and consumed every bit of light and happiness people had.

Kai wanted to save me. Why me? "Why?"

"All those times you would come to my window, or when Mia and I would sneak food to you through your window, I never forgot those times. I wanted to take care of you, but you never let us.