“Good, now that I have your attention.” Sarah turned towards me, crossing her legs under her. “You aren’t really going to go take a shower and let the men handle this shit, are you?”

“What else can I do?” I asked, leaning my head against the wall. “I’m so far out of my depth here.”

“There has to be something we can do.”

She and I sat for a few moments in silence, thinking.

“It’s funny,” I said.

“What?”

“Earlier at work, I was thinking about Ethyl. Do you remember her?”

“Of course I do. I love that old bat. She is the one who taught me that pimp slap you just got.”

“Of course she did.” I rolled my eyes, touching my cheek that still felt like it was on fire.

“What about her?”

“Kylie said something this morning that got me thinking. She said that nothing ever happened to Sif. Shemadethings happen. I was wondering if things were happening to me, and I was just letting them.”

“The fuck does that mean?”

“It means I was thinking I was just watching my life pass me by. Rolling with the punches and not landing any of my own. I feel like I’m not actively taking part in my own life,” I explained.

“Yeah, I’m still lost.”

“It means I’m not being my own hero; I’m not part of the party riding out to slay the dragon. I’m playing the part of the princess stuck in a tower, just waiting for someone to save me.”

“So where does Ethyl come into the story?” Sarah asked, leaning against the wall.

“I’m not sure.” I shrugged. “The wise knight I squired for? That isn’t the point. The point is, she always did what she needed to do herself. She was a badass, who yes, did occasionally make questionable life choices, but shemadethose choices. No one else. That’s what I need to do. I can’t just take a passive role anymore.”

“Good!” She jumped to her feet then helped me up. “So what is the first step in this non-passive plan?”

“Fuck if I know. Let’s go see what the boys are doing and go from there?”

* * *

It was just Rune and Murmur in the security room. Murmur was tapping away on a computer. Rune had his phone up to his ear until he saw me.

“Do it and call me the second you have anything,” he said into the phone, then hung up.

“I can’t sit by and do nothing,” I said. “Let me be a part of getting her back.”

Rune put his hands on my shoulders. “You will be.”

His touch was too soft. It didn’t feel like the touch of a man who’d just railed me against a bookshelf less than an hour ago. It didn’t even feel like a concerned friend. It felt like the touch you give someone on their deathbed, meant to be comforting, but more patronizing, like he was afraid I would shatter under a slight breeze.

“We’ll come get you the moment we have any information. You will ride shotgun when we go get her. But there is nothing you can do right now.”

“There has to besomething,” I pleaded.

“There isn’t. We have already tracked Sif’s phone and the license plate of the van, which was stolen. Murmur has called everyone she knows to see if they have heard from her. So far, we are coming up empty. We even have an Amber Alert for Vivi. Every demon in the police department is pulling resources. We will find her, but there is nothing more you can do right now.” Rune tried to pull me into a hug, but I couldn’t stand the idea of being pitied.

Not by anyone.

But especially not by him.