Page 103 of Truck You

I jerk my arm away and take a few steps back. “You’re wrong. I do mean it. Goodbye, Sophia.”

I take off for the door before anyone else can stop me.

I know I’m overreacting. I should give her a chance to explain herself or at least listen to what she’s saying. But I can’t.

I just can’t right now.

I need to get out of here, and fast.

Between my anxiety, my mom’s random appearances in my life, the siblings I’ve never met, Tanner fucking with me, and my inability to keep Sophia safe, I can’t see things clearly.

As soon as the cold night air hits me, my breath catches, and I know I’ve made a huge mistake.

I should go back in there and apologize to her. I should take her in my arms and hold her close. I should tell her that she’s right.

Iamscared. I’m fucking terrified. And not for the reason she thinks.

I love her, and I just walked away from her because I’m terrified she’ll leave me first.

I’m such a fucking asshole, and this is one more example of why I don’t deserve her.

Chapter26

I’m not fine. We’re not fine. Nothing. Is. Fine.

Sophia

Four days. Four heartbreakingly painful days.

It’s as if Mac vanished into thin air after he stormed out of the bar on Friday night. Not a word or the slightest peek of him at the garage. If it weren’t for this giant hole inside me, I’d swear he never existed.

Even with his absence, work has been awkward for the past two days. No one mentions him, and they all keep looking at me like I’m going to break.

Newsflash. I’m stronger than that.

Yes, I’m hurt and confused and miss him far more than I should. It’s not like we’ve been dating for years. It’s been two months since we met at the Apple Festival. That’s not long enough for me to feel this empty inside from us breaking up.

But I am empty, and every hour and minute that passes without hearing from him makes it harder for me to fight the urge to break down.

I haven’t cried yet. I’ve wanted to, several times actually, but I’ve fought it like a badass bitch refusing to admit she’s hurt.

I’ve spent much of my life protecting myself from men who won’t accept me for who I am. Men who say women can’t or shouldn’t race cars. Men who don’t think I have any business working on cars. Men who think I’m weird because I’d rather be covered in grease instead of make-up. I prefer coveralls or jeans and a t-shirt over fancy clothes or dresses. Sure, I like to get dressed up on occasion, but it’s not my preferred attire.

Mac accepted all of that about me. He never questioned my skills or doubted my abilities. Overprotective for sure, but that had nothing to do with my career choice. He made me feel beautiful and sexy behind the wheel of a racecar. No man has ever done that before.

“Morning,” Clara’s voice drags me away from the kitchen window where I’ve been staring at the snow falling since I woke up.

“Morning. I think the coffee is done.” I glance over at the pot I made when I got up, realizing I was so lost in my thoughts that I didn’t hear it beep.

“Still nothing?” she asks as she grabs two coffee mugs from the cabinet above the pot. While she pours the coffee, I grab the creamer from the refrigerator for her.

“Nope. At this point, I don’t expect to hear from him. He’s made his choice, and it’s not me.”

“Soph, it’s only been a few days. Give him time. He’ll come around.”

I shake my head. “He’s done with me. I need to accept that and move on.”

“No, he’s not.” Her words are firm and maybe even a little scolding. “Listen to me. I’ve known Mac my entire life. He’s got a lot of issues, especially where women are concerned. All the Mutter brothers do. He loves you. I know he does.”

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