Page 112 of Say My Name

I think back to Devereaux’s file. There’s not much written about his upbringing. “Was your father a bad man?”

Devereaux chuckles. “I guess you could say that. He never cared much for us. We were more of a prized possession than his children.”

The server drops off my salad and Devereaux’s pan-seared chicken. When she’s gone, I ask him to explain what he means about his father.

“He liked to show us off. ‘Look at me, I’m a great father to these children.’” He picks up his fork. “But when we got home, he couldn’t care less if we had dinner before bed. He’d sit in his office, drinking himself into a coma.”

“Because he missed your mom?”

This question makes Devereaux laugh. “I don’t know. Yeah, I guess.”

“I’m sorry.” Now, it’s my turn to reach a hand across the table. Devereaux gives a half-smile and changes the subject, asking me about my mom and sister. I give him safe, generic information and when there’s a lull in the conversation, I ask, “How come you don’t hire blondes?”

He sets his cutlery on his plate. “My mother had blonde hair. I guess I just didn’t want the reminder.” He studies me for a moment before saying, “Sometimes, I feel like you have the same gravitational pull she did.” He smiles. “She had this way about her. It made everyone want to be around her. She’d walk into a room and all eyes would be on her.”

My chest expands, my heart beating harder in my chest. “She sounds like everyone loved her.”

“Yeah.” He’s lost a bit of his luster from earlier when he was talking about his mother. “They did.”

“I’m so sorry,” I say, knowing these words aren’t enough. They’re never enough for a person who’s lost someone. “What’s your best memory of her?”

His voice holds a rasp of excitement as he pushes his plate a bit. “When I was younger we used to rule the streets. Roman, Ledger, and I would ride our bikes all day, not caring about a thing in the world. We were always looking for trouble. I was about eleven, or twelve.”

I smile as he tells his story.

“My father was always working. Busy all the time. So, my mother would invite all the kids over to play at our house. She loved a house full of chatter.”

“Our house was always bubbling over with kids too,” I add.

“There was one kid. His father worked for mine, and he was a real asshole.”

I laugh a little under my breath. “You can’t call a kid an asshole.”

“Oh, this one was. My mother once kicked him out of the house. She told him she didn’t want him coming around anymore.” He pulls his wallet out of his pocket, grabbing his card to pay the bill. “My father caught wind of the story and fired the kid’s dad.”

“Where’s that kid now?”

He shrugs as the waitress takes his card. “Still being an asshole, I’m sure.”

Chapter 32

Devereaux

I pull up to the club like I’m a guest tonight. When I told Swan no one would know us, I meant it. I want her to explore the club without the worry that anyone will recognize her.

Honestly, no one’s paying attention.

When she came downstairs dressed as a goddess in white, I nearly skipped the party in favor of staying home with her all night. I’m dressed in a black Armani suit with a red vest and a devil-style mask that covers three quarters of my face. I want to make sure I’m not recognized.

Even if I am, who cares? Sex isn’t shameful.

It’s why I started a club so people could explore their sexuality in a safe space.

People shouldn’t shy away from wanting pleasure. And I want Swan to fulfill her fantasies. I’m ready to give her anything she asks of me. It’s terrifying because I’ve never felt this way about anyone.

But I can’t stop. There’s something about her that’s pulling me in.

Something I can’t quite identify.

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